Humpday

I came here after watching it yesterday to write a review of Humpday, but when I found a few excellent reviews already here I changed my mind. Now I've changed my mind again. Although existing reviews express many of my problems with this movie, they do not adequately cover the most important issue.

Although reviewers who liked this movie have correctly noted that it is not about being gay--not even about "going" gay--this movie does present a vivid and disturbing picture of most straight men's attitude toward male homosexuality. To them, sex between two men is deeply repugnant, grossly unnatural and disgusting. The prospect of themselves touching another man sexually is so disturbing that they pee in their pants and act like terrified babies. Is that funny? Not to me. Is seeing it enacted brilliantly on screen enlightening and liberating? Not to me. I've seen it all my life.

I'm going to assume (because it's almost surely true) that the vast majority of Humpday's ardent fans are women, both straight and lesbian, and probably some straight men who consider themselves liberated and enlightened enough to laugh at the foibles of their less enlightened brothers or even at themselves in their own pre-liberation pasts. I suppose I have to allow also for a few self-loathing gay men, because I know they're out there. I'm going to address this review to those women and straight men; the self-loathing gays I'll pray for.

The fact that at least one of the men in Humpday is himself relatively enlightened does not make the movie's offenses any less offensive; it makes them worse, because it also shows how shallow and unreliable that enlightenment actually is. Those straight men who under ideal conditions are wonderfully tolerant of male homosexuality run away in disgust if it gets too close to them personally. It's not unlike the old liberal hypocrisy of advocating racial integration as long as they don't try to move in next door or marry our daughter.

It's never wrong to expose hypocrisy or shallow virtue. It's never wrong to shine the light of truth into the dark, nasty recesses of fear and hatred in all our lives. Humpday does that brilliantly. For the billions of men who are like the two in this move, watching it could be a blessing of incalculable value. And I would never want to deprive the long-suffering and universally abused female majority of any opportunity to see how fundamentally flawed and foolish men can be. I just don't enjoy watching it myself, and here's why:

I am a gay man. Having sex with another man is as natural and healthy to me as breathing. The prospect of sex with a woman is as unnatural and repugnant to me as sex with each other is to the guys in Humpday. But I would never want a woman to have to sit through a movie that shows her brutally and graphically how very disgusting she is to me sexually. However well-adjusted she may be, being told that she disgusts me could hurt her, unnecessarily, and I wouldn't want to do that.

That's exactly how Humpday makes me feel. It reminds me that the world is full of very powerful and likable men who find me disgusting, who would rather die than have to be like me or even risk seeming to be like me, and who would rather have ME die than get too close to them. What I AM disgusts and repels them.

It doesn't matter that the movie is not advocating that attitude. By simply reminding me how prevalent that attitude is, it digs into old wounds and causes me pain that does not add anything good to me.

I don't NEED to be reminded how much straight men despise me underneath whatever civilized veneer they may have put on, any more than African Americans need to be reminded how most in the white majority REALLY feel about them inside. It's painful, and although it IS important information, I'm not one of the ones who needs to see it.

So I appreciate Humpday's artistic excellence. It is one of the most powerful and well-realized movies I've ever seen. But it's not for me or for anyone like me, any more than a beautifully executed movie about rape would entertain or enlighten a victim of rape.

What a disappointment. This film started off promisingly, with a very funny premise that is established in a semi-believable way. Sadly, that is really all there is to the film. The funny premise leads nowhere, it is just milked and milked and milked until the audience is no longer laughing, but rather just waiting for it to end. Believability also starts going out the window about halfway through the film, with characters acting and reacting in ways that no human would, but are required contrivances to keep the story rolling along.

I too was not a fan of the overall aesthetic of the film, a sort of forced naturalism, with almost exclusively hand-held camera work, awkward quick focus and zoom changes, and an improvised feel to the dialog. I felt this sharply contrasted with the highly contrived nature of much of the script, and I also feel that it is generally unpleasant anyway.

It's simplistic and inaccurate to say this is a movie about homophobia. The two guys are not homophobic in the least. If anything it's about peer pressure and machismo, albeit in an unconventional, post-feminist context.

The movie's framework, two straight guys considering whether or not to have sex with each other for an Art/Porn movie, generates an absurd dialog. Does Art justify a willful, forced, deviation from the norm, or is a willful, forced, deviation from the norm automatically Art? The subtext is about moving out of your comfort zone, and your motivation for doing so.

I went into this not knowing what to expect. As a gay man, I resisted it, finding the plot line forced. But as it went on, I bought into it. I think it was the two main actors who sold it, primarily.

The premise sounds comic and coarse, but the storyline is actually subtle and gentle. Not easy to sell that kind of bait and switch.

There was a lot of promise here, but ultimately the film is a huge cop out, which perhaps is the point. In this case an opportunity to perhaps delve a bit deeper into male friendship and men's more tender feelings for each other was squandered. Nothing lost, nothing gained.

Those thinking that "Humpday" is about any ordinary Wednesday are in for a rude awakening from this flick written and directed by Lynn Shelton. For everyone else, you know you're in for a brave and, at times, very funny account of two straight guys who decide to make a gay porno. The two guys are best friends Ben (Mark Duplass) and Andrew (Joshua Leonard), whose lives have taken very different directions since High School. Ben is married to Anna (Alycia Delmore) with a baby on the way and Andrew is an artist and world traveler spending time with different women and experiences. The night after Andrew just shows up at Ben's doorstep looking to reconnect, the two find themselves at a party (at a house called Dionysus) thrown by Andrew's friend. Alcohol and the bong get passed around, guards are let down, and the conversation turns to sexual pleasures such as letting the dog lick peanut butter off you. Andrew mentions that he'd really like to make an erotic art film and Ben thinks that porn is a dime a dozen and if you really want to make something memorable, it has to be unique. The combination of these ideas plus being intoxicated leads to a pact where the two agree to have sex with one another. Can they do it? Will the two figure things out about themselves? Will Anna go along with it? The later question presents some very funny dance-around-the-subject moments. The developments in this movie about breaking down the walls of male homophobia are interesting. Actual nudity or sex is never shown nor does the movie fall back on crude humor but there is a lot of talk. Both guys feel like they have something to prove; Andrew that he is an uncompromising artist and Ben that he is not the boring, buttoned down family man that people think. Yet both are threatened, Andrew at a dildo introduced during a three-way and Ben at having feelings for a video store clerk. A scene where a basketball game between the two turns into a wrestling match says something for comfortable vs. uncomfortable physical intimacy between men and an honest conversation where Ben and Anna talk of their multi-faceted sexual needs not being met in this relationship alone are nice additions. Of course in the final scene the big question is broken down and analyzed, and some of the funniest stuff the movie has to offer is introduced. Will the physical fear become too real for the guys once hump day finally comes? The film is very talky and the camera work is grainy and dull-looking but what keeps the movie rolling are two very good performances from Duplass and Leonard. Duplass as the buttoned down, responsible Ben and Leonard as the wild-eyed, energetic Andrew; both display a willing but anxious chemistry of two guys who desperately want to be braver than they actually are. "Humpday" isn't always fun to watch but it's brave, funny, and interesting.