Sasha's Reviews > Shoot Me in the Face on a Beautiful Day

Emma Murray's sophomore novel gets deep into the head of a traumatized woman and her boyfriend, who is not great. It took me a while to read because I had to go hug my kid after every chapter, but it was worth it!

The flag gets planted early, in a scene where a serial killer breaks into a home and finds his next victim with her baby on her chest. "Put him on the floor," he tells her. That scene sets the tone for the book, tonally and thematically: it's gonna be a rough ride.

Birdie's own son died in an accident that she's internalized as her fault. Murray does a subtle job of setting up the details of that incident: Birdie was being shitty in that crucial moment, so you can see why she's got it twisted, but the accident was in fact just one of those things. Could happen to anyone. You cannot keep your eye on your toddler all the time.

But her guilt destroys her self-esteem and she ends up in an abusive relationship, which Murray describes in awful, granular, excruciating detail: how she ends up this way, why she stays, how she justifies each incident. The big achievement of this book is that Murray gets you to understand how someone can be damaged enough to stay with a monster. It's sophisticated and careful work, and it's deeply empathetic. You know that old cruel "Why don't you just leave" cliche? Murray wants to show you the answer to that question.

Meanwhile, women are getting serial killed! Do you think these two storylines will come together? I do!

Shoot Me in the Face on a Beautiful Day is gnarly stuff. Remember that "Put him on the ground" scene I talked about earlier? If you don't think you can handle that scene, this isn't the book for you. But I think it's great work from a big talent; I was riveted and horrorstruck all the way through. Except for the parts where I was running off to hug my kid.