Plot

Klinger's wife wants a divorce, Radar's upset because his mom is seeing a new man, B.J. finds out that another man made a pass at his wife, and Hawkeye receives another love letter for another soldier named Benjamin Pierce.

Radar drives up with bags of mail; Klinger cannot wait for Radar to sort it: he has not heard from Laverne in weeks. Hawkeye gets mail meant for another Captain BF Pierce who appears to be "some kind of Romeo." BJ's Peggy had to fix a plumbing issue and was hit on by a neighbor at a party; BJ is very upset. Radar learns his mother has a new friend: a gentleman friend. Margaret has the MIL from Hell; when Donald put Margaret forth for DAR membership, his mother blackballed her. The Boston baldy has no comfort and no sense for Margaret. Klinger cried wolf too many times: his wife is divorcing him and no one believes him. Klinger tells Father Mulcahy he will go AWOL. Radar confides in Hawkeye his issues about his mother dating; Hawkeye tells him a story and also tells him he is jealous at having to share his mother. BJ is crazy: does Peggy need him anymore? Who is this mysterious Romeo named Captain BF Pierce. Will Klinger really go AWOL?—LA-Lawyer

Radar drives up with bags of mail; Klinger cannot wait for Radar to sort it: he has not heard from Laverne in weeks.

Hawkeye gets mail meant for another Captain BF Pierce who appears to be "some kind of Romeo." Who is this mysterious Romeo named Captain BF Pierce (Oliver Clark). In the letters all the girls he has dated go all mushy about him (nibbling on her shoulder-blade in an avocado farm at harvest time. Hot breath on the nape of her neck). The other Pierce passes through 4077 to collect his mail and BJ and Hawkeye are curious what makes the girls go crazy about him. He deadpans that he is a "funny" guy.

Winchester rejoices when he learns that 40% of Missouri sorghum crop was destroyed by bad weather, as he is invested in the Canadian Sorghum crop. BJ's Peggy had to fix a plumbing issue (she now has a flooded kitchen and a cold) and was hit on by a neighbor at a party; BJ is very upset. BJ is going crazy: does Peggy need him anymore? BJ places a 3 am call to Peggy and ask her if she still needs him. She does, and BJ can go back to sleep peacefully. Radar learns his mother has a new friend: a gentleman friend. Radar's mother is almost 50, and he thinks old people should not get married. Radar confides in Hawkeye his issues about his mother dating a teller at the Farmer's bank (working there for 30 yrs now, 3rd degree mason and a usher at the church); Hawkeye tells him a story. His father is a widower and Hawkeye got insanely jealous when his father started to date a book-keeper. Hawkeye's father wanted his approval to marry this woman, and Hawkeye never gave it. So his father is alone to this day. Radar agrees and says if it doesn't work out with the teller, maybe they could introduce Hawkeye's father to his mom.

Margaret has the MIL (Mother in Law) from Hell; She refuses to acknowledge Houlihan's marriage to Donald and recommends good lawyers to Donald for divorce; when Donald put Margaret forth for DAR membership, his mother blackballed her. Winchester supports the MIL saying that DAR has standards and Houlihan wont fit in. The Boston baldy has no comfort and no sense for Margaret.

Klinger cried wolf too many times: his wife is divorcing him and no one believes him as he has already played that scenario before. Potter refuses to let a man go stateside for a Dear John letter, saying there would be nobody left to fight a war. Klinger tells Father Mulcahy he will go AWOL and borrows $20 from him. Mulcahy checks in on Klinger to find that he has gone and wakes Potter. Potter is worried sick. The next morning Klinger returns and Potter gives him an earful for putting himself in danger (if caught, Klinger could have ended in the stockade). Klinger tells Potter how he got himself a seat on a c-47 plane, but then realized what his wife had done to him and decided that is she doesn't deserve him, then he doesn't want her and then he came back to MASH, his real home.