XII

I saw this film in the video shop yesterday and decided to give it a try. When I saw what ratings this film got here, I was sort of put off but at the same, I had high hopes that this might succeed in me giving it at least a 6.

That's not the case in this film and I tell you why in pointers.

First off like the film Seed, I don't know about you guys but I found Seed to be some sort of Michael Myers rip-off. Here I have the same minor problem. At first the Leonard Karl Character is quite awesome but as we see what goes behind doors, in his house, he is more portrayed as a Leatherface character. I don't know if that's what you guys think but that's what I think. Yes, we get a cool looking killer but it treaded on when a poor writing director tries to use someone else's character to rip theirs off. The director ruined his killer which sucks (in that sense). Overally I found the Killer enjoyable to watch in action. One thing with Karl I found the director pulled off well was the amount of screen time Karl was on for. He was on at the right moments and he was paced on the screen well, not revealing too much till the end.

From start to finish, we get crappy un-developed characters that we really don't care about, and we just want them to die or live either way. I had high hopes that eventually we would come to like these characters. oh well.

the music is OK.

The acting is bad. Not much else to say about how bad it is.

The kills are average at best. They were timed right (being honest). I never had a problem with them.

The story also could have been more awesome and conclusive if we didn't have such poor actors, scenes and scares. There was nothing about this film that was scary and as for the script, it feels as if it's poorly written and when every scene comes around the corner, it just goes no where.

A really poor film. 4.9/10

At least the movie lets you know how horrible it is from the get-go.

From the first five minutes you get treated to tired clichés, sub-par writing delivered by untalented people playing pretend rather than actually acting, you get to witness cinematography that is on par with a passionate hobbyist who lacks actual experience and the audio for the actors sounds like it's coming out of a shallow can.

I understand the fun that can be had from a campy B horror flick but XII misses that classification soundly. No fun can be had here by anyone who is not related to the people involved in making this reckless attempt at film making.

From beginning to end you'll grimace at everything but the actual horror.

I'll begin with the title of the movie. Let's just say it's pretty easy to decode/decipher, which makes it kinda painful, that the characters in the movie, don't realise it for a very long time. That's all I'm gonna say.

Having seen HATCHET and therefor seen Ms. McNabs natural and therefor obvious talents, might be a disappointment for those waiting, to be "exposed" to the same thing here (pun intended). But she plays her part very convincing (for a horror movie) and the others don't let her down. On the other hand, the script does let them and the audience down and the "Less is sometimes more" phrase could've applied here too (especially at the end, where it tried to compensate for the lack in other departments, in just being ... out there! Not really bad, but not really good either!

The folks of Blandsville, Blandizona are going missing for some reason (they were on a jury that put away some nutcase). This guy be skinning off'n the faces of these folks for some reason. It takes an awfully long time for people to figure out what's going on.

Luckily, on sabbatical after recording 'Chunga's Revenge' with Frank Zappa, Flo and Eddi arrive in town and have brought along Knight Rider 2000 to help solve the case! The film really takes off here, thankfully.

You might fall asleep during that bit though, and upon missing it, find the film to be a dull affair with a load of human drama (what was all that crap with the boyfriend about? That led nowhere). You don't even see much in the way of slashing. Way to botch the job, losers.

Except that bit where Flo and Eddi turn up in the killer's house and distract him with a rousing version of Sharleena.

I'm cryyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyying (over this dull movie)