The Disco Mermaids (Robin M. - Jay A. - Eve P.)

Then came the tears...

...followed by a loving headlock.

My phone started vibrating the moment I left the gym. “Robin! You’re home? I thought you were still camping.” “Nope. We’re back.” I needed to tell Robin that night about the book news, but that meant finding a way to get from Point A (the gym) to Point B (Robin’s house) to Point C (my house)...yet my wife needed the car.

The solution, as well as my favorite three-letter palindrome: Eve!

We parked a couple of houses away and snuck around tall bushes so Robin wouldn’t notice us till the last minute. We wanted to capture her surprise on film and knew she’d figure it out the moment she saw us. Why else would two Disco Mermaids surprise the third Disco Mermaid at her house with a bouquet of flowers?

“Hey, guys,” Robin said. “Good to see you. Come in.”

Eve and I looked at each other, shrugged, then followed her inside. Her husband was there, along with her father-in-law, and her four-year-old sun who yelled, “Garter snake!” (I don’t know if that’s important, but it sure was cute.)

I handed Robin the bouquet and Eve lifted the camera up to her eye. Robin said, “You guys are acting weird.” I told her to read the card. Her son yelled, “Velociraptor!” (Isn’t he adorable?)

Robin read the card and…how come it took Robin and Eve so freaking long to figure it out?!?! I wrote the same thing on everyone’s card: Thank you for helping my dreams come true.

Hello! My dreams?

She must have read the card at least a dozen times before it finally…well…check out Photo #1. Then she jumped three feet into the air, which would have looked great on film but the flash wasn’t ready and I thought she might hurt herself if I asked her to do it over again. I explained the details, which had developed even further since I told my wife, Eve, and my parents the night before. While listening, Robin cradled her chin in her hand and slowly shook her head, adding another few tears to this When I Told… series.

Followed by, “Garter snake!” (So cute.)

Then the three Disco Mermaids went downtown to top-off the night with hot coffee and cushy chairs. Robin and Eve worked so hard to get my manuscript into a ready-to-submit form, from brainstorming scenes to moral support to full critiques, that it truly feels like a group project. And I think the same can be said for their manuscripts which I can’t wait for you all to read!

The best quote of the night, though, we didn’t find out about till later. After we left her house, Robin’s father-in-law told her husband, “It’s been a long time since I’ve seen people that happy for each other.”

Okay, ladies…who’s next?

- Jay

My mom works nights at a nursing center. She often doesn’t wake up till the sun’s gone down and my dad is very protective of her sleep. But…I was gonna wake this mutha up!

My dad tried to stop us. “Don’t go in there,” he said. “Trust me, Dad. It’s okay.” “Your mother is sleeping. She works tonight.” “She’ll want to be woken up for this.” My dad looked down at the bouquet of flowers in my hand and slowly arched an eyebrow. I nodded for him to follow and he didn’t say another word.

(FLOWER FUN FACT: I originally wanted my wife to hold the bouquet so they wouldn’t immediately think of my book. But my wife is much smarter than I am. “What do you think will pop into their heads if I’m the one holding the flowers?” Yep, that’s right…baby! So I kept the flowers with me.)

I cracked open the door and whispered, “Mom?” She asked, “Urugunatimeizit?” “I’m gonna turn on the lights,” I told her. The lights came on and my mom propped a pillow behind her back. “What is it?”

I handed her the flowers, plucked the tiny card from its holder, and asked my dad to read it. He read it to himself, gazed over his glasses, and asked, “Did you sell your book?” My mom looked up at me with eyes begging me not to continue any further if this was all a joke. Lines of tears were already forming below each eye, waiting for the only answer that would let them fall.

I took a deep breath, nodded, and my wife started taking pictures.

My dad shook my hand, which turned into a hug. My mom rocketed out of bed and called her sister. “Sher, guess what!”

The rest of that night was spent calling grandparents and friends and…

What? Oh, you thought I forgot about telling Robin? What kind of a friend do you think I am? It was one of the biggest nights of my life and Robin happened to be camping three hours away with her family (now who’s the best friend!). Sure, I could’ve tried calling her to tell her over the phone. But as you now know, these things are much more fun in person.

Plus, the pictures turn out better!

- Jay

Then came the details...

...followed by another listen to my agent's two messages.

After my wife and I spent some reflective time in the park, we went to a flower shop and bought three beautiful bouquets for some very beautiful people. The first person on our list…Eve.

Earlier that day, after I’d already learned about the first two offers on my manuscript, Eve and I spoke on the phone. It was extremely difficult to pretend I was interested in what she had to say. I mean, yes, I cared…but I was so afraid of blabbing my secret if we kept talking. Then the plan for the entire evening hit me. I told her about a great documentary I’d borrowed from the library that I knew she would love. I asked if she would be home around five so I could drop it off. “If I’m not here,” she said, “just leave it on the porch. I might be out running.” “If you’re not there,” I said, “I’ll wait on your porch till you get back…not that I don’t have a life or anything.”

But when we arrived, Eve was still there. She opened the door in her running clothes and I handed her the bouquet. “Oh…okay…Thank you,” she said. Then she noticed the card poking up from the flowers:

Thank you…
for helping my
dreams come true.
Love, Jay

“Um…I’m not sure what…You’re welcome?”

There was a long, long, looooooong and awkward pause. She apparently didn't feel like guessing why I was bringing her flowers, unannounced, with my wife right there!

“I…sold…a…”

And that’s when Eve, expertly photographed by my wife, fired off several rounds of “Holy ----!” Then she sat down, put her hand over her heart, and listened while I told her everything that happened. The most heartwarming thing she said that night (after her vocabulary expanded a bit) was, “It’s weird, but it feels like I just sold my own book.”

And that’s why I love being a Disco Mermaid.

- Jay

Coming tomorrow…When I Told My Parents.

...then came the huggin'!

Years ago, I promised my wife that when I sold my first children's book she'd be the first to know. So when I spoke with my agent on my lunch break and found out about the first two offers, I had to keep my mouth shut for four entire hours…and I work with a bunch of librarians. Aaargh!

Later that day, when my wife and I got off work, she wanted to go running. I asked if she'd be willing to run at a certain park with a lake. She said okay. Just by random chance, that park was also where we got married. I asked if we could walk over to our wedding spot before she started running. She said okay. We stepped into the kissin’ spot and I told her, “Four years ago…right here…I told you I do. Today, I want to say Thank you.” She said, “Thank me? For what?” I took a deep breath. “For helping me get my book published.”

“What!?” Her hands pounded my chest and she took a step back, tears already forming. I coughed a few times and nodded that it was true. Then she spent a few minutes hunched over, crying into her hands…which was great because it gave me enough time to pull the camera out of my pocket, move around to get the best lighting, and shoot.

Then we spent some time chasing each other around the gazebo, leaping benches like gazelle, and telling anyone passing by that I sold my first book. Hey, it’s never too soon to start marketing!

Days later, when everything calmed down (relatively speaking), my wife told me it was the happiest day of her life so far. The fact that she could say something like that is only one of the reasons my book will be dedicated to her.

- Jay

Coming tomorrow...When I Told Eve!