A Karate Christmas Miracle

I genuinely would have given this movie zero stars if i could. The acting was horrid. The fight scenes were like kindergartners fighting over a toy. VERY UNBELIEVABLE. How could you spend 1.5 million and still end up with this trash. ABSOLUTELY WOULD NOT RECOMMEND.

This is so bad it's funny. This was made as a joke, right? Couldn't they even get someone who knew what karate was?

I don't understand how something like this can even get made. I also don't know what is more insulting, the cinematography, the transitions, the conclusion, or just the disgusting use of a tragedy for name drops in a movie.

So I found this mess on Tubi, and I like watching terrible movies from time to time to sharpen my ability to judge better films. My thought process, if you know what the least talented people put on video, then you will have a much better appreciation for what the true professionals can do.

There is utterly nothing professional about this visual abomination.

I usually don't roast the people making the films because they actually have the guts to put something out, but Kenneth Del Vecchio is clearly devoid of talent, capability and sensibility. Gonna take a shot in the dark and say his problematic political leanings plays a role in the farcical nonsense that is his filmography.

Where can we begin? It's like this movie was put together from multiple projects that absolutely fell apart. Not wanting to waste money, he put this nonsense together and passed it off as a movie. I mean, the narrative continuity of Bob Genesis (whew, what a name) is ridiculous. What makes this even more unsettling is Del Vecchio went all "Will Smith" on us and tried to make this movie as some kind of vehicle for his kid. The results are pretty awful as expected. And what the heck is up with this storyline about psychics?

This is just a mess. Make sure your furniture is bolted down because you might knock it over. Plus I'm no martial arts expert, but it looks like the kid is learning jiu jitsu, not karate. Just saying.

I loved it. The majority of all movies are bad. This is truly the bottom of the barrel.

It looks like a low budget Christian film that has been reedited with weird effects for a YouTube video. I honestly cannot believe the effects were supposed to look good. I would wager that the editors knew exactly what they were doing... Maybe.

Every aspect of this movie is garbage. From the opening hobby drone shot that was considerably shaky and grainy from low light, to random cuts to very similar shots, to characters that make you want to punch a wall. (In lieu of their face.)

Bad movies are fun to laugh at, this movie is hilarious.

My new favorite Christmas movie, and a soon to be tradition of watching every year.

Jesse's father disappeared on Christmas the previous year and they've heard nothing from him. He might be dead, he might have run away or he might have just realized what a bad movie it is and ran off. But young Jesse (Mario Del Vecchio) is having weird dreams about Eric Roberts and some evil clown having kidnapped the man and are holding him prisoner. And, in order to magically get his release, Jesse is convinced he must progress from a yellow belt in martial arts to a black belt in a week. First, HOW would this release the father??? Secondly, the yellow belt is among the lowest ranks and even Chuck Norris or Bruce Lee at their prime couldn't have progressed through a half dozen or so belts this quickly! Jesse apparently is teaching himself karate...and is giving himself these belts as he thinks he's attained them. In other words, Jesse is delusional and seems to be cheating just a bit.

At the same time, Jesse's workaholic mother wants to desperately find her husband...so much so that he pursues a psychic and begs her to help, even though the lady has retired from the craft. Oddly, almost as soon as the psychic agrees to help, the mother begs her to drop the case and go her way. I do not understand ANY of this, but it makes about as much sense as Jesse becoming a black belt in less than a week.

So is any of this good? No. It's not a dislikable film but it is very, very badly written, makes no sense and has the lowest possible production values imaginable. There is nothing about the film that is good...which makes the couple overly glowing reviews seem very, very odd.