Arctic Armageddon : USS 598 Dallas

The first moment they show the navy sub that plays a central role in the movie, they show what looks like an auditorium, with a vaulted ceiling, not even a pretense of the tight spaces of a real submarine, and the cheesiest mock-up of radar stations I've ever seen. Then the Commanding Officer calls a woman "Commander" and "XO" (Executive Officer) who is wearing the proper insignia of a First Class Petty Officer (E-6), which is beyond stupid. It seems like they did it as a joke to see if anyone would notice. Every moment looks like something completely different from a submarine CO giving orders to his crew.

All the other comments about the acting are really true. The acting is Mark-Hamill-as-Luke-Skywalker-in-the-first-Star-Wars-movie bad. I can't understand what inspired the 7 out of 10 rating, but it's certainly one of the worst movies you should spare yourself the trouble of watching.

The actors are awful, the scenario is awful, the special effects are awful, everything is awful, to the point that they almost match the worst film ever filmed.

However, I enjoyed it. A lot. I laughed at the indigent play of the actors, of the green screen effects, at the scenario which merits an igNobel Prize in Physics, everything is so low-cost that Ryan Air becomes Air France face to this inept film.

However, I enjoyed the hairstyle of the actress playing Dr Wood, I will ask my wife to copy that haircut.

Finally, I would like to thank the director who perpetrated this film. I spent an enjoyable moment by laughing in front of my TV.

I only gave this movie a third star because the opening scene was intriguing and promised an interesting story. Unfortunately, the promise was never fulfilled. I don't know who deserves the most blame (director, script writer, actors, or editors or a combination of all of them) but the plot was beyond ridiculous. Almost all the actors appeared to be reading their lines, not living them. There were so many holes in the sequence of events that you could drive a Mack Truck through them. The special effects were repetitive to the point of boredom. The same goes for the dialogue. I do have to say that I enjoyed several laughs, although I'm sure it isn't what the creators of the film were aiming for.

This movie falls under my top lousiest category from the very start. First of all this has to hold the record for worse acting in a movie. I felt like I was watching a bunch of robots playing humans. No doubt the worst politically correct movie I've had wasted 24 minutes on. (And the most famous drag queen in history was one of my friends in high school. Our Spanish teacher got him his first gig, while we were still in high school in 1964. None of us found that strange, in the 1960's, so that is not the problem.) Would I recommed this movie to my worse enemy, you betcha! Oh, I hope some of the actors survived this armageddon.

Having been in the military I tend to get a little critical over technical inaccuracies. This movie was one of the worst I've seen. On the submarine, haircuts, uniforms, rank structure, and submarine features were so far off to be laughable. The submarine's executive officer (XO) wore the rank of a first class petty officer a mid-level enlisted grade ... not an officer. The helmsman wore the rank of a seaman, but referred to as a petty officer. It was inferred that the submarine had to frequently surface to exchange air. Torpedoes were launched through what appeared to me the missile launch tubes. Decisions at the Pentagon were being called by the Secretary of Homeland Security rather than the Secretary of Defense. I could go on an on but I'd advise skipping this one unless viewing for the comic effect.