CDiablo
Joined Nov 2002
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Reviews31
CDiablo's rating
This vanity project involves 4 people. 2 men(one being the director), two women......and the director/co-star spends plenty of time with the women naked.
The majority of the movie is spent with the director begging some guy to do a girlfriend/wife swap. It's the majority of the dialogue.
We can all sympathize and/or empathize with someone being hit on by a drunk person, they get rejected and they just won't drop the issue. You know; trying different angles and lines but it ain't happening........That is what this guys dialogue mostly resembles. It's so embarrassing.
Then there is 2 very good looking naked ladies being good looking and talking about their college history.
A little vampire stuff is revealed and director begs other dude more but also wants him to join the vampires.
Thats it.
One of these days I hope to see director Dallas King(known to friends as DK I would hope) at a bar. I'll buy him a shot and give him a nod, sending the message;"I see what you were doing there ya rascal." in regards to my first paragraph.
Or maybe it's just financed by big polygamy, I don't know but this movie is DK at his finest and is essential DK filmography viewing.
The majority of the movie is spent with the director begging some guy to do a girlfriend/wife swap. It's the majority of the dialogue.
We can all sympathize and/or empathize with someone being hit on by a drunk person, they get rejected and they just won't drop the issue. You know; trying different angles and lines but it ain't happening........That is what this guys dialogue mostly resembles. It's so embarrassing.
Then there is 2 very good looking naked ladies being good looking and talking about their college history.
A little vampire stuff is revealed and director begs other dude more but also wants him to join the vampires.
Thats it.
One of these days I hope to see director Dallas King(known to friends as DK I would hope) at a bar. I'll buy him a shot and give him a nod, sending the message;"I see what you were doing there ya rascal." in regards to my first paragraph.
Or maybe it's just financed by big polygamy, I don't know but this movie is DK at his finest and is essential DK filmography viewing.
Last Shift is a very basic movie that hits very basic beats that you have seen 1,000 times before.
Cop is alone in a "last night before closing" police precent building. Noises happen, spooky phone calls, "not sure if real" visions happen, things happen behind the character to specifically to scare the home viewer, in between this is some blatant exposition. If you have seen the Insidious/Sinister/etc movies you have seen most of it done better.
Probably the most absurd part of this is how dumb the main(and basically only) character acts, especially being a police officer. I've seen police call in backup to help on a traffic violation done by an elderly person, and this one won't call for it after being assaulted. I spent the whole movie (internally) yelling at the main character to stop doing dumb stuff and it takes you out of the movie.
Only real positives of the movie were the occasional decent makeup effect, and a few good, tense horror scenes which were greatly outnumbered by the dumb and the cliche. This one is a dud.
Cop is alone in a "last night before closing" police precent building. Noises happen, spooky phone calls, "not sure if real" visions happen, things happen behind the character to specifically to scare the home viewer, in between this is some blatant exposition. If you have seen the Insidious/Sinister/etc movies you have seen most of it done better.
Probably the most absurd part of this is how dumb the main(and basically only) character acts, especially being a police officer. I've seen police call in backup to help on a traffic violation done by an elderly person, and this one won't call for it after being assaulted. I spent the whole movie (internally) yelling at the main character to stop doing dumb stuff and it takes you out of the movie.
Only real positives of the movie were the occasional decent makeup effect, and a few good, tense horror scenes which were greatly outnumbered by the dumb and the cliche. This one is a dud.
Kolobos doesn't really have much going for it. I watched it because I was in the mood for a gore movie and thats about all it really has that is good and even then not great.
The story follows a mix of conventional slasher tropes in an unconventional setting that might have been somewhat unique for it's time but been done many times since. Then there is the ending.
The ending(and certain scenes in peppered throughout the movie) made me feel like the movie was either too short or went bad with test audiences so they made this absurd B plot which added 20 minutes to the overall movie that led to a very unsatisfying end. You could remove it all and add a somewhat different ending, one in line with the rest of the movie, and no one would know the difference. Maybe this is a spoiler but the ending is VERY unsatisfying and can't answer the questions that the viewer naturally thinks of.
The characters are mostly insufferable and talk/act as if it was written by someone not of society. Maybe it's just the 90's aesthetic and 90's nature of the characters, but I lived through the 90's and nobody I know was like these folks. Maybe it's a case of an old person trying to write "hip" characters.
Another negative is the "slasher" with embarrassing makeup effects.
It's shot well and the gore is good but thats really all it has going for it. Any tension made by the film is ruined by the ending.
Don't watch this one, you will be upset that you did when the ending begins.
The story follows a mix of conventional slasher tropes in an unconventional setting that might have been somewhat unique for it's time but been done many times since. Then there is the ending.
The ending(and certain scenes in peppered throughout the movie) made me feel like the movie was either too short or went bad with test audiences so they made this absurd B plot which added 20 minutes to the overall movie that led to a very unsatisfying end. You could remove it all and add a somewhat different ending, one in line with the rest of the movie, and no one would know the difference. Maybe this is a spoiler but the ending is VERY unsatisfying and can't answer the questions that the viewer naturally thinks of.
The characters are mostly insufferable and talk/act as if it was written by someone not of society. Maybe it's just the 90's aesthetic and 90's nature of the characters, but I lived through the 90's and nobody I know was like these folks. Maybe it's a case of an old person trying to write "hip" characters.
Another negative is the "slasher" with embarrassing makeup effects.
It's shot well and the gore is good but thats really all it has going for it. Any tension made by the film is ruined by the ending.
Don't watch this one, you will be upset that you did when the ending begins.