Bikini Bloodbath

If you watch this movie expecting something like a Spike Lee or Michael Bay film, then you will definitely be disappointed. Bikini Bloodbath is an all out array of jokes, blood, boobs, and slapstick. These guys are either genius or clinically insane, but in any case they know how to make a movie that you can sit back and laugh with. Many of the gags in the film will fly right over your head, but that is what adds to the humor of the whole thing. The dialogue is written so that every line leads to a joke... or a death. Even the fictional band "White Liger", which plays many of the songs in the film, is ridiculously funny. A side-splitting comedy with some of the most beautiful ladies can't be bad. For what the directors were going for, they hit it perfectly as this is by far one of my favorite independent horror films to date.

Before i start, i was not expecting much from the title but, I have Finally found a movie worse than any Ben Afleck film and thats a promise. I honestly never thought i would see this day.

What we have here is a standard slasher flick, you get all the usual nude shower scenes, Lesbian Butch Gym teacher and parents away so lets have a party at the house scenario. Now Imagine and its damn hard to but just for a minute imagine a world where the music goes from one scene of Metalica to the next with Busted !!!!. The Killer i am sure is the lead singer from ZZ Top wearing a Chefs outfit........WHY.

Anyway the girls organise a party, its an all night Chick party so what kind would you have in this sort of cheap effort, pyjama party or lingerie party or fancy dress party. Ohhhhh Noooo they have balloons and streamers, i thought i had gone back 30 years to my 4th Birthday. I was waiting for the Jelly and Ice Cream to arrive next.

I don't want to even get started on the sports Jocks. The usual would be adolescent boys throwing an American football to each other, you would think then, hey these guys are the football team. No these boys are all chubby wasters wearing t-shirts with the words "Football Player", i also counted 57 times they high fived each other.

Just as all hope seemed to fade away a noise started to grown from the background, it was getting clearer and clearer, yes the jocks were dancing to Footloose. I was expecting Kevin Bacon to make an appearance but all we got were a bunch of overweight Muppet's dancing to what looked like Chunk doing the truffle Shuffle from the Goonies.

In conclusion i shall leave you to decide but take this one last line to give you inspiration when deciding whether to watch this abysmal effort. A Girl is killed on the toilet in the bathroom, the guy runs out and shouts "shes dead, shes dead" and another girl responds are you sure she is not in there for number 2.

I shall say no more.

For what it's worth it was a really silly, and fun movie. The contrast between scenes, musically and in the delivery of lines was hilarious.

Firstly, the girls were obviously hot, and the pacing is decent in every scene except the horror scenes. The party was badly scripted, basically it was very weak. Obviously a low budget movie, which allows for some really silly dialog, and off the cuff scenes which can be entertaining.

This is one of those so bad it's enjoyable movies.

Love the Citizen Kane spoof, silly lines, Suzy being reminded over and over how she wasn't invited, looking for predator, etc.. this movie obviously doesn't take itself too seriously, and neither should you.

This movie begins with a young high school student named "Jenny" (Leah Ford) waking up one morning with the radio broadcasting that a serial killer by the name of "William Leschenski" (Robert Cosgrove Jr.) is on the loose. Apparently, she isn't listening as she dresses and goes to school. The next scene involves a volleyball game with four female students on each side along with a lesbian coach named "Miss Johnson" (Debbie Rochon) and another student by the name of "Suzy" (Sheri Toczko) on the sidelines because none of the other girls like her. After a shower scene Jenny tells the girls that she is having a party that night at her house and invites everyone except Suzy. Meanwhile some football players are also having a party that night as well. Unfortunately, the serial killer known now as "Chef Death" decides to target Jenny's party and proceeds to murder several of them one by one. Now rather than reveal any more of this film and risk ruining it for those who haven't seen it, I will just say that this movie was about as cheap and trashy as they come. Personally, I thought the acting, script and music were all bad and the comedy was crass and repetitive. As a matter of fact, about the only good thing about this movie was the presence of a few attractive ladies in bikinis which included Katie Gil (as "Portia"), Olja Hrustic ("Ginger"), Amy Pelletier ("Stacy") and the aforementioned Leah Ford. But other than that, I saw nothing of any value or interest and as a result I rate this movie as definitely below average.

Wow... There are so many things you can do in your lifetime than watch this movie. Sure, it has Debbie Rochon. (For about 5 minutes...) And of course the production company cashes in on this BIG TIME. This is no more than a bunch of friends getting together making a home movie. One of them has a decent camera, (which it seems they never cleaned...) so they decided to make a movie after a night of drinking. If you've seen any interviews with them, they proudly declare that they came up with the title LONG before they came up with a concept for the movie, and it shows. The special effects really aren't really that special. The acting really isn't acting. In fact, it's almost insulting. Production value is laughable. Just how many producers are needed to make a low budget flick like this anyways? When you see one of the bikini clad girls is one of the producers, it makes you think... "Casting Couch" There is no way the "Suzy" character was actually hired to do this film. She's not good looking, she can't act, but she's in many scenes and she's a producer. She doesn't even get naked... She either invested a lot of money in the film or "worked" her way into this project in her own special way... A story would have been nice. At least a back story... Anything. The only reason I gave it 2 stars is because you get to see some boobs and there are some laughable moments. Low budget film fans might find a few redeeming qualities, but it will be a stretch.