Harvest Lake

This is not a horror movie. I repeat: this is in no way a horror movie. The only good thing I can say about this movie is the opening scene with the bleached blonde getting entirely butt naked. That's the only noteworthy thing about this movie. I think the director put that scene in there to keep the audience interested. Otherwise, I would have turned it off within 20 minutes. Yes, it was so boring, without the opening nude scene, I'm positive I would have stopped watching 20 minutes in.

At the 30 minute mark, I realized I hadn't seen anything, not one thing, remotely horror related: no suspenseful music, no tense atmosphere, no villain, no one getting killed or disappearing, no blood, no screaming, no running in fear, no victims, nothing, absolutely nothing horror related. I didn't turn off the movie, but I fast-forwarded. I fast-forwarded to the end and still saw nothing horror related. None of the horror elements I mentioned above showed up in the movie at all.

As a result, this movie is mislabeled as a horror. It's a drama fantasy. So if you've been mislead into believing this is a horror movie, either psychological suspense horror with little or no violence, or a gore/exploitation horror, or any other kind of horror, you'll find no horror here. At all.

As far as being a good drama/fantasy goes, it's not. The only thing horror related about this movie is the typical horror plot: unsuspecting young people spend a weekend in a secluded rural area with no cell phone reception so they can have fun with booze, weed, and free sex. The acting is mediocre, at best. The director is flat and uninspired. The cinematography is dull and unimpressive. The dialogue is pathetic (Characters say stuff such as, "Like totally whatever, cakeboy"). And the story is all over the place and nonsensical. Instead of the token black character, we have the token gay character. So there is some heterosexual, homosexual, bisexual sex going on in the movie.

All in all, it is mislabeled as a horror movie. There is nothing horror related in this movie at all. It's a drama/fantasy. But as a drama/fantasy, it fails for all the reasons I described above. Don't bother unless you like wasting your time watching amateur cinema.

Soft core porn disguised as a horror film. A real snoozefest, that had me falling asleep. The entity that came from the abyss, who and what was it? The creature from the black lagoon distant cousin. I clapped in glee as it ended, because it was painful to watch. Slow and boring with no climactic ending. Five friends rolling around in lube, this movie made me feel like I was in one of those sleazy time square theaters from the 80s, I didn't need a shower though, i needed some good sleep. Please don't waste your time watching this film, you might get better joy watching paint dry. Trust me, I'm good at picking movies.

Have you ever watched a movie and asked yourself what was the point? Please don't waste your time watching this movie. 2 hours of my life I cannot get back. It was like watching a porno, but its background story wasn't as good... and it wasn't a porno. IMDb 5 lines of required review text, is too much to ask for this movie.

I have really dug some of Scott Schirmer's other movies/collaborations (Found, Plank Face, Headless, Space Babes From Outer Space, and to a lesser extent, The Bad Man). This one, not so much. Actually, I'm shocked there are some semi-rave reviews here. I will say this much about his movies, including Harvest Lake: They defy expectation. This is apparently his arthouse/sex/Cronenberg film.

The biggest issue I had with this movie is that it's underwritten. What in the hell was this about? Is everything just padding to get to the weird alien sex scene? Scenes (and characters) go entirely nowhere. Well, admittedly, whatever the scene, just leads to sex. If you're expecting another horror movie... you're wrong! I guess I can give this an extra star for rampant sexuality. And Ellie Church is always a highlight in whatever she's in. Yet, I was falling asleep a couple times.

Bad porn? the movie is neither what it suggest neither is it an erotic movie.I fail to understand the point of making this video? because it's not a movie, it doesn't deserve to be called a movie. i suggest watching other films than watching this and if you do, do it on fast forward, you won't miss a thing if you ignore the dialogue.