Queen Crab

My main reason for seeing 'Queen Crab' was it being part of my "seeing low budget films out of curiosity" quest. Expectations were conflicted, with the premise being somewhat intriguing if silly and with the potential to be a guilty pleasure. With it not looking particularly good and the low rating, part of me was nervous.

Watching 'Queen Crab' taking all that into account, with conflicted expectations and taking it for what it is, the film certainly could have been far worse and there are definitely worse films out there, of its genre, kind of film and in general. Is it an irredeemably bad film? No. Is it a good film? Not even close. Did understand what 'Queen Crab' was going for, that it seemed to pay homage to 50s creature films and it was clear for it to not take itself seriously, but felt that it didn't execute either very well. And this is coming from someone who gave the film a chance with no intention to dislike it with prejudice, and saw the whole thing.

The effects are not great at all with some awkward movements and cheapness, not blending well often with the environment, but they could have been far worse. While the intention to not take itself too seriously is to be applauded, 'Queen Crab' too often gets on the wrong side of silly absurdity.

Story-wise, it is ridiculous with a lot of draggy pacing, as a result of paper thin, often unevenful and over-stretched story-telling, and clumsy and far from tense or suspenseful action. The acting is a bad mix of overdone and bland, no real standouts while the photography is relatively drab, the ending is far-fetched and the dialogue is cheesy and ham-fisted.

For all those faults, 'Queen Crab' is not a complete mess. The titular creature has a little menace and is not too goofy. The sound isn't too intrusive or too much of a drone.

'Queen Crab' has the odd fun moment, it doesn't confuse and at least it was clear what tone and approach the film was aiming to go for, that cannot be said for a lot of low-budget viewings seen recently.

Overall, very lame with a lot of huge flaws but at least didn't insult my intelligence. 3/10 Bethany Cox

A small freshwater crustacean mutates into a giant monster crab and attacks a small town! This silly send-up of 1950s sci-fi knows exactly what it is and never takes itself too seriously. The acting and screenplay is amatuerish but everyone appears to be having fun. The mix of low-level CGI and Harryhausen-style stop motion effects works perfectly here. Look... this is not a big budget summer blockbuster like Jurrasic World or Kong Island. It's just a fun little sci-fi creature feature that was made by Brett Piper his crazy friends. Take it for what it is and you'll enjoy it.

That's good because a garbage plate is a Rochester New York dish. It has a low budget, super cheesy, and good for what it is. I had no problem with this 1950's type of cheese fest. Other horror movie with the same budget takes themselves way to serious.

If I had to guess, I would say this was a SyFy Original, but I don't know that for sure.

I love b-movies, but if you're going to make a b-movie, it has to be compelling to make up for everything else--the meh acting, poor special effects, and typically meh plot or story. These don't always show up in b-movies, but all are here.

This is not a terrible movie, it's just not a good one, nor a terribly compelling one. Unfortunately, it wanted me to take it seriously, which I think is part of my problem with it. Worse, the pacing feels slow. There were some moments of fun, but I felt like I had to wait too long for something interesting to happen.

Not enough gore for my tastes, no nudity, no babes in bikinis--these elements are not requirements, but audiences who watch these movies tend to expect these things. Michelle Simone Miller does briefly appear at the very end in a tank top and underwear, and we get a scene with Katherine Metz in a bikini. That's it for the babe factor, which is a shame, because Miller in particular is gorgeous.

Not the worst thing ever made, just not interesting.

1-3 Don't waste your time 4-6 Good 7-9 Great 10 Outstanding.

The film poster should be sticked next to "trash" in the dictionary