Duck! The Carbine High Massacre

i saw this a couple of years ago. i wouldn't normally post my opinion here, but since someone else already has, i'll just say this - i thought this is one of the worst films ever. bad acting, bad script, bad cinematography. bad, bad, bad all around. it looks like a school project made by kids who have no concept of what makes a good film.

i thought it might have some redeeming qualities - like actually having a message or original story - but it didn't. it doesn't look like a spoof at all. it looks like these kids wanted to make a schlocky gore version of the real tragedy for their friends because they weren't satisfied with still pictures in the news or the few clips from CCTV available on the internet.

i had no idea this was listed on IMDb, and i wasn't even aware there was any public controversy about it until recently. if the controversy was so intense that the FBI had to get involved (though i can't understand why), that might be the only historical value this film has.

Avoid this "movie".

Yes the acting is bad the editing is bad the script is bad... but that's what makes it so perfect. Whether it's actually meant to be a comedy or not, me and my friends were laughing the entire time. Its actually so funny to watch and if that was on purpose, that's even better. If you want something that's actually informative and high-quality about school shootings like columbine though, you probably wouldn't like it.

I guess I'm in the minority here, but I loved this movie. I'm familiar with William Hellfire and Factory 2000's early output, so I knew what I was in for. That may have helped. Still, I was initially put off by the first twenty or so minutes. I expected this content to be taken a little more seriously. Once I understood the tone they were going for, I got it, and loved it.

There are some disturbing moments in this, but tongue is firmly in cheek through the entire film. It pokes fun at the cliques in high school, the clueless parents (which are ALL played by the same two people, I found this to be a funny gag), American media's obsession with violence. The massacre at the end gets fairly graphic and uncomfortable to watch at times, but the black humor still shines through.

If you're looking for an offensive but intelligently done low (LOW) budget flick, I can't recommend this one enough. One of Factory 2000's best films.

If you are a fan of William Hellfire, Joey Smack, Misty Mundae, or E.I./Alternative Cinema (even though this isnt an e.i. release), then I STRONGLY urge you to buy this movie. I know that the only copies you're going to find are going to be around $40, but it IS worth it, if you collect films from this genre.

You knew it would happen...a spoof (and a hilarious one, at that) of the infamous Columbine High School shootings. Sure, you may go to Hell just for contributing to the film-maker, but what a fun, amusing way to get there! Let's just hope Hell has air-conditioned private rooms with kitchenettes and a big TV set so you can watch all your favorite underground movies....

Anyway, you know the story... I won't even get into that... But the best part of this movie is the "startling" truth behind the excessive media frenzy that follows such violent, shocking crimes, putting the killers on a pedastal like some sort of false idol. Plus, it's somewhat nice and refreshing to see Misty Mundae give a memorable performance without taking off all her clothes and rolling around licking other women's various bodyparts.

My only gripe about this movie is that it takes a little bit too long for the actual bloodshed to start flowing (I say that because I'm a downright gorehound...). But when it does, it is actually pretty brutal and gross, so it's all good. William Hellfire and Joey Smack are perfect as the two idiot "anarchist" teenagers with murder on their minds. A VERY funny, VERY low-budget, and VERY memorable movie.

I review another flick with Joe Ned because it wasn't listed on IMDb This flick here is one that people do search so therefore I will review another Tina Krause flick that not that many people has seen. Chloroformed And Cloned Co-Ed. It is out on shock-o-rama VHS and is OOP and very obscure. It's just a piece of trash with really bad acting but what makes it collectible is the fact that Tina Krause is in it, known for her nudity and that is what she does here. From the first minute until the last minute she is walking around with her juggs to show. Only a few times she goes full frontal. The tape I received didn't had any year on it it was made and there's nothing to find on the Web.

The story goes that Suzy Johnson (Tina Krause) and her boyfriend are adding some new kicks towards there sexlife. But Suzy ends up dead after an experiment with chloroform and electrocution. A deranged medical student clones Suzy 16 times. But they all escape and enters a house with a German butcher who only likes to violate them. The story looks promising but it all looks like a spoof. Bad bad acting and only the juggs of Tina are acting better than the thespians themselves. It's ultra low budget, just look at the electrocution scene, the light goes out and back on and it repeats but you can easily hear that someone is playing with the switch.

Total crap but collectible due a few reasons, first, Tina Krause, but also in the acting is John Bacchus who went further to direct a lot of erotic spoofs and flicks. Maybe the best known Play-mate Of The Apes (2002). Alan Spence just turned up one more time as cinematographer in The Vampire's Seduction (1998). Joe Ned also went further as writer and producer in the erotic business. G.W Lawrence was also involved but can't say if it was him as seen in Play Dead (1998)? If you want to see early shock-o-rama's just before Misty Mundae became involved, also seen a lot together with Tina Krause then it's a hunt worthy. Give it 2 on 10 Gore 0/5 Nudity 3/5 Effects 0/5 Story 1/5 Comedy 0/5