The Ant Farm

I suspect this film was funded by the Florida Chamber of Commerce, but maybe not. Why anyone over the age of 60 would want to stay in New Hampshire instead of spending their winters in Florida is beyond my comprehension. Some people just like snow and ice a lot. They enjoy shoveling out their cars from their driveways, scrapping ice off their windshields and other joys of living in the semi-arctic environment. They don't even ski or ice skate.

This is a potential serial killer plot that turns out to be a red herring. The conclusion is pretty silly, but the rest of the film has a certain amount of suspense. Obviously shot on a very low budget, the actors did the best they could with the interesting script. Not for thrill seekers.

This is really a nice little film, few actors, and it unfolds slowly. We meet Paul, who has rented a cabin on a lake to try and finish his book, and his wife Deb comes along. They are older, and there is some controversy about what he is writing and trying to expose. On the way to the cabin, they get a flat, and within minutes the sheriff shows up to help him. You know that isn't how reality works. Anyway, the title comes from his bringing along his ant farm, as watching the ants at work relaxes him. But there doesn't seem to be anyone around. One morning he falls from the dock through the ice, and the sheriff shows up to rescue him. Another morning, he looks out onto the frozen lake, and there is a young woman on the ice who they rescue. She is the exact age of the daughter they lost, and she seems not to know who she is or how she got there. And they start to hear strange noises outside. Paul needs to make a longer trip, but he finds no matter which way he went, he winds up at the cabin. What is going on? It is really nice, with no spectacular CGI effects. Just an unfolding mystery.

Oh the ending. This movie had a 4 until...WORST. ENDING. EVER.

"Ant Farm" starts with an elderly couple going on a vacation in frozen New Hampshire where the husband wants someplace quiet and remote to write his book. They're having a pleasant time until one day they see a young girl laying on the ice outside their house. They bring her in and realize she's about the age that their long-dead daughter would have been and so feel protective and parental. She tells them the weird sheriff-who is looking for the girl and is keeping them from leaving-will kill all of them. Now, from there we ease into weird sheriff, weird kid and really really weird twist. Not just weird. Dumb. Absurd. I want so badly to spoil it for you and tell you so you will know how stupid it is so you won't be so curious as to see for yourself...but if you do, you have been warned.

This is obviously low budget, which I can excuse. The acting is quite poor, although the husband does a little better than the others. But honestly, the script did them no favors because it was pretty dire even before the terrible, awful ending. It was winter in New Hampshire, so the cinematography was a consistent gray. The direction was unremarkable. And if there was a score, it was so vague I don't remember it.

In trying to think of a positive thing to say...well at least it wasn't very long. But that ending...

The ending is probably the stupidest thing I have ever seen and this kind of payoff came after watching a grueling long and very tedious movie.

The characters were awful, with the exception of the male lead, who is a doctor writing a book about chemicals polluting the drinking water, but that is a detail relegated to perhaps three minutes of the film, none the less the actor plays the role well and is the single good actor in the whole mess.

The character of the wife is a shrewish and nagging hag, who is mentally disturbed by the death of their daughter some 30 years beforehand. Even before the storyline begins to unfold, she is pestering the husband about very unimportant details of everyday life!

The two other actors deliver emotionless portrayals, BUT you will find out why as the story progresses.

The ending is NOT worth the long and boring experience of watching this crap!