Metacritic reviews

The Machine has enough going in its favor to warrant a recommendation to fans of Kreischer's stand-up comedy, but other audience members may walk out feeling empty.

Writers Kevin Biegel and Scotty Landes adapt Kreischer’s unbelievable viral story about robbing a train with Russian mobsters into a retrospective on the comedian’s tumultuous history with excess—a tonal misfire of fantastical absurdity clashing against emotional confessions.

Hamill, however, is the MVP, continuing to deliver some of his best work as an older man. When he leaves the action for a spell, the energy leaves the movie.

The Machine really goes off the rails when it tries to turn itself into an action movie. The blandly violent fight sequences are only watchable because Hamill gets the occasional opportunity to show off his dorky-dad-on-cocaine schtick between punches.

The Machine is as surprisingly stylish as it is surprisingly unfunny.

Even when the relentlessly salty humor gets fully crass (a dog is thrown out a high window), the product is bland.

I love a good gonzo binge boozing comedy as much as the next guy, but I found almost nothing funny in this.