House

Let me first say I watched it so you don't have to. House seems to be a film geared to horror movie fans, surfing along on the bet that people are going to appreciate seeing reenactments of familiar scenarios. So familiar in fact that it has a rip off quality to it, which ultimately comes across as lazy. The plot, if there is one, is about four extremely attractive young people, stranded at the same time in a house in the middle of nowhere. When WILL these youngin's learn not to drive their classic cars down dirt roads in the boonies? There's a creepy family out there, just waiting to freak their freaks. The house in question IS pretty cool, I wouldn't mind owning it. It's big and lit with green lights and decorated with serial killer wallpaper. Its basement is enormous and there are serious plumbing problems. Absolutely nothing justifies the R rating, this could have aired on the Sci-fi channel without edits. Was there a bribe on the part of the producers? "Please sir, give us an R, that'll bring 'em in expecting shocks and gore". This movie has a Texas Chainsaw-lite family, suggestions of Satanism, little girl ghost, crazed killer, vaporous black smoke, Spielberg like whispy thingies, gravity defying water, a thunderstorm that appears right on cue, no cell phone signals, several twists, and Michael Madson cashing a paycheck. You'd think, that with all this, there would be something to watch, but no. It goes in many directions, only to switch to another direction with no point, purpose or resolution. Awful.

Jack and Stephanie, a bickering married couple on their way to couples' counseling, get stranded in the woods after two of their tires get a flat. They find themselves at an old hotel to get out of the pouring rain and possibly call for help. There they find another stranded couple, Leslie and Randy, who are the only other guests there. All four soon find themselves meeting the owner's of the hotel who seem slightly off somehow. They decide to make the best of a bad situation until a maniac known as "the Tin Man" who's outside gives them an ultimatum: They all have till dawn to kill one of the four or they all die. They each have to face their inner demons respectively if they wish to survive the night.

The juxtaposition of the term 'Christian Horror' has always struck me as somewhat peculiar as someone who grew up in the 1980's where a good many of the horror offerings had slightly religious morality: you had premarital sex, you died, you did drugs, you died, etcetera, etc. But I digress, this had something most of the self-monikered 'christian' films lacked, good production values. Making it only doubly sad that the film's saddled with such a cliché story, poor characterization, trite dialog, and mediocre acting. I've heard the book is better, as is often the case, but i'm not reviewing the book. And as a film, this ultimately fails.

My Grade: D+

DVD Extras: Trailers for Bella, & The Spirit. That's all, some director's commentary would've been nice but alas no

I had been waiting for this movie since it was announced it would come out. I am a fan of the book which is just creepy and crazy. I always know that it is seldom that a movie is as good as the book, but this movie killed the book with bordom.

The movie lacked intensity, fear or surprise. The acting was subpar and the editing left many holes in the story leading to a confusing and preachy movie. The characters don't develop during the movie and you are left with a cardboard taste.

Most of the original story line was destroyed and viewers are left with a watered down version of an intense story. The preachy added in parts just took away.

I didn't even realize this was a Ted Dekker story until the end of the film, which explains a lot. He's also responsible for the "story" in the lame Seven knockoff cleverly titled "Three". He also writes Christian horror, whatever the hell that means. Michael Madsen is usually a recipe for disaster in any movie not titled Reservoir Dogs, and he screws it up here as well. Apparently Christian horror is about as effective as Christian rock. It looks like horror, kinda smells like horror, but it's not really horror. I'm not too religious myself, but being a Christian doesn't mean you have to stomach half-baked garbage like this just because it's written by someone who touts himself as a Christian writer. It's like liking those horrifyingly bad Left Behind books. Don't excuse bad writing just because the writer is a Christian. That's weak sauce. Use your head, people. There is also no reason for this to be rated R whatsoever. I can't remember any swearing and there was hardly any blood considering all the death in the film. There's an interesting concept in the flick somewhere but it gets lost in the shoddy camera-work and hit-or-miss acting that proves everyone involved is not quite ready for prime time. It gets one extra star for the awesome Bill Moseley, though he's wasted in this disappointing wanna-be horror film. Ted Dekker and Dan Brown should get together. Maybe between them they might be able to come up with a fully-functioning story. I said might...

Well, as a guy who occasionally watches movies from the horror genre, i found this movie quite interesting. If you are a person who doesn't like too much gore and blood but need to get ur adrenaline pumping for sometime, then i would suggest you go for it. This is just one of the rare horror movies without all that. Shouldn't be rated R for sure, i feel that quite a few 15 - 17 year olds would also enjoy this movie. The 6 stars are for making a movie for the rare category of people who like horror movies with no gore.

I would have rated it higher but the story made no sense, some of the characters made no sense and i ended up kinda confused in the end with a lot of unanswered questions. Like some of the people commented, the movie does not suck and it isn't too good either. I would suggest watching it if you just want a few thrills without the nightmares that come with them