The Profane Exhibit

The ten year wait is over, but how to review this extreme horror anthology? Let's start with the obvious. Extreme horror anthologies usually suck. Partly this is true of The Profane Exhibit, but then there are also moments (really just moments) of almost brilliance. For most of the directors, these little snippets (most are about ten minutes) do not present their best work or even their most extreme work. Overall it is better than I expected (yes I expected very little), but it's nothing special and falls way short of the 10 year hype. Two snippets stand out for watchable storylines and three for their unique viewer experience (yes there is an overlap). This film is probably only for a select audience. I'd say probably a 6/10 for an extreme anthology.

A series of dark shorts from top international genre directors.

The Good Stor(ies): The Hell Chef-Desperate to get back at her boyfriend, a woman and her sister band together to teach him a lesson by letting her sister's culinary skills go to use in preparing the boyfriend as a special meal for them. This was a rather entertaining segment that has a lot to like about it. The wacky scenario that goes far more over-the-top than even the expected standards here due to the creators involved make for a highly enjoyable time as the sisters gleefully and enthusiastically cut the bretrayer to pieces in a ritualistic manner to ensure the full brunt of every cut is still viable. Some of the excessive storytelling is a bit unnecessary going into the backstory of the younger sister and what drove her to do this with her sister as that brings about a confusing ending, but the carnage and bloodshed raise this one significantly.

Tophet Quorum-Following the recovery of his dead daughter, his uninformed wife gives birth to what she suspects are twins only to learn the dark truth when she's told only one made it through birth. This was a fine segment that comes off pretty nicely. The gruesome early discovery of the dead body and the scenario itself with the pregnant wife giving birth herself and the mysterious circumstances surrounding the birth offers a fine starting point for the gradual reveal of what's going on. The interactions with the crazed beings living in their underground tunnels and the final reveal of the cult are rather dark and disturbing when their plan comes about, but it's all rushed and could've used more time to breathe as this more than anything could've been the one to turn into a feature-length adaptation.

Goodwife-Living a double life in secret, a man's affairs are soon discovered by his faithful wife who sets out to punish him for the indiscretions he's committed against her. Overall, this was one of the more intriguing segments here. The involved story offers up some decent twists and turns with the double-life as a serial killer kidnapping, torturing, and sexually abusing women which includes how he treats her as the polar opposite that gets her going when the truth is revealed. The confrontation scene offers up the carnage with the brutality in what's going on appearing suitably graphic and dark to go along with the twists featuring here, although it's again way too rushed with it appearing unnatural how everything comes together as the brief running time means it rushes through things without letting it breathe.

Sins of the Father-Hoping for some closure, a man goes to extreme lengths to convince his geriatric and senile father to relive the night he abused his son. This was a pretty solid if not exactly horrific segment. Featuring more of a traumatic center at the heart of everything as he spends the entire setup trying to persuade his aging father to go through his failing memory to recount officially the night he was abused, the setup tells a pretty harsh tale that unravels nicely involving the various coercion techniques to bring the memories out. As visually interesting and brutal as the incidents appear, the fact that none of it is scary or chilling does manage to come about here which is the main drawback to this one.

Manna-Taking up a new club, a man finds that he's become the latest resident in a bizarre performance piece involving the regular performers of the club who brutally torture and kill their clients. This was a decent enough one-note segment that ends on a whimper. It's simply all about the gore and torture here with the scenes of the guy getting carved open, dismembered, and sliced open to the point of having his innards removed in detail as this looks great and squirm-inducing. Beyond that, the dialogue-free running time and lack of context make this simply a one-note piece about the carnage on display as everything else is so confusing and jarring that it's hard to get a handle on the meaning behind it all so nothing about what's going on makes any sense. This works best as an intro piece to a greater exploration of what's going on but as a brief standalone it's hard to get into it.

The Bad Stor(ies): Mother May I- Living in a high-end monastery, a pair of teens trying to make their way through their headmistress' crazy demands and brutal punishments for failing her teachings, realizing she has her own demons driving her along. This was a pretty underwhelming enough way to get things going. The central setup is there with the promise of some religious-horror shenanigans involving the lifestyle that's being preached, the environment that the girls are subjected to, and the vague hints of something demonic influencing everything due to the visions of some grotesque being watching over everything that happens. However, it's all over so quickly it's barely registering what's going on, it just seems to end without anything being resolved or paid off, and there's far more room to explore things here that never get resolved, leaving this highly unsatisfying.

Basement-Trying to enjoy their lives, a couple resort to extreme measures to ensure their daughter continues to live in their basement to be his dirty plaything. This was a rather dark and disturbing effort but it doesn't have much else going for it. The subject matter on display and the means through which it's achieved come about quite well here with the initial preparations for the meal and the parents going through their routines before then serving up an intriguing scenario that's quite rather unexpected. By the time the final reveal comes, it's shocking on its own but then there's just a useless epilogue that serves to start a different story altogether but then ends without developing it or going further which leaves this disappointing and jarring for what's going on.

Bridge-In a remote section of Italy, a pair of children decide to hold court over a sacred bridge in the community and threaten anyone who dares to use it. This was an absolute waste of a segment with very little purpose for being here. The dialogue-free running length ensures it's a complete mystery as to what's' going on, there's nothing here that makes any sense as we don't know what anything is, and the whole thing feels like a punchline to something where we don't see the setup to so it's barely registered. With no creepy visuals, no gore, an ending that never registers as one beyond realizing the transition is happening to the wrap-around, and a brief length on a bloated roster of talent, this could've easily been removed without incident.

Mors in Tabula-After visiting a family in need, a skilled surgeon finds that his techniques have left a strong impression on the family when they realize the extent of his work. This was a generally pathetic entry that ultimately means nothing important to the film as a whole. There's nothing scary about what's going on beyond the graphic scenes of the surgery being committed on a child, yet once you look past that there's nothing here. Again, it feels like a punchline lost in context without much of anything to help build it up, it ends before anything remotely interesting happens, and has far more questions than anything due to its brief running time so with no gore and plenty of questions its involvement is quite suspicious.

Rated R: Extreme Graphic Violence, Graphic Language, Graphic Male and Female Nudity, and strong themes of incest and sexual assault.

Each year I loyally attend as much screenings and international premieres at the Brussels Festival of Fantastic Films as possible. Each year there are pleasant surprises as well painful misfires, of course, and each year there is also one – and usually just one only – film that becomes my absolute must-see priority! For the 2014 edition, this simply couldn't have been any other film than "The Profane Exhibit". The seemingly dark and ultimately sinister anthology effort assembles no less than a dozen of the most eccentrically & controversially talented directors of the horror genre from the past, present and future. Just look at the names! And if the names don't immediately ring any bells, click on their names and browse through their repertoires. As a die-hard fan of extreme and worldwide horror, I appreciate the work of all directors involved, but I was particularly looking forward to the contributions of Ruggero Deodato, Sergio Stivaletti and Marian Dora. Deodato is the founding father of Italian cannibal movies, and thus a genuine horror deity. Stivaletti is the genius special effects wizard of practically all the greatest Italian directors, but he also directed two terrific movies himself already. And Marian Dora is mostly known for the extremely sick and grueling "Cannibal"; an uncompromising re-working of a true German crime case. The other names were more than fascinating as well, including Richard Stanley ("Hardware"), José Marins (the notorious "Coffin Joe" movies) and Nacho Vigalondo ("Time Crimes"). The only two that I personally don't admire very much are Uwe Boll and Ryan Nicholson, but considering their brute and unhinged filming styles they also definitely belong in this project. In short, "The Profane Exhibit" looks like every horror fanatic's dream come true, even more so than "The ABC's of Death" or "Masters of Horror".

But alas, alas… "The Profane Exhibit" unexpectedly turned out to be the biggest and saddest disappointment in many years, and to be quite honest, I still haven't fully recovered from how bad it actually is, even though it has been 3 days since my viewing now. It's fairly simple to see what went totally wrong here, in fact. The whole film, the entire project, is utterly soulless. None of the directors (except maybe for Uwe Boll) used even 10% of their skills and talents, and probably just considered their short stories as an annoying side activity. The different chapters, approximately ten minutes each, are gory and depraved for sure, but they completely lack content, atmosphere, coherence, suspense and even proper common sense. In case you're exclusively looking for brainless bloodshed and perversity, you might still enjoy "The Profane Exhibit", but if you expect a minimum of structure and/or quality story-telling, you will feel cheated. For what concerns the directors I looked forward to, I can be very brief and bitter. Ruggero Deodato's segment isn't worth mentioning, Marian Dora's tale was downright incomprehensible and Sergio Stivaletti's chapter was watchable but weak. With the exception of Nacho Vigalondo's contribution, which is mediocre at best, I can't even bother to mention the remaining short stories. As much as it hurts, I wish to prevent fellow genre fanatics from watching this embarrassing trash, or at least forewarn them not to expect too much.