User reviews

My wife and I enjoy bad science fiction movies. Some movies are so bad they are good. Mansquito was one of those. That one was bad but it had some redeeming qualities. It makes you wonder how a self respecting actor approaches lines like "Hey! Mansquito!"

This one is so bad it has now taken its place as our standard for bad. It isn't just a bad movie, it really stinks. There was the coed strike force, the "Indian" that rode around in a black cloak and used a SWORD for crying out loud. He shot down a helicopter with an arrow!!

We tried to laugh at this movie but there were no points at which it didn't rise above pitiful. We couldn't come up with any redeeming features except for one. Those were the words "The End"

There seemed to be no plot, no character development, and no point to the movie. Someone in Hollywood needs to be fired.

This movie tries to rip off Predator, but that movie is much better. This movie has truly terrible special effects and a mindless plot. The team that enters the forest to find the cause of the disappearances of military and scientist is a combo of rough and rugged male delta commandos and pretty but tough female rangers. None of them are too bright. All the characters seem to be more than willing to run off into the forest alone and headfirst into a spear or sword and their death. Some of the pyrotechnics are very big and must have cost a bundle. But the close-ups of the creature are laughable as are most of the death scenes. Every cliché that the writers could think of was used. If you're looking for a mindless slaughter fest, this may fill the bill. The night I watched this was very slow so I sat through the whole thing. I have to admit that it's been a while since I watched something this bad. There is very little to redeem this movie. I'm amazed that junk like this gets produced.

This was so bad, I want God to give me an extra two hours of life having had to sit through it.

First off, the acting was uniformly bad. There was barely a plot, unless "Shaggy dog story with a guy in a rain poncho and skeleton mask instead of a dog" counts.

The editing was was all over the place, and the slow-mo shots of the "gore" (red corn syrup flying through the air--doubtless flung using a spoon) got irritating after the tenth time, and infuriating after the hundredth time.

I like Michael Rooker. He's done some good work. This was not good. This was less than good. And by that, I mean that it sucked. Hard.

For god's sake, don't watch this movie.

If you like to get a couple of fleeting glimpses of cleavage on some attractive women, there may be a second or two of enjoyment from this film. If you enjoy seeing poorly conceived and executed "action" scenes, there are plenty. If you are both blind and deaf, I still advise you to not have this film on in your presence. It is surely the worst or very close to the worst film I have ever seen. And it does appear that there was some money spent on it. Talk about throwing money away! As an editor, I would hope that the "editor(s?)" of this "movie" never again be allowed to edit a film, book, or even a post-it note. As a writer, I would hope that the author(s?) never again be allowed near even a broken crayon. You would think that I am not recommending that you view this movie. NOT so. Tape it (so you may stop your pain when you need to) and educate yourself as to how bad a movie can be.

Thank God for DVR and the high speed of it's fast forward. Even with that I couldn't sit through any more of that travesty. When they came across the old Indian asking for beans I gave up and erased it. Is this the best that SciFi Channel can come up with for Saturday nights? How about some old classics instead? The idea of a coed special forces unit was bad enough. It seems like they wanted to save money by having everything filmed out in the woods. What more can I say? It was so awful that I don't think I can come up with enough lines to qualify for space to review it. But, it looks like one more line will do it. Save your time, let alone your money on this dog of a film.

This ranks up there as the worst movies of all time. No research or thought at all went into this movie. Action scenes were thrown in at random intervals which made no sense in the context of the movie. Items appeared and disappeared at random, etc. It's obvious that this was directed by a "stunt coordinator", who should go back to his old job. The Skeleton Man rode a horse throughout the movie, which amazingly, could change color at will. Either that, or someone thought the audience would all be colorblind and not notice. Blood would be on the actors in 1 scene and the very next, miraculously disappear and then reappear. Seems that everyone connected with this movie forgot to check for inconsistencies.

A whole lot of the people that have seen this are confused, obviously. The original title of "Cottonmouth Joe" would've put things into better perspective for much of the viewing audience. I have personally experienced the condition of cottonmouth (often accompanied by a really bad hangover after a weekend bender) and it is indeed a lot like the movie Skeleton Man -- a dry, scummy film that provokes regret for recent choices and begs for a hot shower.

It is unfortunate that the choice of "Skeleton Man" for the title was finalized by the distributor (probably the work of some meddling Hollywood no nothing studio exec who just didn't get it) and not "Cottonmouth Joe." Those of us who have seen the film know that the Skeleton Man is actually Cottonmouth Joe (a skeletal-manish apparition, not a true Skeleton Man). The deception of the folks marketing this film is unforgivable, and for that alone, I cannot give this film a high rating. Imagine this: when future filmmakers get together to create the true definitive Skeleton Man movie and need a title, they will be totally screwed and we are all, as serious fans of the genre, diminished for that.

Cottonmouth Joe could've become a horror movie icon right up there alongside Madman Marz, Black Claw, Mansquito, Humongous, "Nature Boy" Billy Conners, Morty the wooden doll, the Boogen, Eegah, The Moon Beast, Bloody Bill, the Driller Killer, Mickey Rooney, and so forth, but he will always be remembered as a sword wielding-caped-tackle dummy skull face-tied to the side of a horse-skeleton man wannabe.

That's too bad.

Although Casper van Dien and Michael Rooker are generally relegated to B movies, even they are above this movie. It fails to convey even the slightest sense of excitement, fear, or dread -- unless you count the dread of sitting through the rest of this garbage. The direction is amateurish with annoying cuts and jerky movement that hides the fact that the killer is no where near the victims when he attacks. And what a killer he is: a cheap skull mask and a black hood. I liked him better when he was fighting He-Man. This is one of the laziest jobs of character design I've ever seen. I mean, it's Skeletor! And he's on a horse! This is supposed to be some scary, supernatural creature? How are we supposed to take this seriously? All we get is scenes of this dude riding around the woods on his horse -- which he can barely stay on -- interspersed with scenes of soldiers shooting randomly into the woods, thinking they can shoot a ghost. Occasionally, Skeletor will shoot someone with an arrow or ride by and stab someone, revealing how corny the effects really are. I generally enjoy Sci Fi channel fare on a basic cheese level, but this film is too inept for any level of enjoyment. Where's Dolph Lundgren when you need him???

Ill be honest. I bought this movie because it was part of a 4 Films Horror Collector's Set for $5 at Walmart. I got past the intro to the movie and realized why I only paid $1.25 for it. This movie is so bad its hilarious! I mean really, what is not to love about a poorly dressed skeleton man running along, shooting his bow and arrows at Helicopters and causing them to crash and explode. This movie has a horrible plot. I fast forwarded past all the boring parts and got to the killings.

Reasons the movie is great: 1. Skeleton Man has an arsenal of weapons at his disposal to include: Throwing knives, axes, a long sword, bow and arrow and a spear. Skeleton Man is so great that he can conjure these weapons magically. Imagine him walking towards with nothing in his hands and then BOOM an axe.

2. Skeleton Man can divert all bullets by getting on his horse and doing circles. In the movie the special forces team have their guns with unlimited ammo and try to shoot him, but in the end the all miss because Skeleton Man deflected all of them.

3. He rides a horse. Not just ANY horse. A brown majestic horse that looked like it was stolen from a farm. Its awesome because he is trying to give demons and their kind a better reputation. Black horses show that they have no taste but a brown horse really says something about that demon's character.

4. If Skeleton Man wants something that your standing in front of, he will punch a hole in your stomach, grab the object in question, and pull it through you. Sheer awesomeness.

5. Skeleton Man can bring a helicopter down to its knees just by shooting a piece of wood at it. Professional! What other demon do you know of that can take down a copter with a twig? NONE I SAY! This is a movie is perfect for stoners and people who like to laugh at retarded movies.

6/10 Because its just so damn funny.

The scientist Charles and his wife (or assistant) Marissa receive some objects and a skull from an ancient Indian cemetery, and while cleaning a vase, they are attacked and murdered by a mysterious being, the Skeleton Man. Then, a military squad commanded by Captain Leary (Michael Rooker) seeks out two groups of four soldiers each that vanished in the jungle. They face the Skeleton Man, shooting him while he kills each soldier. Then the Skeleton Man goes to a power plant, and Captain Leary explodes the facility destroying the supernatural being.

I bought "Skeleton Man" on DVD expecting to see a funny trash, but I found an awfully boring, annoying and senseless crap, with shoots and explosions. The imbecile story is totally disconnected and does not make any sense, and the military team is composed of imbeciles, insisting in shooting the supernatural Skeleton Man until they are totally slaughtered. Their leader is also the most stupid, with the blow-up of an entire facility in the end to destroy the supernatural rip-off of the extraterrestrial warrior Predator. On DVD, it is possible to use the fast forward button along the movie and reduce the suffering of the viewer. My vote is two.

Title (Brazil): "Skeleton Man"

Anytime someone asks me what is the worse movie I've ever seen, Skeleton Man always comes to mind.

I tell people to watch just to see how dumb it is. It is probably good for a laugh if you like horrible movies.

Or maybe it would be amusing if you were on drugs. I'm guessing the writers and directors were when they made this.

Seriously, how does something like this even make it this far? I'm pretty sure my 15 year old nephew could make something better on his computer.

So if you are in the mood to see how bad a movie can be, and you can download it or whatever for free, then go for it!

For the most time it was like a "Predator" for much less fastidious ones. The rest of the movie was just a bunch of scenes, tied together only by characters, one can say. We can see a group of soldiers on an undercover mission and vicious Skeleton Man. Who is hunting who? Guess! One thing that this movie provides us with when it comes to the main characters group and "Predator" didn't are 4 not bad looking girls with mean guns. But the rest... We see that female soldier hiding behind a branch, then walking somewhere, then again behind that branch. All they do is just walking... and walking... Sure, they are looking for something. But sometimes it feels like even director didn't know what is it. And again, those scenes completely without any trace of sense... If you manage to stand half of this movie, you will witness a scene with grand theft truck. Why the hell did he do that?? You will ask many questions like that after seeing this. I think 2 quotes of one of the characters sum this movie up pretty well. "It makes no sense" and my personal favorite "Whatever you do, don't fall asleep" So why did I give this movie 5 stars? Because I just love this kind of low-budget, silly-story and sense-lacking flicks! It have no suspense whatsoever, no sense, it's badly acted (yet I liked Rooker), special effects are like taken from a movie made 30-40 years ago, it shows no logic in what characters do, scenes are packed together in a box, mixed and showed at random. It's really, really bad. And still I had my fun watching it. If you're into this kind of movies, so will you.

Seriously i could not have asked for a better movie. It had everything. It had Action, Intrigue, Scandal, and Romance. This movie will forever go down as a great in my book. When i first saw it that fateful night i laughed, i cried, and i crapped blood. When my mom asked me what was wrong i could only offer this strained reply, "Skeleton Man!"

Specials effects reach Star Wars proportions. Blood and gore are as good as it gets and believe me there are tons of it. Also the plot reminds me of a classic novel, like War and Peace or something.

I don't really know what else to say but that if you see one movie this year be sure it is Skeloton Man!!!!!!!!

p.s. i have read all the other reviews of this movie and i cant believe that people could find this movie bad. i mean i'd take this movie over any other movie that came out. EVER

Awful. Lazy. Incompetent. Failure. Horrendous. Insulting. Lackadaisical. Guano. Excrement. Depressing. Talentless. Baffling. Draining. Lousy. Anti-life. Joyless. Avoid. Hopeless. Unprofessional. Worthless. I'd-almost-rather-watch-Uwe-Boll-filmography-kind-of-film.

In a word, bad!

Skeleton Man is what happens when you give money to people that have no idea how films, or even more broadly, stories function. It has absolutely no creativity, talent or skill behind it. And what's even worse, it's not even that funny in its incompetence. Often you can at least laugh at how utterly the film fails, but in this case you just simply sit there, bored out of your skull, asking the question: "Why?"

Where to even begin. First of all, the props. The villain, supposedly an undead Indian warrior spirit, who actually looks more like a fourteen-year-old fanboy cosplaying as Skeletor from He-Man. Seriously, I could buy a more convincing skull mask from any carnival store in existence. The same thing with the cape, which is so shiny, smooth and plasticy that you could use it as a mirror. Made even more baffling by the fact that in about half of the scenes they use a far superior cape. Did they simply decide not to re-shoot the scenes with the hilariously wrong cape after the right one had arrived?

Secondly, the actors and the characters are some of the worst I've ever seen. They're either needlessly pampering to the male demographic, utterly avoid of any personality or usually both. Worst is the villain, who has no presence, character or even really backstory. I've seen kittens covered in soap bubbles that are more frightening than he is.

This film should not exist. It is an insult to every other film, nay, every other story in existence. Please, do the world a favour and burn any copy you come across.

I'll be honest, I knew from the idea that it was not going to be great, but I saw it because I wanted to see if Skeleton Man could at least be better as a movie than the idea it sprung from. No chance of that! Although I have seen about 5 bad SyFy movies in a row, Skeleton Man in my opinion has to be the worst. There have been worse-looking SyFy movies before, but that doesn't excuse the far-too-rapid editing, dull scenery and terrible make-up. There are countless continuity errors as well, including blood appearing and disappearing and scars on one side of a face and one minute on the other side. And Skeleton Man is a joke, and a bad, cheap and completely lacking in menace, and I do think the film could've done at least with an adequate explanation of how the horse could change colour at will. The dialogue is very unfocused and awkward with nothing standing out, the story is an insult even to the word threadbare and is handled in an un-suspenseful and predictable manner complete with numerous and inexcusable mistakes in regard to the military(furthermore showing that SyFy don't do their research properly) and the character are underdeveloped clichés. The acting is poor, with a wooden Casper Van Dien and Michael Rooker trying hard but really this role is beneath him. The climax is completely uninteresting, in fact Skeleton Man's sole bright spot is the protracted scene where Rooker falls down a steep hill. Other than that, the movie is utter garbage. 1/10 Bethany Cox