pope Archives - Weekly World News

POPE ANNOUNCES CATHOLIC CRYPTOCURRENCY – VATICOIN!

November 1, 2019 by S.G.P Piercer

VATICAN CITY – The Catholic Church follows Facebook, Monsanto, and the American Dentist’s Union as the latest to announce its foray into digital currencies. VatiCoin is coming! The platform, set to launch this Christmas, is “absolutely necessary for the continued convenience to our parishioners around the world,” explained Vatican spokesperson Cardinal Riciclaggio Denaro. “Despite our … READ MORE

THE POPE BLESSES VAMPIRES IN ANNUAL TRADITION

October 29, 2019 by Tap Vann

VATICAN CITY – Pope Francis spent a good part of the day in the annual Halloween tradition at the Vatican: the Blessing of the Vampires. The annual vampire blessing began in the late 19th century by Pope Leo XII. People Leo decided that All Souls Day should include a blessing for vampires who would be … READ MORE

POPE FRANCIS RESIGNS!

April 4, 2014 by Frank Lake

Pope Francis shocked the world today. Just as soon after Easter was over… he resigned.

POPE JOINS HELLS ANGELS

June 17, 2013 by Hideaki Tailor

Pope Francis blessed thousands of bikers at an open air mass in St Peter’s Square – and then joined the Hells Angels.

BAT BOY WILL BE THE NEXT POPE!

February 27, 2013 by Frank Lake

On the same day Pope Benedict XVI had an emotional send-off in St. Peters Square, it was announced that Bat Boy will be the next Pope!

POPE MOVING TO HOLLYWOOD

February 17, 2013 by Frank Lake

Pope Benedict XVI shocked the world with his plans to reitre on Feb. 28. He shocked the world again today – he’s moving to L.A.

POPE RESIGNS ON OBAMA'S ORDERS

February 11, 2013 by Tap Vann

Pope Benedict XVI announced he would resign Feb. 28. President Obama has ordered him to do so.

GOD CREATED THE BIG BANG

January 6, 2011 by Tap Vann

VATICAN CITY – Pope Benedict XVI announced today that God created the Big Bang.

JERSEY SHORE SECOND SEASON

February 2, 2010 by Reginald Cunningham III

SEASIDE HEIGHTS, NJ – Jersey Shore is being brought back for a second season. The Pope declares Snooki Polizzi the Patron Saint of the Jersey Shoreline.

NIKE SIGNS GOD AS SPOKESMAN

February 24, 2009 by Foxington Delaware

LOS ANGELES, CA – Spokespeople for Nike Corporation announced yesterday the signing of God as the centerpiece of the ‘Thou Shalt Just Do It’ campaign.

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