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Carl Fredricksen: This is crazy. I finally meet my childhood hero and he's trying to kill us. What a joke.
Dug: Hey, I know a joke! A squirrel walks up to a tree and says, "I forgot to store acorns for the winter and now I am dead." Ha! It is funny because the squirrel gets dead.

[Carl, in his once-again airborne house, suddenly hears a knock at the front door]
Carl Fredricksen: [Surprised] Russell?
[opens the door to find Dug on his doorstep and is very happy]
Carl Fredricksen: [Smiles] Dug!
Dug: [Looking sad] I was hiding under your porch because I love you. Can I stay?
Carl Fredricksen: [Delightfully] Can you stay? Why, you're my dog, aren't you? And I'm your master!
Dug: [His sadness turns into happiness. As he happily wags his tail] You are my master? Oh, boy! Oh, boy!
[happily tackles Carl and covers him in slobbery kisses]
Carl Fredricksen: [laughing] Good boy, Dug. You're a good boy.

Russell: That might sound boring, but I think the boring stuff is the stuff I remember the most.

Carl Fredricksen: Hey, let's play a game. It's called "See Who Can Be Quiet the Longest".
Russell: Cool! My mom loves that game!

Young Ellie: [to Carl] You don't talk much... I like you!

Young Ellie: [Ellie opens her Adventure Book to reveal to Carl a "Life" magazine with Charles Muntz on the cover] You know him.
[Carl gasps]
Young Ellie: Charles Muntz, explorer. When I get big, I'm going where he's going,
[pulls away the magazine to reveal a map of...]
Young Ellie: South America. It's like America, but south.

Russell: [reading from his scout handbook in monotone] Good afternoon. My name is Russell, and I am a Wilderness Explorer in Tribe 54, Sweatlodge 12. Are you in need of any assistance today, sir?
Carl Fredricksen: No.
Russell: I could help you cross the street.
Carl Fredricksen: No.
Russell: I could help you cross your yard.
Carl Fredricksen: No.
Russell: I could help you cross your... porch?
Carl Fredricksen: No.
Russell: Well, I gotta help you cross *something*!

Construction Foreman Tom: This is serious. He's out to get your house!
Carl Fredricksen: Tell your boss he can *have* our house.
Construction Foreman Tom: Really?
Carl Fredricksen: When I'm dead!
[goes inside and slams the front door]
Construction Foreman Tom: I'll take that as a maybe!

Russell: [Whining] I'm tired! My knee hurts!
Carl Fredricksen: Which knee?
Russell: ...My elbow hurts!

Alpha, Beta, Gamma: Not you, what do we do with Dug? He has lost the bird, put him in the cone of shame.
[Dug whimpers]
Dug: [wearing a cone around his head in the next scene, and hangs his head sadly] I do not like the cone of shame.

Russell: [points to Kevin] I found the snipe!
Carl Fredricksen: [amused] Oh, did you now?
[chuckles]
Russell: Are they tall?
Carl Fredricksen: Oh, yes. They're very tall.
Russell: Do they have a lot of colors?
Carl Fredricksen: They do, indeed!
Russell: Do they like chocolate?
Carl Fredricksen: Ye... chocolate?
[he turns around and sees Kevin]
Carl Fredricksen: Gaah! What is that thing?

[Carl just saved Russell, tied to a chair, from falling to his death off Muntz' Airship, and leaves him on the porch]
Russell: But I want to help!
Carl Fredricksen: I don't want your help, I want you safe.

Russell: A wilderness explorer is a friend to all, be a plant or fish or tiny mole!
Carl Fredricksen: That doesn't even rhyme!
Russell: [offended] Yeah it does.

Carl Fredricksen: [after his house hits a cliff and shatters a window] I am nobody's master, got it? I don't want you here
[points his cane at Dug]
Carl Fredricksen: and I don't want you here!
[points it at Kevin]
Carl Fredricksen: [addressing Russell] I'm stuck with you, but if you two don't clear out of here by the time I count to three...
Dug: Oh! A ball! Oh, boy! Oh, boy! A ball!
[whines]
Carl Fredricksen: Ball?
[chuckles]
Carl Fredricksen: You want it, boy?
Dug: Oh! Oh! Oh! Oh!
Carl Fredricksen: Huh? Huh?
Dug: Yes, I do! I so ever do want the ball!
Carl Fredricksen: Go get it!
[throws the ball]
Dug: Oh, boy! Oh, boy! I will go get it and then bring it back!
[runs off]
Carl Fredricksen: Russell, give me some chocolate.
[grabs a piece of chocolate from Russell and throws it into the bushes, leaving Kevin to run off after it]

[Carl, with his house high in the air, hears a knock at the door and finds Russell on the front porch]
Russell: Hi, Mr. Fredricksen! It's me, Russell!
Carl Fredricksen: What are you doing out here, kid?
Russell: I found the snipe and I followed it under your porch, but this snipe had a long tail and looked more like a large mouse.
[Russell's Wilderness Explorers flag blows away in the wind]
Russell: Please let me in.
Carl Fredricksen: No.
[Carl goes inside and slams the door. Russell waits uncertainly a few moments]
Carl Fredricksen: [opens the door] Oh, all right. You can come...
[Russell races past Carl into the house]
Carl Fredricksen: ...in.

Russell: [off screen in the jungle] Mr. Fredricksen? Am I supposed to dig the hole before or after?
Carl Fredricksen: Nyaa! None of my concern!
Russell: [after a pause] Oh... It's before!
Carl Fredricksen: Nyaa!
[covers his ears and shakes his head]

Russell: [Carl and Russell find Dug in a South American desert; Russel pets him] Hey, I like dogs!
Carl Fredricksen: [calling out] We have your dog!
Russell: [Dug walks around Russell] Whoa.
Carl Fredricksen: I wonder who he belongs to?
Russell: Sit, boy.
[Dug sits]
Russell: Hey look, he's trained! Shake.
[Dug shakes his paw]
Russell: Uh-huh. Speak.
Dug: Hi there.
Carl Fredricksen: [He and Russell make surprised exclamations] Did that dog just say "Hi there"?
Dug: Oh, yes.
Carl Fredricksen: Whaa!
Dug: My name is Dug. I have just met you, and I love you.
[he jumps up on Carl]
Carl Fredricksen: Wha...
Dug: My master made me this collar. He is a good and smart master and he made me this collar so that I may speak. Squirrel!
[looks to distance for a few seconds]
Dug: My master is good and smart.
Carl Fredricksen: It's not possible!
Dug: Oh, it is because my master is smart!
Russell: Cool! What do these do, boy?
Russell: [Russell starts to fiddle with a dial on Dug's collar, causing him to cycle through languages and different voices] Hey would you - cuerdo con tigo - I use that collar - watashi wa hanashi ma - to talk with. I would be happy if you stop.
Carl Fredricksen: Russell, don't touch that. It could be... radioactive or something.
Dug: I am a great tracker. My pack sent me on a special mission, all by myself. Have you seen a bird? I am going to find one, and I am on the scent. I am a great tracker; did I mention that?
[Dug is suddenly attacked by Kevin, who shrieks in Dug's face after pinning him to the ground]
Dug: Hey, that is the bird! I have never seen one up close, but this is the bird. May I take your bird back to camp as my prisoner?
Carl Fredricksen: Yes, yes, take it! And on the way, learn how to bark like a real dog!
Dug: Oh, I can bark.
[barks]
Dug: And this is howling.
[howls]
Russell: [Kevin screeches] Can we keep him? Please, please, please?
Carl Fredricksen: No.
Russell: But it's a TALKING DOG!
Carl Fredricksen: It's just a weird trick or something. Let's get to the falls.

Carl Fredricksen: You'd better get up, Russell. Or else, the tigers will come and eat you.
Russell: There are no Tigers in South America. Zoology.

Dog: [to Carl and Russell after Muntz accepts them] I like you temporarily!

Carl Fredricksen: [to Kevin] Get off my roof!
Dug: Yeah! Get off of his...
[barks]

Carl Fredricksen: I can't tell where we are.
Russell: Oh, we're in South America, all right. It was a cinch with my Wilderness Explorer GPS.
Carl Fredricksen: GP what?
Russell: My dad gave it to me; it shows exactly where we are on the planet!
[runs to window making beeping sounds]
Russell: With this baby, we'll never be lost!
[gestures and accidentally throws the unit out the window]
Russell: Oops.

Carl Fredricksen: [after throwing both a ball and chocolate into the jungle to get rid of Dug and Kevin, Carl runs with his house for a considerable distance] There. We should've gone enough. We should be rid of them now.
[looks to his left and sees Dug]
Dug: [with the ball in his mouth] Hi, Master.
[Carl turns to his right and Kevin squawks in his ear]

Dug: [to the bird Kevin] Won't you please be my prisoner, please, please, please!

Alpha: Why do I not have the surprised feeling?

Charles Muntz: Adventure is out there!

Dug: [With Kevin up on the roof of Carl's house, calling out] The Bird is calling to her babies.
Russell: Her babies! Kevin's a Girl?

Dug: I will stop the dogs!
[jumps in front of a pack of dogs]
Dug: Stop, you dogs!
[Pack of dogs runs past Dug. Alpha grabs him by the collar and throws him out of the way, which breaks the cone around his head]

Alpha: [Through a communicator on Beta's collar] This is Alpha calling Dug. Come in, Dug.
Dug: Hi Alpha. Hey, your voice sounds funny.
Alpha: I know, I know! Have you seen the bird?
Dug: Why, yes. The bird is my prisoner now.
Gamma: Yeah, right!
[Kevin hisses at the screen]
Alpha: Impossible! Where are you?
Dug: I am here with the bird, and I will bring it back, and then you will like me. Oh, gotta go.
[Russell appears on the screen]
Russell: Hey Dug! Who you talking to?
Alpha: [the screen goes black] No, wait, wait!
Beta: What's Dug doing?
Gamma: Why's he with that small mailman?
Beta: Where are they?
[Alpha locates Dug on GPS]
Dug: There he is, come on!
[they all dart into the jungle]

Charles Muntz: Any last words Fredricksen? Come on, spit it out!
[Carl spits out his dentures]

Russell: Hey look, buildings! That building's so close, I can almost touch it!
Russell: [In Carl's thought] Wow! This is great! You should try this, Mr. Fredricksen! Look, there's a bus stop that could take me home two blocks away! Heyy, I can see your house from here!
Carl Fredricksen: [pulling on rope] Don't jerk around so much, kid -
[let's go, shocked]
Russell: AHH!
[fades away]
Carl Fredricksen: [back in reality] Well, that's not gonna work.

Russell: [to Carl, about Kevin] This was her favorite candy bar. Because you sent her away, there's more for you.

Carl Fredricksen: [George and A.J. walk up to Carl's door and A.J. knocks on it. Carl opens the door] Morning, gentlemen.
Nurse George: Good morning, Mr. Fredricksen. You ready to go?
Carl Fredricksen: [chuckles] Ready as I'll ever be. Would you do me a favor and take this?
[hands A.J. a suitcase]
Carl Fredricksen: I'll meet you at the van in just a minute. I, uh, wanna say one last goodbye to the old place.
Nurse George: Sure. Take all the time you need, sir.
[Carl slams his door shut]
Nurse AJ: That's typical. He's probably going to the bathroom for the 80th time.
[they start walking to their van]
Nurse George: [sees the mess of helium canisters on Carl's lawn and scoffs] You think he'd take better care of his house.
[a large shadow begins to loom up behind them. Many balloons emerge from beneath a tarp and lift Carl's house off of the ground. Both scream. Carl's house hits their van. Its alarm goes off]
Carl Fredricksen: Ah, ha ha ha! So long, boys! I'll send you a postcard from Paradise Falls!

Russell: I've never been in a floating house before.
[Russell sees a picture of Ellie and laughs]
Russell: Goggles. Look at this stuff. Wow! You're going on a trip?
[Russell picks up a picture of Paradise Falls and reads from it]
Russell: "Paradise Falls, a land lost in time." You're going to South America, Mr. Fredricksen?
[Carl grabs the picture from Russell]
Carl Fredricksen: Don't touch that! You'll soil it.
Russell: You know, most people take a plane, but you're smart because you'll have all your TV and clocks and stuff.

Charles Muntz: You know, Carl... these people who pass through here, they all tell pretty good stories.
[Muntz walks to a row of human skulls on a shelf, each wearing a flight helmet]
Charles Muntz: A "surveyor" making a map.
[knocks over the first skull with his cane]
Charles Muntz: A "botanist" cataloguing plants.
[knocks over the second skull]
Charles Muntz: An old man taking his house to Paradise Falls.
[lifts and drops the third skull, which rolls across the floor and stops at Carl's feet]
Charles Muntz: That's the best one yet. I can't wait to hear how it ends.

Russell: Where are you keeping Kevin? Let me go!
Beta: Scream all you want, small mailman.
Alpha: None of your mailman friends can hear you.
Russell: I'll unleash all my Wilderness Explorer training!

Dug: Oh, please, oh, please, oh, please be my prisoner!
Russell: Dug, stop bothering Kevin!
Dug: That man there says I should take the bird...
[Kevin squacks at Dug]
Dug: ... and I love that man there like he is my master.
Carl Fredricksen: I am not your master!
Dug: I am warning you once again, bird!
Russell: Hey! Quit it!
Dug: I am jumping on you now, bird!
Carl Fredricksen: Russell, at this rate we'll never get to the falls!
Dug: Here, bird!

Russell: The wilderness must be explored! CA-CA! RAAWWRR!

Carl Fredricksen: [to Russell] Now, we're gonna walk to the falls quickly and quietly with no rap music or flashdancing.
Russell: Uh-huh.
Carl Fredricksen: We have three days, at best, before the helium leaks out of those balloons. And if we're not at the falls when that happens...
Russell: [behind Carl, obviously distracted, looking down] Sand.
Carl Fredricksen: ...we're not getting to the falls.
Russell: I found sand!
Carl Fredricksen: [looks up at his house, through a window, to where a picture of old Ellie hangs on the wall] Don't you worry, Ellie. We'll get our house over there.

Carl Fredricksen: [Having arrived above Paradise Falls in South America, miles from where they took off] Don't worry, I'll get you down, find a Bus Stop.
[cuts off the strings to some of the balloons, allowing the house to descend down]
Russell: Whoa, that's s gonna be like a billion transfers to get back to my house...

Alpha: [In squeaky voice] Master, dinner is ready.
Charles Muntz: Oh, yes, broken collar? It's that loose wire again.
[fixes the collar]
Charles Muntz: There you go, big fella.
Alpha: [In deep, intimidating voice] Thank you, Master.
Russell: [Nervously] I liked his other voice better.

[Dug manages to outsmart Alpha]
Dog: [All dogs gasp] He wears the cone of shame!
[Alpha struggles to get his head unstuck from Between the Steering Wheel. He also damaged his Collar while doing so]
Alpha: [Squeaky Voice] Not yet you fools attack!
[the other dogs laugh]
Alpha: No no! Stop your laughing Get this off of me!
Dug: Listen you dog Sit!
[Alpha sits, the Other Dogs then do the same]
Dog: Yes Alpha!
Dug: Hey, I'm not Alpha. He is. Oh!

Russell: [after Carl's house has fell down to the ground and was presumably destroyed] Sorry about your house, Mr. Fredricksen.
Carl Fredricksen: You know... it's just a house.

Beta: Chocolate, I smell chocolate!
Gamma: I'm getting prunes and denture cream! Who are they?
Beta: Oh, man, Master will not be pleased. We better tell him someone took the bird. Right, Alpha?
Alpha: [in a squeaky voice] No. Soon enough the bird will be ours yet again. Find the scent, my compadres, and you too shall have much rewardings from Master for the toil factor you wage.
Beta: Hey, Alpha, I think there's something wrong with your collar. You must have bumped it.
Gamma: Yeah, your voice sounds funny!
[they both laugh]
Alpha: Beta! Gamma!
[they both stop laughing]
Alpha: Mayhaps you desire to - SQUIRREL!
[All of them turn their attention to a nearby tree; slight pause, Gamma whimpers]
Alpha: Mayhaps you desire to challenge the ranking that I have been asigned by my strength and cunning...
Beta: No, no, no. But maybe Dug would. You might wanna ask him.
Gamma: Yeah. I wonder if he's found the bird on his very special mission.
Alpha: Do not mention Dug to me at this time. His fool's errand will keep him most occupied. Most occupied, indeed. Ha ha ha! Do you not agree with that which I am saying to you now?
Beta: Sure, but the second Master finds out you sent Dug out by himself, none of us will get a treat.
[He and Gamma whine]
Alpha: [lunges and growls at them] You are wise, my trusted lieutenant.

[Muntz had just taken Kevin, and set Carl's House on Fire, which popped some of the balloons and left it floating only inches to the ground]
Russell: You gave away Kevin. You just... gave her away.
Carl Fredricksen: This is none of my concern.
[Turns around, Furious after what happened]
Carl Fredricksen: I DIDN'T ASK FOR ANY OF THIS.
Dug: Master, it's alright.
Carl Fredricksen: I AM NOT YOUR MASTER! AND YOU DIDN'T SHOW UP, NONE OF THIS WOULDN'T HAVE HAPPENED. BAD DOG! BAD DOG! Now whether you assist me or not, I am going to Paradise Falls, if it kills me.

Construction Foreman Tom: Hey! 'Morning, Mr. Fredricksen. Need any help there?
Carl Fredricksen: No. Yes. Tell your boss over there that you boys are ruining our house.
Construction Foreman Tom: Well, just to let you know, my boss would be happy to take this old place off your hands, and for double his last offer! What do you say to that?
[Carl blows Tom's hat off with his leaf blower]
Construction Foreman Tom: Uh, I take that as a no, then.
Carl Fredricksen: I believe I made my position to your boss quite clear.
Construction Foreman Tom: You poured prune juice in his gas tank.
Carl Fredricksen: [snickers] Oh, yeah, that was good.

Carl Fredricksen: You've been camping before, haven't you?
Russell: Well, never outside.
Carl Fredricksen: Well, why didn't you ask your dad how to build a tent?
Russell: I don't think he wants to talk about this stuff.
Carl Fredricksen: Why don't you try him sometime? Maybe he'll surprise you.
Russell: Well, he's away a lot. I don't see him much.
Carl Fredricksen: He's got to be home sometime.
Russell: Well, I called, but... Phyllis told me I bug him too much.
Carl Fredricksen: Phyllis? You call your own mother by her first name?
Russell: Phyllis isn't my mom.
Carl Fredricksen: [sheepish] Oh.

Construction Worker Steve: [directing a large construction vehicle backing up] Okay, keep her coming. Keep coming. And stop. Stop. Stop!
[it starts to run over Carl's mailbox]
Carl Fredricksen: [watching from his doorway] Why... Hey! Hey you!
[Steve sees him and runs to the mailbox]
Carl Fredricksen: What do you... What do you think you're doing?
[he shuffles quickly to his mailbox]
Construction Worker Steve: I am so sorry, sir.
[he attempts to fix Carl's mailbox]
Carl Fredricksen: Don't touch that!
Construction Worker Steve: [they fight for control of the mailbox] No, no, no. Let me take care of that for you.
Carl Fredricksen: Get away from our mailbox!
Construction Worker Steve: Hey. Sir, I...
Carl Fredricksen: I don't want you to touch it!
[he clubs Steve on the head with his cane. Blood is drawn. Carl retreats into his house, ashamed]

Charles Muntz: [on board his Spirit of Adventure airship] Does anyone know WHERE THEY ARE?
[Russell is suddenly dragged across the large window by a garden hose. Muntz stares while his eye twitches]

Russell: Oh! Mr. Fredricksen! If we happen to get separated, use the wilderness explorer call: "CA - CA! RAWRRR!"

Dug: I can smell you!
Carl Fredricksen: [confused] What? You can, smell us?
Dug: I can smell you!
Russell: [when Carl realizes that the "person" he's talking to is actually a rock, laughing] You were talking to a rock.

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