The Union

Well ... I found myself playing mindless games on my phone half way through, keeping a half an eye on the movie.

First the pros: the action sequences were pretty good. (Sorry, it's a short list) Cons: very little chemistry between the leads, I made the bad guy immediately (and if I did, why didn't the international super-spy?) and it just wasn't even believable enough to allow the suspension of disbelief needed for movies of this genre. One example: I suspect that secret agents do everything they can to blend in, rather than dressing like a cross between catwoman and action Barbie, with eye-catching hair.

Anyways ... not objectionable but with the resources obviously available, just feel like this could have been done way better.

It has become painfully clear that Hollywood is short on good writing. This movie has a ton of story to work with but instead flushes it down the toilet. To be clear it is a stylish action flick, it looks really pretty and the action scenes are fun to watch. The problem however is that the flick has employed an impressive number of A-list actors and gave them poop scripts. The only person that had any decent lines was J. K. Simmons, all the rest of the cast was wasted on a doo-doo script. It wouldn't be out of place to say this has been done before, and a lot better than this. After the plot was explained it was painfully obvious they just copy and pasted bits and pieces from other espionage movies to get this stylish looking thing on screens. It's too bad really, the story could have been worked into something much better than what the end result was. This is a watch and make fun of it while it plays movie, that could have been so much more.

Picturesque locations, good production values, some good actors and Mark Wahlberg, but nothing memorable. Perfect moving wallpaper to glance at occasionally while scrolling on your phone. Essentially it's a string of comfortable cliches strung together in a predictable sequence, designed to make you forget to cancel your Netflix subscription. Halle Berry looks better than ever, JK Simmons doesn't break a sweat using one of his 'grizzled' character templates.

The UK setting is puzzling because apart from the scenery it's almost wall-to-wall Americans doing American things in American ways. The Slovenian locations look beautiful but, again, they have no impact on the plot, which could easily have been generated by ChatGPT with a very short prompt.

A truly awful film and a waste of a talented cast. The plot must have been written by AI. It had every cliched plot point you could imagine; the ordinary man becoming a hero; spy stuff; the beautiful ex-girlfriend; action; a foreign location. It wasn't even funny, just grim.i gritted my teal and slogged through it. I'd like to say that there were some interesting plot points that could have been done better it expanded upon, but that wasn't the case. I appreciate that companies such as Netflix need content to keep their subscribers happy, but the quality needs to be much better, even if it takes longer to produce.

So not even 5 minutes into the movie, and you can already tell who the villain is, and how the movie most likely will end.

Unfortunately I was right.

It was way too predictable, some bad acting and emotions not making sense on the situations.

Choices and decisions that wouldn't make any sense at all, especially not from a so-called agency.

Don't get me wrong, it's a fun mindless watch and you should just turn off your brain, grab some chips and a beer and just watch together as a family. But other then that, it's not a movie I'd recommend. It doesn't stand out, fails to suprise or amaze, and honestly it felt long.

So if you're looking for something entertaining to watch as a family, than sure this movie will do.

However if you really want to watch something that drags you in, having you wonder what will happen next or suprise you, then skip this one.