Housewife

After witnessing the horrific murders of her sister and father, by her mother, young Holly (Clementine Piodatz) flees her home. Years later, adult Holly still suffers from the repercussions of that event. Now, married to a famous author, she finds herself drawn into an esoteric cult, when an ex-lover named Valerie reenters her life.

The cult is called ULM (Umbrella of Love and Mind) and is led by the enigmatic Bruce O'Hara (David Sakurai), who is part motivational speaker, part mystic, and part televangelist. O'Hara takes Holly on a "healing journey" that apparently alters her consciousness. It also traps her in a nightmare labyrinth filled with omens, visions, and death.

HOUSEWIFE gets points for being different, though it's not as palpably malevolent as Director Can Evrenol's first film, BASKIN. While the entire movie is bizarre, most of the horror is saved for the impressive, Lovecraftian finale...

Where to start? Well the acting is a good start - the acing in this film is SO bad its almost unwatchable. It actually became laughable at a point which was the only way I made it to the end. I ended up pretending it was a comedy I was laughing so much. The story is also completely forgettable and the direction portentous. The film has the same problems as the directors previous film, all style and no substance. I wouldn't be surprised if the film didn't have a screenplay its so awful in the the story telling department. The problem for me is the films the director is trying to mimic had style yes, but they also had a heart which is utterly missing from this film. I didn't care about any of the characters, what characters were there to care about? He is obviously a Fulci wannabe but he ends up more like Eli Roth - who no one wants to be. If it was made as a comedy, i would give it 4/5, but in reality its not so it's 1/5. His previous film did show promise but this is a real stinker. Someone get the air freshener.

Half baked and poorly written. Nothing is explained so there is no way to engage with the material, its all just happening with a vague understanding of 'oh this is supposed to be bad'. There are callbacks to things that happened in the beginning, but those things were never really explained in any way, so you don't know what they are to begin with or if they are bad or good or what, and you come to the end of the movie with no real understanding of what you just watched, but some semblance of who I suppose is Cthulhu is there, so you know it was a super spooky time. Don't waste your time, you'll be disappointed.

Relentlessly average. Not scary enough to be a decent horror movie, and not much discernible humor to make the non-scary stuff funny.

There's a pretty hot threesome scene, but that's about it for fun.

The movie starts well with what looks like an engaging and strong story, then gradually fades to the point of just wanting it to end as soon as possible.

Technically the film was fine, as was the acting as far as I am concerned - the story and the way it was told are the problem. All of a sudden it goes from being a logical progression into some kind of disjointed mess of editing that throws the viewer out of it, then desperately tries to win them back.

One to miss and/or forget.