The Big Sick

What's more important? Your significant other or your family? That can be a challenging question when it comes to your development as a human being. While it doesn't say much about you and how you react to people, it certainly says something about their personality. Should they side with their lover, then they are willing to dodge bullets and rarely care about the opinions of other people. If they chose family, then they have a lot of beliefs in classic values don't want to lose a possible safety net from their parents.

As a white guy from a middle class family, I already have to process my thoughts if I'm going to go against my parents. I can't imagine how much harder that has to be for those from backgrounds with thicker backgrounds. A good friend of mine is marrying into a Mexican-catholic family despite being nonreligious. He's told me that it's taken him a while to win over his brides family and to be accepted into their traditions. Another friend of mine married an African-American, despite some resistance from his family. Today, I know them as one of the most loving families around. The Big Sick examines love and conflicting with traditions.

Uber driver Kumail (played by Kumail Nanjiani) is an aspiring stand up comedian who is on the verge of acquiring his big break by possibly getting a spot in a popular Canadian comedy festival. He also does a one person play about his experience of growing up in Pakistan and the U.S.A. and how he's adopted the American way of living, despite his family staying safe within their Pakistan values. This includes weekly dinners where his parents keep trying to set him up with potential women from Pakistan to lead into an arraigned marriage. This changes during one of his shows when a heckler stops his show.

Aspiring therapist Emily (played by Zoe Kazan) talks to Kumail about his act and the two end up going home. Though they keep claiming they won't do it again, it leads them to date (without Kumail's parents knowing of course). After a fight and her walking out, Kumail gets a phone call about her in the hospital. He agrees with the doctor to put her in a medical induced coma and uses her phone to contact her parents. Her father Terry (played by Ray Romano) and mother Beth (played by Holly Hunter) arrive as the two and Kumail try to help them deal with their daughter. The Big Sick happens to not only be very cute, but this is a nice examination at these kinds of relationships. You usually don't see many interracial kinships (with the exception of this years Get Out), but this one examines a lot of the complications that arise from both families opinions to between the lovers. It even manages to subvert a lot of tropes you typically find in these romance comedies, like how the couple has their "blowout" much earlier, which only makes the situation even more complicated if she recovers.

The main star and scriptwriter, Kumail Nanjuani, clearly has based this off of his experiences (just wait for the end credits). He knows how to juggle the balance of what probably happened and which moments were exaggerated. He also understands just how much he can hurt his family and how high the consequences were. Though his performance as himself was good, the bigger surprise comes from both Ray Romano and Holly Hunter, both actors I haven't seen in a while. If you think Romano is just repeating his character from Everybody Loves Raymond, then you'll be in for a surprise by how sincere his character is. While I can't spoil the best parts, I can be sure he may have earned himself an Oscar nomination.

The Big Sick also dwells into stand up comedy, which is rarely done on film, into new territory I haven't seen. While most deal with trying to be funny, this one seems to care about how much storytelling is involved. As someone whose done some stand up, I can say that the film is accurate and honest about how hard it is to get noticed. While we're not all trying to get on Saturday Night Live, we at least have different perspectives that are worth addressing.

I'll give this ten stuffed giraffes out of ten. I was taken aback with how much I liked this and hope that a lot of people realize that all kinds of love are worth talking about. The biggest sacrifice you can make depends on what you value, and I hope that this movie can help. I can definitely recommend The Big Sick.

The Big Sick was very warmly-received at Austin's SXSW Film Festival. The Big Sick is a superbly original romantic comedy/drama based on a true story of Kumail Nanjiani and his now-wife Emily Gardner; they co-wrote the script together. Kumail stars as himself. It starts from the premise of the inherent difficulties of interracial, inter-religious relationship between a Pakistani- American comedian and white woman in Chicago who face both the normal difficulties of relationships combined with the pressures of Kumail's overbearing, but loving family who demand that he participate in an arranged marriage to a Pakistani girl. Kumail is caught between competing worlds. The situation spins out-of-control when Emily becomes extremely ill and Kumail has to deal with her parents.

The amazing part of this movie is that it deals with deeply serious complex issues, but does so with humor and grace. The screenplay is remarkable and nuanced, but is infused with a comedian's sense of humor that captures the real human comedy that exists in all personal relationships. You will die laughing when Emily's bewildered father turns to Kumail in a hospital cafeteria and asks him, "What do you think of 9/11?" and Kumail responds as a comedian should to such an outrageously stupid question. Ray Romano and Holly Hunter are excellent in the roles of Emily's parents.

While based on a true story, I'm sure parts have been fictionalized to bring the drama and the humor of the events to the screen, but it appears that the basic Romeo & Juliet premise is based on the screen writers' real relationship. The film's ability to balance the deadly serious and the comedic reminds me of the wonderful film 50/50 (2011) which also dealt with a deadly illness with a similar light touch. This beautiful film which deals so well with the complexities of overcoming cultural differences serves as a good anecdote to our charged political climate and especially with the demonization of Islam that has become all too dangerous in this country. I hope it is the breakout comedy hit of the summer when it goes into wide release in July.

Not every indie comedy can buffet jokes about The X-Files and ISIS in practically the same breath, but director Michael Showalter does it with understated ease in The Big Sick. Be prepared to chuckle a bit over the pop-cult references and weep a bit over the heroine's hospitalization. Also be prepared to laugh about arranged marriages, Pakistani style, and a meet-cute that doesn't always bring a smile.

The anchor of this layered comedy is Kumail Nanjiani, not only a subtly smooth stand-up comedian but also a handsome leading man, whose low-key approach to ambition and love puts him in the pantheon of heroes who are believable, self-effacing, and charming. The story is built around his courtship of Emily (Zoe Kazan) based on his wife, Emily V, Gordon, who is co-writer of this warm, sentimental and ultimately realistic screenplay.

Perhaps that realism is just what so endeared me to this dramedy because it fairly depicts the humor of competing cultures and the strains of everyday life in stand-up comedy Chicago and the world. Yet, it is lighthearted rather than grim, with comic toss-off lines that beg for a return to the film to enjoy the ones you may have missed.

You may also return to see the star turns of Holly Hunter and Ray Romano as Emily's parents, Beth and Terry. The two pros can jump from flip to serious in a flash. They alone are a whole film experience wrapped in another film.

The Big Sick is more mood and tone than plot, a quiet reflection of the complicated lives that face more than decisions about sleeping around or telling your family all about your life. Although you may have experienced the cute lover suddenly rushed to hospital in countless other rom-coms, producer Judd Apatow has made sure you will laugh as you enjoy his iconic comedies, now in a higher form than ever, and wax philosophical at the slings and arrows of love in different cultures.

Halfway through this syrupy, heartwarming gushfest, Pakistani boyfriend wannabe tells an edgy 9/11 joke to the very white American father of his comatose love interest: "tragic, we lost 19 of our best men". Silence. There's enough of these gloriously awkward moments in "The Big Sick", to bring much needed levity to the very tired romcom Hollywood game.

Maybe because it's based on the pretty crazy life experiences of comedian Kumail Nanjiani, "The Big Sick" resonates better than most cookie cutter plots. Sure there's sparks, joy, conflict, and tears, but there's also religion, racism, and history. Best of all, there's great chemistry between the leads and the various convoluted familial web players.

Plus Holly Hunter. Yup, Holly Hunter is in this, and of course, she is fabulous. Almost steals the movie. Almost. In fact all the performances are great, including several juicy supporting roles.

Nothing can get in the way of Kumail and Emily's fabulous love story. Hilarious, charming, and sneaky smart.

Romance, cultural conflict, betrayal, compassion, and redemption. All neatly wrapped within the context of a comedic memoir. Michael Sholwater did a superb job directing and the writing collaboration between Emily V. Gordon and Kumail Nanjiani gave the audience a wonderfully intimate sense of how the warmth, power, and growth of a couple relationship can expand and strengthen the bonds of family.

No story or movie becomes great without a superb cast. Again Kumail Nanjiani proved his versatility with an amazingly strong performance (in my opinion award winning). And this movie was not a one man show, Zoe Kazan gave just the right energy to her role, Holly Hunter should get an Academy Award for best supporting actress for hers, Ray Romano was excellent as were Zenobia Shroff and Anupam Kher. This was the best movie I've seen in a very long time and just may be the best romantic comedy I've ever seen.