andrew_wyke
Joined Dec 2015
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andrew_wyke's rating
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andrew_wyke's rating
Being a Polonia movie I had almost as much fun looking at all the little bits on the edges of the movie like the sign in the bathroom of the AirBnB they rented for the luxury lakeside home of Arianna that passive aggressively tells you not to flush anything but toilet paper down the toilet they have already had to pump out the septic tank at a cost of 900 dollars or the business title on the door of the Massimo Modeling Agency that clearly doesn't say Massimo Modeling Agency but something Financial Services, the top word is blocked by the wall and I spent a good five minutes advancing it one step at a time trying to read it. It has some of the fun weird low budget energy you come to expect from a Polonia movie but it isn't as weird as Camp Blood Clown Shark or Motorboat. It is tries to recreate the feel of a giallo on a shoestring budget and does a good job but has too small of a cast even for its 82 minute runtime or enough red herrings to avoid you figuring the movie out well before it ends. If you are a Polonia fan it is cool to see him trying different ideas that don't involve a shark but I almost would have liked it more if the killer reveal was revealing it was a shark all along.
Silent Night, Bloody Night 3: Descent continues the sequel's story of Angelica Zacherly (this time portrayed by Tina Kraus) as she's locked up in Bradbury Asylum, a corrupt mental institution led by director Issac Cole, played by the witty Lloyd Kaufman. If you're looking for a satisfying conclusion to the trilogy I wouldn't get your hopes up, as it delivers a confusing and disappointing ending to what Angelica had to endure. Some supporting characters were good and should have had more screen time like Kyle Rappaport and there was too much of the Walter character. Very random newscaster and blogger posts that were too irrelevant and distracting whilst watching. Don't expect much from this before you view it.
Honestly, this movie is horrible. Many of the actors seem to simply read their lines -- you can see their eyes moving while looking down or off-camera, clearly reading the text. The plot barely makes any sense. Many of the scenes look as though they could just be improv'd. The dialog is really bad. In addition, the costumes/dress and makeup are also ridiculous -- Francesca spends the entire time in a ridiculous wig, half the scenes feature actors who are sweating profusely, and Phillips spends the film dressed in a pair of odd shorts and a button-up white shirt that's about 3 sizes too large for him. Finally, the film clocks it an almost an hour and 45 minutes, which is about half an hour too long for the amount of story that's actually in the movie. Honestly, unless one wants to be supportive of Phillips or Francesca, there's really no reason to watch this.