Brian Vs. Movies

That is an interesting promo poster, isn't it?  Just how large is that candelabra?  Comparing it to the man who has thrown it at what appears to be cigarette smoke, I would estimate at least three feet tall.  Unless, of course, the "uninvited" are miniature people.  I was also intrigued by the quotation in the top: "From the Most Popular Mystery Romance since 'Rebecca'."  Now, I've seen Rebecca, and it hasn't aged all that well --- from a story perspective, that it; the direction is fine.  Does that mean that The Uninvited will also suffer from old age?  That is a definite possibility.

I was already familiar with the plot of The Uninvited before I sat down to watch it.  My lovely and talented wife co-starred in a local theatrical production of the play, which was based on the same book as the film.  With the element of surprise gone, I was free to study the film as if this was my second or third viewing.

The Uninvited opens with Roderick (Ray Milland) and his sister, Pamela (Ruth Hussey), losing control of their dog while trespassing on private property.  Being fairly reckless with their terrier, the pair apparently opted to not bring a leash with them and, when the dog saw a squirrel, it was all over; the dog chased the suspiciously slow squirrel into a lovely but empty house, as a piano played in the soundtrack, a la Tom and Jerry.  Many people would be embarrassed enough to leave quickly, but not Roderick and Pamela.  They decided to give themselves a tour, and they fell in love with the house.

"Yes, house...I must murder my sister so we can be alone..."

And what luck!  The house is for sale!  What follows is a powerful drama as the siblings go through the long, arduous process of purchasing a new home, complete with offers, counteroffers, inspections and closing costs the fastest house sale in history.  They make a ridiculously low bid, it is accepted, and Roderick returns to London to finish business, while Pamela moves in as soon as the furniture arrives.

How low was the bid?  Instead of dollars, they used day-old herring

Once Roddy moves in, though, he starts to notice some weird things; one room in the house is inexplicably colder and sadder than the rest of the house, animals won't go near the room, and the sound of sobbing can be heard late at night until dawn.  Pammy knew all this before Roddy showed up, but opted to not mention it to him.  No big deal.  The house they sunk their life savings in just happens to be haunted.  But why is it haunted?  And what does it have to do with the previous owner's twenty year-old granddaughter, Stella Meredith (Gail Russell)?

Hint: it involves dramatic running

The Uninvited stands out from other mid-1940s movies for a few reasons.  Most notably, this story uses a ghost haunting as a legitimate plot device.  To the best of my knowledge, that makes it the first (at least in Hollywood) drama to not have the haunting be an elaborate ruse.  This is a ghost story, plain and simple.  Of course, there were not many special effects back then, so we don't see much of the ghost.  I was impressed that they showed it at all, even as a barely visible smoky image.  That said, The Uninvited is clearly uncomfortable with its subject matter.  Every time the film started to take advantage of its creepy mood, the tension was undercut by comic relief or Roderick trying to seduce Stella Meredith.  While that may be a product of the times --- how often did Hollywood really try to frighten its audiences in the 40s? --- that still doesn't excuse comic relief that deserves to be accompanied by a wah-wah horn riff.

The acting in The Uninvited is decent, but there are no great performances here.  Ray Milland is likable enough in the lead, but his character is too shallow for a quality leading role.  Similarly, Ruth Hussey is okay as Milland's sister, but her character has some serious logic lapses --- why didn't she mention the haunting to her brother earlier? --- without adequate explanation.  Gail Russell was better as a pleasant, but naive, love interest for Milland, but her role wasn't very deep.  Donald Crisp was pretty over-dramatic as Stella's grandfather.  Cornelia Otis Skinner gave the most interesting performance in the cast, as the painfully proper (and probably evil) Miss Holloway.  I found it interesting that the filmmakers opted to hint that the character was gay; not surprisingly, she is cast as a bit of a villainess.

Only lesbians keep portraits with such well-defined busts

This was the first film to be directed by Lewis Allen, and it remains one of his most widely recognized.  Personally, I was not impressed with Allen's direction at all.  I thought the acting varied between unnecessarily campy (Milland's seasick scene and all the humor) and overly dramatic.  Every time he managed to make a scene somewhat tense, he undermined it.  It doesn't help that ghost stories do not age particularly well, especially ones that involve little to no outright horror.  I thought he did a decent job starting to make the film scary, but he never went that extra step for a satisfying conclusion.  Ouija boards and rooms filled with a menacing evil are decent starting points, especially in 1944, but Allen always opted for the least disturbing way out of those scenes. 

N...O...T...S...C...A...R...Y...A...T...A...L...L...

I think it is telling that The Uninvited is one of the few classic horror movies to not have a recent remake.  The premise is fine --- the house is haunted and there is a family secret --- but the way the story is told removes a lot of the drama.  This is a ghost mystery, where the main characters try to decode a twenty year-old drama to put the ghosts at rest.  That means that there is really no action or villain that can be overcome in a satisfying manner.  Instead, the main characters wind up having a lot of exposition in their dialogue to explain what is happening in the film, because it can't be shown.  Sure, the acting is decent and the movie looks pretty enough, but the story is lackluster.

With the prevalence of television, movies, video games and trolling the interweb, it is easier than ever for me to waste my free time away with little or nothing to show for it.  As such, I have made it a habit to read a little bit every day, oftentimes from my excellent collection of noir.  I have read The Big Clock a few times, and it is one of the more interesting twists on the cat-and-mouse game in the genre.  Naturally, the suspense of the chase and its unique twist makes this an obvious choice for a film adaptation.

Ray Milland, keeping his eyes open for cats and mice

The Big Clock is the story of George Stroud (Ray Milland), the editor-in-chief of Crimeways magazine, which is just a small part of Earl Janoth's (Charles Laughton) publishing empire.  Janoth is a demanding boss, seemingly devoid of human emotion, save his fondness for words that end in "-ways;" his other magazine all have that in their title to brand them, like Fashionways, Futureways, and probably Sideways.  Cue rimshot. 

Earl Janoth: charming

Thanks to the conflicts between his home life (where he spends too little time) and his professional life (where he gets fired for insisting on taking the vacation he has postponed for four years), George finds himself in the doghouse with his wife, Georgette (Maureen O'Sullivan) and fired by Janoth.  What's a newsman to do?  If you answered "drink to oblivion with the wrong crowd," you're only partly right.  The "crowd" George finds himself getting blotto with is actually Janoth's mistress, Pauline (Rita Johnson), who is interested in blackmailing Janoth.  After a crazy night on the town where nothing naughty happens, George bids Pauline goodnight, right as Janoth is coming to visit.  George recognizes Janoth, but Janoth cannot identify George thanks to the lighting in the apartment complex.  In a fit of jealous rage, Janoth murders Pauline.  But a man of his stature need not turn himself in to the authorities over the death of such a trivial person, right?  Janoth re-hires George to head a Crimeways investigation into Pauline's murder, with explicit instructions to find the mysterious man Pauline was seen around town with that night; this needs to be a Janoth Publishing exclusive, so the police cannot be involved either.  Obviously, George is in a tough spot.  He has been hired to track himself down, doubtlessly to have a murder he didn't commit pinned on him.  Obviously, George has to figure out who did the killing and prove it, but without sacrificing himself before a powerful and apparently lawless man.  The chase is on!

News magazines: as glamorous as you imagined

The acting in The Big Clock is solid, but a little dated.  While I liked Ray Milland's character at the start of the film --- it's hard to dislike charming, intelligent and quip-friendly characters --- I didn't particularly care for his portrayal of a man on the run.  He went from fairly suave to obviously shifty-eyed in a matter of minutes.  Granted, I would feel off if I realized I was being hunted by a murderer, but Milland's anxiety was conveyed in a heavy-handed manner.  The most frequent example of this is whenever someone around George makes an observation about their unidentified suspect that accurately depicts George or his actions on the night before, Milland's eyes dart from side to side, a la Pong. 

Does this look like a guilty man?

Charles Laughton was more enjoyable as the detestable Janoth.  Paunchy, ugly men do not necessarily convey strength or power on the big screen by default, but Laughton was quite impressive and believable in his role.  I thought Marueen O'Sullivan was fine as George's wife, although I find it hard to believe that any two people sharing the same basic name would ever agree to kiss each other, much less marry.  Sometimes, in films like this, the estranged wife seems ridiculously ignorant of context, but I liked that her Georgette was portrayed as an intelligent and strong woman.  You should also recognize Harry Morgan (of M.A.S.H. and Dragnet fame) as Janoth's merciless thug.  You might snicker at that, too.  Elsa Lanchester added some comic relief as a professional painter, although I would argue that the last thing this film needed was comic relief. 

"It's my artistic interpretation of your colon health"

I wasn't terribly impressed with John Farrow's direction, but he had some inspired moments.   I especially liked the first scene with Janoth, as the camera subtly moved around the room, like the eyes of an anxious Janoth underling.  Unfortunately, there were many more choices I was less impressed with.  The Big Clock is another classic film noir that is told in an extended flashback; I understand the desire to get the audience immediately interested in what happens with the plot, but I hate hate hate the presumption that quality storytelling isn't enough to compel an audience to sit tight and see what unfolds.  I can understand the extended flashback if it gives a character the excuse to narrate (as in Double Indemnity), but the opportunity is wasted in The Big Clock.  With George scheming to save his own neck, this could have been a great opportunity for clever narration --- I would have loved to hear his reasons for assigning certain people to certain tasks in the Janoth manhunt --- but instead, we are stuck with some lackluster bookend narration.  I also felt that the additional humor was uneven and distracting from any suspense the main plot was trying to build.  I also didn't care for the ending, but it was in the novel that way; I would have preferred some deviation from the source text, but I've seen stupider mindless devotion to the source.

I wonder who is supposed to be evil?

While not the strongest film noir entry I have reviewed to date, the acting talents of Ray Milland and Charles Laughton are more than enough to make this watchable.  Sadly, there are too many missed opportunities to make The Big Clock film as good as the book.

I like to think of myself as a bit of a film buff.  No, really, I do.  But, despite my vast knowledge on the subject, every so often I find an acclaimed movie that I have never seen or heard of.  When I first learned that Love Story earned seven Academy Award nominations, including Best Picture, Director, Actor, Actress, Supporting Actor, and Best Screenplay, I assumed that this was one powerhouse of a movie.  Hell, it was up against M.A.S.H. and Patton in all the major categories that year, so being nominated has to mean this film is good, right?  Right?

From the very first overdubbed line of dialogue, you know what kind of movie Love Story will be: "What can you say about a twenty-five-year-old girl who died?"  Hopefully, that her life story was made into a slapstick comedy.  No?  Well, this looks like a downer.

Oliver Barrett IV (Ryan O'Neal), a Harvard student, is trying to persuade the female student bouncer at the Radcliffe library to let him borrow a book so he can study.  Why any library has somebody working the door to prevent the entrance of readers is beyond me, but I'm not an Ivy League sort of guy.  The bouncer keeps giving Harvard boy grief, but is simultaneously flirting with him in the bitchiest way possible.  You know what I mean, insulting his intelligence and then saying something along the lines of "If you're so smart, why aren't you asking me out? ...Not that I would say yes."  That sort of crap.  Ladies, trust your Uncle Brian: don't flaunt your crazy bitchiness before you get to know a guy (or girl).  In the interest of fairness between the sexes, fellas, don't flaunt your stupidity early, either.

Well, the bouncer's tactics worked.  The bouncer, Jennifer Cavelleri (Ali MacGraw), and Oliver start dating.  Oliver is richie rich, with one of Harvard's buildings named after his family, but he is uncomfortable with his wealth.  Whenever he gets the chance, Oliver IV: A New Hope tries to defy his father, Oliver III: Revenge of the Sith (Ray Milland), whether by refusing to apply to law school or by dating a girl he knows his father would disapprove of, based solely on social status.  Jennifer comes from a working-class background, and her father (John Marley) is beyond proud of her, although she maintains a first-name relationship with him.  This is a love story, so the two obviously fall for each other and, as the opening lines announce, she dies young.  The end.

How long did that take you to read?  If it was less than ninety-nine minutes, then I just saved you a lot of time you might have wasted on this movie.  If that didn't save you time, then you should really re-enroll in preschool.  I wasn't a big fan of this movie, but it's hard for me to pinpoint why.  I felt that the script was trying too hard to be clever with its dialogue, for starters.  The words "goddamn" and "bullshit" are thrown around like they're party favors, but instead of sounding natural (like Samuel L. Jackson in Pulp Fiction) or shocking (The Exorcist or Steve  Martin's famous scene in Planes, Trains and Automobiles), they sound forced, like a ten-year-old trying to subtly prove how cool he is.  I really don't think the script gives any reason for these two to get along.  They're always bickering at each other --- I know that can be a form of flirting, but their barbs are the sort that can really dig in and fester.  And the script is stupid, too; well, either it's stupid, or the 70s were...I can believe either.  Oliver gets the news that Jennifer is dying from her doctor.  You would think doctor-patient confidentiality would prevent the doc from telling this terrible news to anyone but Jennifer.  Apparently not.  And when Jennifer finds out, she's not upset.  Well, she's upset about dying, but not about that breach of trust.  Maybe that's just proper perspective.  Whatever.  I don't know, maybe it bothers me that the script expects us to sympathize with a petulant, insufferable hyper-elite heir and his sarcastic (but not funny at all) lover.  I'm not trying to be classist, mind you, but I think the main characters in a love story should be...well, lovable.

I didn't even like the acting or direction in this movie.  I thought Ryan O'Neal did a great wounded puppy imitation, but as far as human emotions went, I wasn't impressed.  I will give him credit, though, that he can make his lower lip quiver, on the verge of tears, quite well.  Ali MacGraw (as you might have inferred) didn't impress me as the sarcastic soon-to-be-dead-girl.  The most astounding aspect of her performance is that she doesn't ever appear to be sick, even a little.  I've seen prom dates that looked worse than her on her death bed.  It's not like she died from an arrow to the head; she had a terminal illness, probably a form of cancer, and it bothers me that the filmmakers felt the need for her to be beautiful up to her last breath.  Because you only love what appears to be pretty, people.  Let that be a lesson.  With such a dislike for the acting in this movie, I of course am not a fan of the direction.  As far as storytelling goes, Arthur Hiller did a pretty good job, but enjoying this movie absolutely hinges on liking the characters, and I couldn't do it.  I will give credit where it's due and say that O'Neal and MacGraw had pretty good chemistry, even if I don't see any reason for their characters to have spoken to each other after the first scene.  On a side note, this is Tommy Lee Jones' first film role, in which he delivers maybe two lines.  So at least something good came out of it.

Love Story is famous for the line "Love means never having to say you're sorry."  It is used twice.  The first time is after Oliver and Jennifer have a big fight; immediately regretting whatever he said or did, Ollie runs around town, trying to find her and eventually finds her on their front stoop.  There, mouth-breathing, tear-stained, and snot-coated, Jennifer tells Oliver the line and everything is better.  Later, Oliver uses it as a brush off with his father.  Classy.  Call me a romantic, but I don't think love has anything to do with apologizing when you do it right.  And shouldn't a movie called "Love Story" do it right?

I cannot believe that this movie was nominated for so many (seven!!!) Oscars.  This is the worst film I have ever seen that was nominated for an Oscar; to be fair, I haven't seen Norbit.  This makes Nicholas Sparks look like a well-balanced writer of action, adventure, comedy and drama by comparison.  I hate Sparks because he manipulates emotions, but this was just inept and artificial in every way.  Ugh.  Just thinking about this movie in detail is testing my gag reflex.  The amazing part (to me, at least) is that this movie only made me angry.  I'm a soft touch, generally, when it comes to movies that pull on the ol' heartstrings.  I have heard this movie called a four- or five-hankie tear-jerker, but all it got out of me was a dead stare, with rage slowly bubbling up underneath.  The only thing keeping this movie from zero stars is the fact that the story was told in a comprehensible fashion.  Love Story, I hate you.