The Legend of Robert the Doll

Was drawn into seeing 'The Revenge of Robert the Doll', with a cool poster/cover, an intriguing though far from original premise and as someone with a general appreciation for the genre it fits under. That it was low-budget, which from frequent personal experience is rarely a good sign due to that there are so many poor ones out there (though there are decent to good ones as well), made me though apprehensive.

It is sadly however yet another film seen recently, hence some reiteration because the exact same strengths and flaws present in those films are here, that to me was incredibly disappointing considering its potential which it doesn't do anywhere near enough with. 'The Revenge of Robert the Doll' is really very bad, with so many huge flaws, that are exactly the same as the previous films, and doesn't do anywhere near enough with its potential, which was quite a good deal. There is very little good here, and of the Robert films for me this was the worst due to feeling like a separate film to the series even with the titular characters in it.

Only slight redeeming quality is the sometimes spooky music score. Robert is not a redeeming quality this time, if one has seen the previous Robert films what he does in those films is very little different here, it's all un-scary and stale. Plus he is used poorly, for a titular character it was the Toymaker that seemed much more of a leading role.

Going further on to the negatives, the story does feel over-stretched and some of it comes over as vague and under-explained in the last third where the film especially became duller, more predictable, more senseless and less unsettled and never gaining momentum. All the characters are too sketchy and with cardboard thin and colourless personalities and with nowhere near enough to make one want to endear to them. Their annoying and illogical decision making and behaviours frustrates. The chemistry is bland and unfocused.

The sound quality is obvious and utilised cheaply (being too loud in the build ups and people's reactions), the effects are laughable and all of the acting is lacking severely on the whole, that's actually an understatement as the worst of it is horrendous with some of the worst German accents ever committed to celluloid. There is no sense of horror or engagement with the awful predicament they're in, and no connecting with the character, it just reeks of indifference which makes the viewer not care less too.

Dialogue can be stilted and rambling while the pace and film drags on forever, apparent from the very start, never recovering that interest is lost fast. The ending is anti-climactic and more like set-up or foreshadowing of a follow-up, have grown to be wary of these kind of endings because if the plans for the film fall through it would render this film incomplete. Found too many of the supposedly shocking moments not surprising or scary and the atmosphere dreary, due to the excessive obviousness, a lot of dumb and vague moments and explanations and the lack of tension and suspense. Thrills are none, thanks to stodginess and excessive over-familiarity, and found myself never invested in the drama, which tended to be indifferently acted, interminably paced and statically directed.

A lot of 'The Revenge of Robert the Doll' has really dull and going nowhere plot elements and often nonsensical and confusing character motivations, while too many of the things to make you shocked are far from creative or unsettling. It all feels rather tame, especially in the deaths which were as unimaginative and so what as you could possibly get. The footage included was pointless and seemed only there for padding reasons.

Nothing freaky or interesting, no development and too derivative, while everything is unimaginative and are more odd than scary, completely failing to show any sense of dread. There is nothing interesting or illuminating with what the film was trying to do and the drama is overwrought with no momentum and a lot of weirdness. The direction is leaden, got the sense their heart was not in it. 'The Revenge of Robert the Doll' is very amateurish visually, too drearily lit and shows no care in the way it's shot. The editing has more continuity errors than one can count.

In summary, very poor. 2/10 Bethany Cox

I normally get really pissed off when I waste my time on a bad film. However, don't get me wrong this is awful, but as its sooo bad it just makes you laugh. At least I won't forget this one in a hurry lool.

It will always be a mystery to me, why these kind of movies get made. Setting things up in nazi Germany around the 1940s usually goes 2 ways. It will be either extremely authentic with a lot of love to details, focussing on the cruel mindset of the fanatically following soldiers, or, just as we can see in this movie as simply another one of countless examples out there, with the main focus on crappy German accent throughout the entire dialogue lines, preferably adding nothing special to the plot and already were annoying at times of Indiana Jones and such alikes. Just because there are actors like Schwarzenegger (I know, Austrian origin, but the point remains the same), who never ever felt the need to visit a language class to get rid of this accent after living in the US for decades, it doesn't justify a movie made in 2018 to still base entire fims on this atrocity of a conversation tool. And The Revenge of Robert the Doll delivers basically only that. Terrible lines, horrible acting, bad effects and no scares whatsoever throughout the entire film. People get asked a question in this dismembered English and answer back in German. Several times with the lousy cliche "nein". Someone at some point found this funny for no reason. Imagine a country constantly jiggeling over a "no" for almost a century. Your only thought will be: What the...? I can honestly say that I had this thought all the way through, no matter what the movie brought up. On top they like to throw in some other German vocabulary and then it becomes even worse. These actors were not even able to pronounce the words or names of the cities correctly. For sakes of authenticity please use real Germans (even if it might just be for a quick voice over) or stick to your guns and do it in your native tongue. Whatever you do, stop pretending! In this movie there was only one woman fluent in the language and she was not even relevant to the plot. What a sad summary. This is one of the worst films I have ever seen. I never saw the other parts and that seems to be a good thing after this wasted 1 hour and 20 minutes. You can call this a Horror movie, but only because everything in it was aweful. Not to use the phrase horrible.

I've watched a couple of the Robert movies, and yes, they are dire, but oddly entertaining. The acting is mostly dreadful, and the storylines are weak. The main gripe for me though, is the complete lack of authenticity with regard to the sets. This film is supposedly set in Nazi Germany, yet the cottage and the train station they used are so obviously somewhere in England. The station signs are in English, the train is English, the interior of the cottage is typically English, the countryside looks English.

Then there's the toy maker's makeup. In order to make him appear old, they have applied heavy makeup to his face. Unfortunately it looks like he has had an accident with some playdoh.

I actually gave up on this half way through as there was no sign of Robert. All in all, simply awful.

As the title says, where was he? Oh right: he appears an hour into the movie for 2 minutes and has 2 scenes. Terrible. The beginning of this movie is 40 minutes too long. What's happening has nothing to do with Robert/toy maker, and doesn't really tie in. All the films in the franchise are awful, but this is the worst so far. Hopefully with how the movie ends they won't make any more.