- Host: A found object, in the Duchamp tradition, on a plinth. But the object is a 1970s glam-rock boot, and the plinth is made of foam-rubber. It's called "Coalmine 2". Why? I don't know...
- Joke Art: I HAD A FREUDIAN SLIP THE OTHER DAY. I MEANT TO SAY "PASS THE SALT" TO MY WIFE BUT IT CAME OUT AS "YOU STUPID BITCH YOU RUINED MY LIFE".
- Host: This is called "German Eggbanger". And those are really ugly colours. And that is a really ugly painting. But it's actually quite good! You know, when I think of an Artist trying to be ugly, you know, "I hate the World..."
- Host: I used to meet with Kippenberger at his Studio. If it was Evening, he'd be drinking. If it was Morning, he'd be recovering. The Artist of the Perpetual Hangover.
- Host: Kippenberger was amused Germany had an embarrassing past, and bought a Gas Station in South America, just so that he could have the answer machine say "Hello, Martin Boorman Gas Stations here..."
- Artist: So I said, "Could you Curse this Space for an Art Show?", and she said "If you affect, you will burn your little fingers" and I said "What?"
- Martin Kippenberger: We don't have a problem with women, because they know why.
- Martin Kippenberger: We don't have a problem with men, we are real gayboys.
- Gilbert & George: Gordon's makes us very drunk.
- Bruce Nauman: Run from Fear, Fun from Rear...