Plot

Wealthy businessman Zsa-zsa Korda appoints his only daughter, a nun, as sole heir to his estate. As Korda embarks on a new enterprise, they soon become the target of scheming tycoons, foreign terrorists and determined assassins.

In 1950, arms dealer and industrialist Anatole "Zsa-Zsa" Korda narrowly survives an assassination attempt. While unconscious, he enters the afterlife, where a divine court judges his worthiness to enter Heaven. Knowing he cannot run from assassins forever, though he has nine sons, Korda makes his only daughter his sole heir, and tries to mend his relationship with her, Catholic novice Sister Liesl. He asks Liesl to quit the Church and take over his business. Liesl's adoptive parents sent her away to a convent at the age of five. Korda and Liesl have a testy relationship; he is rumored to have murdered Liesl's mother, although he denies this. Liesl also meets Bjørn, a Norwegian entomologist and Korda's tutor/administrative assistant.

Governments around the world want to stop Korda's unethical business practices, and also his causing wars and peace when it's contrary to their aims. An opportunity arises when Korda stakes his fortune on a risky scheme to overhaul the infrastructure of Phoenicia with slave labor. Government agent Excalibur conspires to drive up the price of building materials, which threatens to bankrupt Korda. With Liesl and Bjørn in tow, Korda meets with, and attempts to swindle, his investors. He deceitfully asks Californians Leland and Reagan to sign a contract increasing their financial contribution without telling them about the change, blackmails French nightclub owner Marseille Bob, and threatens to kill East Coast businessman Marty in a suicide bombing. Although his investors are enraged, Korda worms his way out of each scenario. However, the investors agree to cover only 50% of the budget shortfall.

During the trip, Liesl and Korda explore their odd relationship. After taking a bullet for Marseille Bob, Korda meets Liesl's mother in the afterlife; she tells him that he is not Liesl's father. Korda realizes that all he had to offer his family was money, not love. In addition, during his confrontation with Marty, a guilt-ridden Korda admits he knew Liesl's mother was having an affair with his estranged half-brother Nubar. To get back at her, he faked a story that she was also having an affair with Nubar's assistant, which prompted Nubar to kill her. He also admits he still does business with Nubar, who has also invested in the Phoenician scheme. Liesl is outraged at her father's amorality, but agrees to continue helping him so that she can send Nubar to jail.

In a last-ditch attempt to avoid asking Nubar for help, Korda offers to marry his cousin Hilda, an heiress to the Korda armaments fortune. She accepts his proposal but refuses to increase her investment. On the flight back home, saboteurs destroy Korda's plane. The wreckage reveals evidence that Bjørn is a spy working for Excalibur's consortium. However, he agrees to switch sides, as he has fallen in love with Liesl. Korda explains to Liesl that their family has been dysfunctional for generations. Disturbed, Liesl resolves to quit the family business and return to the Church. A group of guerrillas rescue the party and take them home, where Liesl's mother superior dismisses her from the order, explaining that she is too materialistic for the religious life.

Korda's investors gather at the Desert Oasis Palace hotel to witness a presentation of his scheme. Korda, Liesl, and Bjørn finally meet with Nubar, who announces that he is withdrawing his entire investment. Nubar denies being Liesl's real father and reveals that he was the one trying to kill Korda all along, reasoning that life is a game of "who could lick whom". Nubar tries to kill Korda in a brawl, but Korda defeats him.

Korda decides to change his ways: he converts to Catholicism, pays his workers, and throws his entire fortune into completing the Phoenician scheme, reasoning that finishing a worthy project will give his life meaning. Although he is bankrupted, Liesl is impressed and agrees to accept him as her father. The two retire to a simpler life running a small bistro. Hilda has her brief marriage to Korda annulled and gives back her wedding ring. Korda loans the ring to Bjørn, who proposes to Liesl; she accepts. At the end of the day, Liesl and Korda play cards together as a family.