The Ivy League Farmer

I have seen this movie twice, both times against my will, and both viewings were somehow worse than both the prior and the last.

They say that H.P. Lovecraft was one of the fathers of modern horror, but Ivy League Farmer might just have him beat. Ivy League Farmer succeeds in lowering expectations at every turn, with its horrific acting, disgusting cinematography, and revolting plot. I almost threw up watching this movie. I would say that Lovecraft, Poe, and perhaps even Stephen King would be proud of such a horrific piece of media that could've only been conjured by otherworldly spirits with the evil determination to bring forth a cataclysmic era of darkness and death, but I feel like that they would stray away and be ashamed that such horrors could even be conceived by human minds.

1/10 wouldn't watch again.

This movie truly blew my mind, and it is one of the most impressive movies I have ever seen. It accomplishes this by being one of the most basic movies I have ever seen. I find it truly astonishing that the main character had chemistry with every other character including his mother but did not have any with his "love interest". There was only one original idea throughout the whole movie, every last character is a simple trope. I enjoyed how predictable this movie was. It gave me less thinking to do which I appreciated considering I lost brain cells watching this movie. It also had a harsh warm filter overlayed throughout the entire movie which made it look like it was edited by a 2016 instagram girl. This movie was so forgettable I can not recall all of the horrible events but all I remember is the feeling of overwhelming dread that I felt while watching this movie. I gave the 10/10 not because the movie was good but instead because the movie was so bad I had a great time laughing at the low quality and bad story.