When you first hear the concept for this game, the natural response is to go "...I'm sorry what? That sounds so stupid". And, when in a drunken stoop you decide to pick this game up as a joke, you go "oh this game is fun asf actually". That's the power of Umamusume- its ability to get you 100% invested in something as ridiculous as racing anime horse girls who are also pop idols. Ladies, gentleman, and enbies: the greatest game of all time. The game is so silly, so utterly unashamed of its ridiculous premise that it allows the player to get just as invested in said goofiness, and that is a genuine feat. But on top of that, the game has a genuinely enjoyable gameplay loop with surprisingly deep mechanics and scenarios that allow for hundreds of hours of gameplay. BUT THATS NOT ALL DEAR READER: for you see, as the observant among you have noticed, I said these girls aren't just racers, but they are also pop idols! Your placement in the race also dictates where your Uma is placed in the post-race concert! Whether that be a backup dancer, a supporting singer in second or third place, or the coveted lead singer position reserved only for those who come in first place. And these concerts are so fun, its a quick 2 minute music video featuring a variety of songs, all with different voices for each Uma, and their own unique choreography and VFX. Truly the pinnacle of video games.

Of course the game isn't without flaws, and the most glaring one is that it is a live service gacha game. The game has the usual exploitative daily login rewards and microtransactions designed to keep your attention ad infinitum, and stingy currency rewards combined with limited time banners to get you to spend real money. I'll never like these business practices and I highly recommend anyone who gets this game to do the same thing I did and never spend a cent on it. The game gives you a lot of currency at the start, enough to get a few good Umas and support cards and start racing, even if the drop rates are kinda ass. But I'll give credit where its due: the game giving you a bunch of credits up front is appreciated, and it gives a viable path forward for FTP players. Just don't let the FOMO get to you, yeah? Appreciate what you get and don't spend actual money. Overall, the game is a really fun and memorable experience despite its crumby business practices. I don't really play it anymore, but its still a game that I'll look back on fondly (I still listen to the songs constantly tho). This game is umazing!

P.S. - Vodka best Uma. Fight me.

haha... run on little horsey...

no pink spark proc...? haha......

UMAPYOI UMAPYOI