bernardlcrawford
Joined Apr 2015
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Reviews35
bernardlcrawford's rating
I had no expectations upon discovering this um, er, uh film? The first 15 minutes my laughter was non-stop. To pull it off all they needed was for the director to engage his friend's 6 year old daughter to design and create the costumes. They are darling! I did find the 17 scenes of the dog men smelling one another's butts gratuitous. I want a DOG MAN!!!!
I actually found this movie incredibly amusing. It is SO bad on SO many levels, you will find yourself laughing at the dialogue, actions and horrendous make-up. This is perfect for Rifftrax to Riff on. MST3K would have loved it. There is SO much to make fun of in this movie it is frightening.
During the viewing, look to the one, so called soldier in the back wearing shades and is bald. The the camouflage make up he is wearing consists of a thick black line drawn around his head and one line drawn straight up from the front. At a distance, his head looks like the head of a penis. I laughed my ass off.
Technology has been pushed back 50 years thanks to this one. Of course the alien has to be some horrid, cheap knock off of the Predator. Stan Winston is rolling over in his grave!
The premise? A 5 man Navy Seals team has fallen to aliens. They know 1 is alive (ONE mind you). Upper command states no rescue but a dumbass group of idiots think it is transactionally copacetic to have 5 more solders die to save one. As soon as they reach that soldier, he dies! LOL.
ENJOY the BADNESS!!!!!!!! Love all that smoke! And laser fire that comes from nearby ground squirrels!
During the viewing, look to the one, so called soldier in the back wearing shades and is bald. The the camouflage make up he is wearing consists of a thick black line drawn around his head and one line drawn straight up from the front. At a distance, his head looks like the head of a penis. I laughed my ass off.
Technology has been pushed back 50 years thanks to this one. Of course the alien has to be some horrid, cheap knock off of the Predator. Stan Winston is rolling over in his grave!
The premise? A 5 man Navy Seals team has fallen to aliens. They know 1 is alive (ONE mind you). Upper command states no rescue but a dumbass group of idiots think it is transactionally copacetic to have 5 more solders die to save one. As soon as they reach that soldier, he dies! LOL.
ENJOY the BADNESS!!!!!!!! Love all that smoke! And laser fire that comes from nearby ground squirrels!
I have a co-worker that views a youtube channel that exclusively watches the most horrid of movies. He recommended to me "Suburban Sasquatch". My room mate and I found that completely laughable. I did not even have to view the Rifftrax version of it to get a multitude of guffaws. It was similar to "Plan 9 From Outer Space" so bad in every aspect that it makes one laugh.
He recommended this movie. I assumed it would be in the same in its incompetency level as the other, I was utterly incorrect. I watched 15 minutes of this atrocity and not one laugh.
This is what I reference as a "Purgatory" or "Limbo" movie. A production so completely absent of positive facets, it should not exist. We are being drowned in such movies these days. Everyone believes they can act, write scripts and film, they cannot and this is proof of it.
Cinematography is horrid. Much shot out of focus. Night scenes are badly done. These are the kind of movies that induce headaches. No proper framing of shots.
Acting is non-existent. I saw that one actress had over 100 roles until I saw all were "Uncredited". Can one make a living in films just being a background person?
Sound: At the 15 minute mark we encounter an interaction between a young man and woman. I was raised on a farm in an agricultural area. We had crickets. They were not SO loud that you had difficulty hearing what a person is saying to you standing a scant 2 1/2 foot from you. ADR anyone?
Nothing to see here. It is a waste of your viable life span. I do not understand how SO many of these POS movies are being made. Everyone has to be in complete and utter denial of the fact they are making a piece of excrement.
He recommended this movie. I assumed it would be in the same in its incompetency level as the other, I was utterly incorrect. I watched 15 minutes of this atrocity and not one laugh.
This is what I reference as a "Purgatory" or "Limbo" movie. A production so completely absent of positive facets, it should not exist. We are being drowned in such movies these days. Everyone believes they can act, write scripts and film, they cannot and this is proof of it.
Cinematography is horrid. Much shot out of focus. Night scenes are badly done. These are the kind of movies that induce headaches. No proper framing of shots.
Acting is non-existent. I saw that one actress had over 100 roles until I saw all were "Uncredited". Can one make a living in films just being a background person?
Sound: At the 15 minute mark we encounter an interaction between a young man and woman. I was raised on a farm in an agricultural area. We had crickets. They were not SO loud that you had difficulty hearing what a person is saying to you standing a scant 2 1/2 foot from you. ADR anyone?
Nothing to see here. It is a waste of your viable life span. I do not understand how SO many of these POS movies are being made. Everyone has to be in complete and utter denial of the fact they are making a piece of excrement.