Tale 1: Do you know why cat's have nine lives -- or did you ever wonder why people say they do? This is the story. A very hungry cat entered a house one day and found a plate of nine fish that were going to be eaten for dinner by the nine starving children who lived there. The cat was feeling a little selfish that day and ate up all of the fish in nine quick bites. With no food on the table, the nine starving children died of hunger the very next day, along with the cat who died from eating WAY too much. When the cat went up to heaven and spoke with God, God was so angry with the cat that he threw him out of heaven and made him fall for nine days all the way back to earth. To this day, the cat still holds the nine lives of the starving children in his belly, which is why he must die nine different times before he will stay dead.

Tale 2: My daughter woke me around 11:50 last night. My wife and I had picked her up from her friend Sally’s birthday party, brought her home, and put her to bed. My wife went into the bedroom to read while I fell asleep watching the Braves game.”Daddy,” she whispered, tugging my shirt sleeve. “Guess how old I’m going to be next month.””I don’t know, beauty,” I said as I slipped on my glasses. “How old?”She smiled and held up four fingers. It is 7:30 now. My wife and I have been up with her for almost 8 hours. She still refuses to tell us where she got them.

Tale 3: Little Emily vanished last year. Now they’re pouring new sidewalks in my neighborhood, and I’ve found her name in the wet cement, written in remembrance. But it was written in reverse. And from below.

Tale 4: Last night a friend rushed me out of the house to catch the opening act at a local bar’s music night. After a few drinks, I realized my phone wasn’t in my pocket. I checked the table we were sitting at, the bar, and the bathrooms, and after no luck, I used my friend’s phone to call mine. After two rings someone answered, gave out a low raspy giggle, and hung up. They didn’t answer again. I eventually gave it up as a lost cause and headed home. I found my phone lying on my nightstand, right where I left it.