SpecialAgentMaxwell

Wow! I haven't seen a movie this good since Caligula! The lead actress (Lacey Toups for those not in the know) is a cut above the rest. It was very cool to see Forest Whitaker do something small and indie like this for a change. As for the story, if I didn't know any better, I would have thought Michael Mann had something to do with the script. Every single detail of the Gang's criminal enterprise is scrutinized under an incredibly watchful eye. It makes sense though. The Champagne Gang is based on a true story and it shows. The sense of reality is a prevailing feeling throughout the movie. This is a must-see and most definitely a must-own. Awesome!!!

I've seen worse movies. Of course, they were black screens dubbed in languages I couldn't understand, broadcast on the concrete walls on my prison cell...and reversed. Jack was the kind of movie that makes you contemplate suicide. While it would be a permanent solution to a temporary problem, at least you would have died knowing you'd done something with your life...like avoiding this movie. My favorite part? When Robin Williams, in his star turn as the title character "Jack," purchases pornography, alcohol and tobacco for his ten-year-old comrades. I laughed myself silly thinking about Jack Palance doing one-armed push-ups at the Academy Awards(TM); at least that Jack didn't make me want to put a cigarette out on my eyeball. I would rather be a republican at a Barbara Streisand concert than ever see this movie again. I think, as Americans, we should urge our president to use this film at Gitmo, defending freedom and fightin' terra'. Don't mess with Texas!

Whacked? is one of those movies that had the possibility to be the next Anaconda in terms of quality but simply came up short. The problems with the movie can not be readily explained but I have a sneaking sensation it might have something with most people's inability to look at the lantern jawed leads face for any extended period of time without wanting to immediately regurgitate the last seven days worth of stomach contents. On a brighter note, I talked with one of the crew members that worked on this Oscar-snubbed movie and they said that star Patrick Muldoon would constantly refer to Sprague St. in Spokane as Spra-Goo. I guess we know who failed English at Bayside High. Too busy stealing Kelly from Zach, right? Jerk!