The Wicked Dreams of Paula Schultz

The subject matter notwithstanding, this picture is a colossal waste of time and film...I cannot for the life of me figure out why anyone decided to actually sign a contract to do this...the ONLY reason to give it anything more than a 1 is because there are enough scenes of Elke to elevate it to a 2...and spoiling the ending wouldn't come into play here...it would be a patriotic duty to tell everyone how it ends...so they can skip watching it...I think it is a tribute to the other members of the "Hogan's Heroes" cast that they didn't either agree to make this piece of trash or weren't asked...in which case they should thank their lucky stars or buy a lottery ticket...and what is really astonishing is that you can actually find this pseudo-feature on the Net...I found a copy on Half.com...so if you're in the market for one of the worst movies in cinematic history...my suggestion is you go trolling there...

The idea of using the Hogan's Heroes cast in a cold war farce could have been delicious. The Paula Schultz character, her circumstances, and goals, could have made for a very interesting cold war farce. Bob Crane, stepping out of character, to form a complex blend of con man, sadist, and American patriot, had definite possibilities. Unfortunately, when they put them all together. This is the mess they got. I can hardly believe that George Marshall (!!!) is the credited director on this disjointed, slapsticky, murky mess.

The absolutely one and only reason to watch this cinematic stinkeroo is to see the cast of "Hogan's Heroes" in a Cold War setting rather than World War II. (And that's a dubious enough reason.) Instead of Nazi Germany being run by a bunch of bumbling idiots, in this film, it's East Germany. The taste of the original television series was questionable, and this film only underlines that judgement. Avoid it if you can.

This trashy cheap comedy has only one reason to be preserved. That saving grace is Elke Sommers. Elke is the most beautiful actress in Hollywood. Her costumes were amazing. They showed so much but still concealed. She is constantly losing her clothes in delightful ways. The scene in the white satin dress is the stuff that dreams are made of. Her expressions, her voice, her accent, her hair, her eyes...I can watch that scene over & over again. That sounds adolescent, but I was an adolescent when I first watched this film. Elke had many other good scenes:her fight with agent outside the club was fun as were the high jump over the tower of bottles; dancing on the bed wearing a bedspread;the torn dress that belonged to Forman's wife (who is also quite comely in a different way). So why not give it a ten? Because the awful script & the clumsy antics of the East German agents rate a 0. I will give it +1 for Joey Forman's believability and +7 for Elke. In summary, not an ounce of appeal for women and only has appeal for men who still recall their adolescent dreams.

This movie, like many comedy pictures from earlier in the sixties and the prior decade, includes some slapstick humor, a guy and a girl being pursued by bad guys, and a series of romantic misunderstandings that lead to outlandish situations and humorous dialog. In addition to that, add some major characters from Hogan's Heroes to a film that, again, pokes fun at some seriously misguided Germans, and you have a picture that is fun to watch, for those who get it. The setting for the picture is Germany in the cold war era, so in this case, the bumbling villains are East German communists instead of world war two Nazis.

This movie is probably not for everyone. If you are not fond of fifties and sixties romantic comedies that substitute somewhat risqué innuendo for graphic sex scenes, then you may find this movie to be too mild. If you thought that Hogan's Heroes' theme of mocking Europe's second world war oppressors was in poor taste, then you may find this film to be just as distasteful. If you hold the view that soviet communism was a great idea that was misunderstood and you can't wait for Vladimir Putin to restore it to eastern Europe, then you will probably hate this movie. However, if you are not among those who hold such views, then you may find that this picture contains some enjoyably ironic humor and is fun to watch. Just sit back and enjoy this light comedy with Bob Crane and Elke Sommer.