Road to Hell

The first thing that should be said is that "Road to Hell" is not a film. It's not a movie. In truth, I don't know what it is. Youtube videos of mentos and diet coke are more cinematic than anything this attempts. It isn't just bad, it's Sega CD Full Motion Video Game circa 1992 bad. It makes "Night Trap" look like "The Godfather." It's the "2 Girls 1 cup" of sequels. Most importantly, it's an insult to "Streets of Fire" and everyone who has ever watched even five minutes of it.

Before the 60 + minute "dream project" proceeded to assault those not smart enough to walk out, Albert Pyun, his wife Cynthia Curnan, and a handful of others came up and explained what we would be seeing. Cynthia mentioned that it was the result of an argument that she and Albert had had about the ending of Streets of Fire. Albert had thought it was one of the most romantic endings of all time. Cynthia thought it was deeply tragic and showed that Tom Cody was doomed. She wrote "Road to Hell" to show what she thought would have happened to him.

If the near-finished product is any indication, Albert handily won that argument and by default has now won all subsequent arguments for the rest of their lives.

Put simply, "Road to Hell" is garbage -- cinematic fan-fiction that is essentially a pointless 60+ minutes of atrocious dialog in front of a green screen, mixed in with some black and white footage of Deborah Van Valkenburgh being interrogated and flashbacks of a poor double for Diane Lane lip-syncing and dancing along with two songs lifted from "Streets of Fire."

I'm not entirely sure why everything was filmed in front of a green screen, probably to give it that "filmed in one day" look. It definitely does no favors to the performances, and the computer animated backdrops used look like screen savers circa 1994. I kept half-expecting a flying toaster to glide across the screen. Sadly, like any hope that "Road to Hell" would be redeemed, it failed to materialize.

The muddled excuse for a plot centers around the idea that Tom Cody is now a deranged serial killer, waiting in the middle of nowhere in case Ellen Aim's tour bus happens to drive by.

Meanwhile the two least interesting former strippers turned murderers in the world come across him.

They yell and swear and swear and yell. They talk in circles. There's some blood and some kissing. It goes absolutely nowhere and just drags and drags and drags. It could have been whittled down into a five minute short, told the same "story," and it STILL would have been painful.

I guess the filmmakers deluded themselves into thinking they were making something artistic and the characters we see might be in purgatory, or some other metaphysical realm. Unless the filmmakers' intent was to make the viewer feel like they were literally in hell, they failed.

The only elements that are even remotely interesting at all are ripped from "Streets of Fire." It is fascinating watching Paré and Van Valkenburgh reprising their respective roles, or at least it would be if the dialog wasn't so mind numbingly awful that the characters as portrayed resemble those in "Streets of Fire" about as much as David Koresh resembled Jesus.

Pyun, particularly in his Cannon years, has made some legitimately entertaining no-budget films. There is nothing entertaining here. It captures none of the spirit, energy, character, or fun of "Steets of Fire." It's an ugly, draining, pointless trifle.

Do yourself a favor and stop caring about this now. It will only end in heartbreak.

I was going to wait until I had a chance to see the finished film because what I saw at the Fantastic Fest last year was almost too rough to watch. I must admit that even with the poor projection and clearly unfinished effects shots, the film packed a powerful if disturbing emotional wallop. At times I was so shocked by the rage fueled violence set to rock ballads that I could feel myself flush and even swept by a wave of momentarily nausea. The film is one that will split audiences because it really puts forth the depressing idea that for even larger than life iconic heroes, life can turn disappointing and desparing. I don't think I've ever seen a film that takes a dashing heroic figure as a youth and then shows us the ruins that is his life 20 years later. In a weird way it was an analogy for me to wars like Viet Nam where youth is idealistic, filled with life only to return home a shell of a man. That's what we have here. An almost super human and stoic hero reduced to a destructed, bitter man. He's delusional in the hope he can be saved. Pare does a masterful job in bringing Cody's pain, desperation, and confusion to life. It's the best performance in his career. Clare Kramer is very very good too. Her character must be one of the most obscenely vile person ever portrayed on screen. What is amazing is how she can be so ugly and yet so breathtakingly sexy in the same moment. I really want to withhold final judgment as the film did say it was a work in progress. The movie has definitely stayed with me. It screened with Pare's Streets of fire and that made the contrast of Pare even more striking. He's so young and youthful in Streets and so grimly weathered in Road To Hell. It's one of the more shocking things to see. Like one of those where are they now things where you see a sweet face then the now shows the image of a ravaged meth addict. You wonder how did one go from sweet to horrific? In a nutshell that's what this film explores.

Horrible acting, non existent plot. What was the significance of the ring? Blowing off of the head? Did they get a kid's art class to make the prop? Do not waste your time. There are no spoilers. Just questions why?

Let me start by saying what I saw at the Austin Fantastic Fest was very much still unfinished and a work in progress, as it proclaims at the outset. So what was screened was extremely rough. The projected image was dim and washed out because it was a video projector instead of a film projector and a friend said it was played from a laptop. The image did freeze a few times.

Okay, that stuff aside, how was the film itself? The words raw, shocking, disturbing and, like Ken Russell's or some of Oshima's films. Thought provoking and a film you watch from a distance because EVERYTHING is symbolic and stuffed with subtext and is as sexually violent as it gets. This might get an X rating I would think.

The film doesn't exist in a civilized reality but in Cody's (Pare) twisted mind, in his darkest feelings for the world. It really is like we are experiencing his stream of consciousness and its so distorted and angry. I will have to admit that Road to Hell screening immediately after Streets of Fire really does create a vivid contrast in how life doesn't always turn out well for the hero. And, like in Taxi Driver, this creates an almost pure force of rage against society. The violence and brutality is really window dressing in a sense as the film's true intent is the study of disillusionment and alienation.

It will be interesting to see the finished product because it is clearly ambitious in it's look and design. It's day-glo noir. What we saw was very unfinished and still needed work. Some shots were just against a green screen still with no background.

Pare gives the best performance I've ever seen from him. He's sexy, dangerous and evokes deep tragedy and a real sense of loss. We feel his disappointment in humankind and in life. In his view, there's nothing worth saving anymore. The only salvation before he becomes an utter monster is to find his long lost love Ellen. His great love from a time when the world still held some hope for him. You get a sense that the film was somehow cathartic for Pare as he goes full out in giving this searing performance.

As the she devil incarnate is Clare Kramer. What a performance. One moment she's the vilest creature ever to walk the earth and in the next you are rooting for her to achieve her dreams. Its an incredibly fine and brave performance by an actress I liked but now love. I won't give anything away but she becomes endearing by the end of the film. No easy task considering how vile she is throughout much of the film. She is raw and discomforting with brazen nudity included.

Everything about the film is stylized. It has an odd cadence to the speech patterns and has a noir feel to the language. Hardboiled and coarse and feeling like its drama is rooted in a experimental stage drama. It culminates in theatrical and surreal horror and madness.

How will people like it? I can't say until I see the film finished. But I would recommend watching Streets of Fire before watching Road to Hell to get the full view. This film may not be everyone's cup of java but it certainly not like any other film I've ever seen or felt. I might still give it a ten once I see the finished film.

When I first saw the trailer I was thinking... ok this is just some kinda of flashy joke trailer to show of some crappy CGI to get people talking. The movie surely won't look or feel anything like this. Right? WRONG. The whole film looks like it was greenscreened in someone's basement and someone who never shot a film or finished one in post production before. Everything about it is as BAD as you can imagine. Furthermore when I was first researching it to watch the IMDB rating was like around 6.2 so that made it sound more promising. After I came onto IMDB I found out what was happening was the filmmakers were peddling reviews at the local film fest before this thing was even finished... Probably doing favors so shills would give 10/10 ratings... if you want to see REAL ratings goto the reviews on Youtube. AVOID at all costs and never mention to anyone that this exists.