Pinocchio

"Oh, i just hit my boy of wood with a piece of wood"

Robert Zemeckis' Pinocchio is dire. Most of the CGI characters are hard to look at with Pinocchio being the worst offender. I couldn't imagine buying a toy of this version of Pinocchio, it's rather creepy looking.

The worst part of the movie is the fantasy island part. In the 1940 version, the donkey scenes to this day are terrifying, it really is a trip. Here it's just....nothing. That's probably the best way to describe the movie, a total waste of everyone's time.

Tom Hanks sleepwalks his way throughout the movie, almost as if he's only doing it as a favour to Zemeckis. I had to put the subtitles on for Geppetto as the performance consists mostly of just mutters and grunts. Joseph Gordon-Levitt's Jiminy Cricket doesn't have the originals warmth and humour and grates for most of the running time.

Robert Zemeckis has fallen off big time. He used to create original work such as Back To The Future, Forrest Gump, Who Framed Roger Rabbit. Now he directs remakes of The Witches, A Christmas Carol and Pinocchio. Such a waste.

This may be the worst Disney live-action movie. They really need to stop cashing in on their classics with tripe such as this.

On this viewing, Guillermo Del Toro doesn't have much to worry about with his version of Pinocchio. It can't be any worse than this.

I'm gonna be honest, I do try my best to tolerate most of the live action remakes. We only got Jungle Book as the only one worth watching, everything else are either decent or just okay. Now the movie is released, I can already see a good reason people will debate this and the 2019 Lion King. The 2022 Pinocchio remake may not be the worst Disney Plus film, but this could be the worst live action Disney remake to date. There are Pinocchio movies out there that do try to find a way to tell the story of the character well. But this is more of a recycled film from the original 1940 one. Despite it does have some of the performances that's fateful to the original film, it had a weak execution with a poorly written story, mediocre characters, overly dark setups, and awful looking visuals. The one thing I'll say the visuals got right is with Pinocchio himself. But for the most part, they can be out of place and most of the designs try way too hard to make animal characters realistic. I mean, we already gotten Ugly Sonic in Chip and Dale. What more do you want to do all that in, Disney Plus? Of course as a painfully pointless live action Disney remake, I recommend to skip this one and stick with the original film. But you know what, let's all be thankful at least we're getting the one by Del Toro at the end of the year. When that gets released, I can guarantee it will be the one you'd want to watch instead. I think Disney should take a break from remaking their classic animated films before they embarrass themselves the more that are made.

I watched the film and it was not that bad but it wasn't that good either. Some of it was cringe to be honest. I didn't like Honest John and Gideon in this version. Honest John sounds nothing like the 1940 version. The Coachman song was fine and so was the other songs. I found the song the Blue Fairy sang good and the part where Pinocchio tells his father that he loves him was wholesome too. But there's another thing I don't like..I don't like how they changed it to hint that Geppetto had another son before Pinocchio and a wife. I don't know, it's cool to think that Geppetto had a wife but the son thing is just very not realistic. It sounds like a fanfiction. That wasn't in the 1940 version and I think it shouldn't have been there. I think one of the points of the 1940 version was that Geppetto was happy to have a son for the FIRST TIME. Also, the lesson is kinda a bit blurred now because Pinocchio didn't really make bad choices besides going to the puppet theater and lying. The lesson was not to make bad choices, and Pinocchio seems more wise in this version. I also liked the idea of the story changing a bit, but it shouldn't have been changed too much. They also should've at least got a real boy for Pinocchio turning into a real boy. This was also a bit boring. This is just my opinion, I recommend watching so you could see if you like it or not. I don't think this is absolutely horrible, but I can see why people hate this.

I have set myself certain expectations with regard to Disney productions these days. Disney seems to be on this trajectory that many of us do not like, yet we cannot avert our eyes from what's coming.

The moment Pinocchio was released, I knew this film would be "Disney-fied" (in the modern sense). I suppose certain elements from the 1940 film would need a modern take to appeal to younger audiences, an with that, I note some positive points from the film:

1. The character designs were good. The designs captured the look of the original film, whilst giving them the modern look that modern films demand. In general, the CGI I thought was immaculate and gorgeous.

2. Certain parts of the dialogue made me chuckle. Naturally, dialogue would have to fit the modern context and I thought it was refreshing to hear modern dialogue in a film like this (at times).

3. The voice acting was spot-on. I especially liked Pinocchio and Honest John's voices.

Now of course, this film has many flaws:

1. The story lacks the soul that the original had. It felt more like watching a new spin-off film, as opposed to watching a Pinocchio film.

2. I was surprised how the film removed key elements from the original story. I don't see why this was even necessary.

3. The Blue Fairy just didn't do it for me. It felt very "by the way".

Overall, I think credit should be given to the cast and CGI team.

Though I think the director seems to have lost his way with his string of mediocre films of late.

Even if a movie was made by Disney 20 years ago, it would have meant +1 point for many people.

Then Disney grew up and lost his soul.

The Pinocchio movie is not a successful production, despite all the successful actors and actresses in its cast, despite a lot of effort. Because there is no soul in the movie.

The only thing that comes to my mind after watching this movie is; was to watch the Blu-ray of the 1940 version, again made by Disney.

I hope the Netflix/Del Toro version is better.

I'm tired of big companies destroying my childhood memories.

Still, I can't pass without bowing, Benjamin Evan Ainsworth is also very talented in dubbing.