The Wicked Dreams of Paula Schultz

The absolutely one and only reason to watch this cinematic stinkeroo is to see the cast of "Hogan's Heroes" in a Cold War setting rather than World War II. (And that's a dubious enough reason.) Instead of Nazi Germany being run by a bunch of bumbling idiots, in this film, it's East Germany. The taste of the original television series was questionable, and this film only underlines that judgement. Avoid it if you can.

This movie, like many comedy pictures from earlier in the sixties and the prior decade, includes some slapstick humor, a guy and a girl being pursued by bad guys, and a series of romantic misunderstandings that lead to outlandish situations and humorous dialog. In addition to that, add some major characters from Hogan's Heroes to a film that, again, pokes fun at some seriously misguided Germans, and you have a picture that is fun to watch, for those who get it. The setting for the picture is Germany in the cold war era, so in this case, the bumbling villains are East German communists instead of world war two Nazis.

This movie is probably not for everyone. If you are not fond of fifties and sixties romantic comedies that substitute somewhat risqué innuendo for graphic sex scenes, then you may find this movie to be too mild. If you thought that Hogan's Heroes' theme of mocking Europe's second world war oppressors was in poor taste, then you may find this film to be just as distasteful. If you hold the view that soviet communism was a great idea that was misunderstood and you can't wait for Vladimir Putin to restore it to eastern Europe, then you will probably hate this movie. However, if you are not among those who hold such views, then you may find that this picture contains some enjoyably ironic humor and is fun to watch. Just sit back and enjoy this light comedy with Bob Crane and Elke Sommer.

This trashy cheap comedy has only one reason to be preserved. That saving grace is Elke Sommers. Elke is the most beautiful actress in Hollywood. Her costumes were amazing. They showed so much but still concealed. She is constantly losing her clothes in delightful ways. The scene in the white satin dress is the stuff that dreams are made of. Her expressions, her voice, her accent, her hair, her eyes...I can watch that scene over & over again. That sounds adolescent, but I was an adolescent when I first watched this film. Elke had many other good scenes:her fight with agent outside the club was fun as were the high jump over the tower of bottles; dancing on the bed wearing a bedspread;the torn dress that belonged to Forman's wife (who is also quite comely in a different way). So why not give it a ten? Because the awful script & the clumsy antics of the East German agents rate a 0. I will give it +1 for Joey Forman's believability and +7 for Elke. In summary, not an ounce of appeal for women and only has appeal for men who still recall their adolescent dreams.

was Ed Wood to direct it.

I saw this on TV when I was about 10 years old and a rabid Hogan's Heroes fan. I was horrified. Yes, even at the tender age of ten I could recognize a terrible film with actors I admired trapped inside it. There's a big difference between playing a not-too-bright character skillfully, and playing a pointless buffoon.

How much of a masochist am I? Enough to re-watch this piece of crud again, 40 years later, when I spotted it online. The ten-year-old me still wanted to cry for my old TV friends, but the 50-year-old me, fortified with copious amounts of cheap wine, managed to appreciate the amusing aspects of Leon Askin's character being Werner Klemperer's flunky instead of the other way around, and to enjoy John Banner's performance… the man never missed; I can't understand why he never won an Emmy. Klemperer in his underwear groping a mostly-naked Elke Sommer was just gross… whose idea was it to give Sommer's character the last name of 'Schultz', providing Klemperer the unenviable challenge of saying lines like "my darling Schultz"? We get it; it's a gimmick film with a gimmick cast, and that's about as subtle as a sledgehammer between the eyes. I'm sorry, Mr. Klemperer; you were better than that.

And Bob Crane was there. Mostly being Bob Crane. Nothing much to report.

I'd love to see the Rifftrax guys get their hands on this one someday.

The idea of using the Hogan's Heroes cast in a cold war farce could have been delicious. The Paula Schultz character, her circumstances, and goals, could have made for a very interesting cold war farce. Bob Crane, stepping out of character, to form a complex blend of con man, sadist, and American patriot, had definite possibilities. Unfortunately, when they put them all together. This is the mess they got. I can hardly believe that George Marshall (!!!) is the credited director on this disjointed, slapsticky, murky mess.