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DVD Review

Metal Tornado

Directed by: Gordon Yang

Cast: Lou Diamond Phillips, Greg Evigan, Nicole deBoer

Running Time: 1 hr 30 mins

Rating: PG

Due Out: May 22, 2012

Plot: A failed attempt to harvest energy from solar flares creates a tornado in Pennsylvania that has a magnetic appetite.

Who’S It For?: If you don’t like science, this movie might be fun for you. It has tornadoes and people talking about magnets, but that’s just fluff in the larger scheme of Metal Tornado. The content of the movie is fine for families, though the amount of attention it will garner from anyone in your clan is not guaranteed.

Movie:

An old roommate of mine constantly tries to defend M. Night Shyamalan’s The Happening as an intentional B-movie, saying that the laughably corny film was made to be just that. Apparently, this is a defense that Shyamalan has used himself.

Directed by: Gordon Yang

Written by: Andrew Erin and Jason Bourque

Featuring: Lou Diamond Phillips, Nicole de Boer, Greg Evigan, Sophie Gendron

I live in an extraordinary time; I have had the rare privilege of being born at the exact right moment that would allow me to watch the rise, and fall, of Lou Diamond Phillip’s stardom.

Ever since I saw him at his height in Young Guns (almost as brilliant as the sequel, Young Guns II), just a scant few years after his portrayal of '50s rocker Ritchie Valens, I have secretly been saddened by his waning acting career.

I think it was 1999’s Bats that killed it. Or was it Walter Hill’s Supernova? Either way, it has never been the same. He’s gone the way of Judd Nelson and C. Thomas Howell. His latest starring role in Metal Tornado is perhaps his greatest B-movie role,...

Tornadoes are inherently evil things, so imagine how much unholy damage one could cause if it were made out of metal. Below you’ll find a trailer for the Lou Diamond Phillips vehicle “Metal Tornado”, a film which features the “La Bamba” star locking horns with a vortex made of scrap metal. How can one made stop such a thing from wreaking havoc on the entire planet? I’m not sure. Then again, the man did save us from “Bats” and a particularly evil “Alien Express”, so we shouldn’t write him off just yet. I’ve got faith in you, Lou Diamond! You’ll figure things out! Here’s an unnecessarily thorough synopsis: When a ground-breaking industrial experiment goes awry, the energy overflow manifests into a deadly swirling magnetic field! Workers and scientists scramble for safety as it quickly overwhelms the plant. This magnetized funnel begins consuming anything metallic...

It's true that often times I am the last person to know about things. Dexter, Jelly Shoes no longer being in style, the fact that tin foil is not microwave safe....I could go on for hours. But this. Not being clued into the fact that there is a new disaster movie called Metal Tornado coming out and that it is in fact about a tornado that is metal? That is just cruel.

In case you are as clueless as I was here's the skinny. Metal Tornado is about a metal tornado that tears through our world and devours everything in sight. It's one of those ridiculous disaster movies where there's really too much power on one side of the scale. It's like when we decided that a killer shark wasn't powerful enough and so we made a movie about a giant killer shark that can tear the Golden Gate Bridge in half.

Imagination Worldwide has recently finished production on the sci-fi thriller Metal Tornado. The film brings the "destructive power" of magnetic tornadoes on Mercury to Earth. That is not a good idea. Soon, disaster strikes as the tornadoes gain energy and size, outside of the laboratory. A release date has not been announced, but fans of natural disaster thrillers can have a look at the early film art. Expect Metal Tornado on television soon, with more details on this production swirling below.

The synopsis for Metal Tornado is here:

"When astronomers discovered the phenomena of magnetic tornadoes on the planet Mercury, they were amazed by the destructive power of these gargantuan solar-fueled magnetic fields…but they never imagined witnessing the catastrophic forces in their own backyards.

Samuel Planck is head of the Helios Project — a high tech facility tasked with storing and converting solar rays into an endless supply of renewable energy.