Heist Movie? Action Movie? Disaster Movie? Fails at ALL!
"Firetrap" opens as a technological heist movie in the vein of "The Score" or "The Italian Job". Its an adequate enough "Mission Impossible"-inspired opener as Dean Cain squirrels his way through a highly survielled museum (?) to snatch a diamond. Of course he's being helped by the classic sidekick who eats chocolate in a truck and helps him with directions. He starts off as the irritating token black dude, and he only gets more and more annoying.
"Go on with your bad self," he says in one scene. No one can argue with me that he's not the token black dude after such a line. If anyone still should want to, here's some more evidence: "You da man!" So the heist opener is pleasant enough. It quickly shifts into an action picture with a fun shootout and a surprisingly well-done car chase. Heist thriller and action adventure can be a fun mix, so "Firetrap" caught my attention. Until...
After the attention-grabbing beginning, it's time for some good old-fashioned character exposition. This is where his boring, bland, Hallmark-ish family attachment is introduced. His bangin' wife divorced him because of his criminal involvement that led him straight to the slammer. Wanna hear something original? "Just one more job!" He imploringly says.
I can live with a couple clichés in a generic heist/action flick. So I kept watching. Dean and his token black friend for hire train and plan to knock off a company that is quickly going under. So off Dean goes for the score of his life, covertly dressed as a cop to get him in the building.
Then something unfortunate happens: it turns into a burning building escape movie "Inferno"-style. This threw my attention (and approval)off like a train being derailed. If there's one sure way to make a bad movie, it's to ineptly try to bind many genres together. The director whose name sounds a lot like Harry Dunn from "Dumb and Dumber" seemingly has a fitting name. His movie is a complete mess that starts off mildly entertaining, then goes up in flames with an unwatchable second half.
"Go on with your bad self," he says in one scene. No one can argue with me that he's not the token black dude after such a line. If anyone still should want to, here's some more evidence: "You da man!" So the heist opener is pleasant enough. It quickly shifts into an action picture with a fun shootout and a surprisingly well-done car chase. Heist thriller and action adventure can be a fun mix, so "Firetrap" caught my attention. Until...
After the attention-grabbing beginning, it's time for some good old-fashioned character exposition. This is where his boring, bland, Hallmark-ish family attachment is introduced. His bangin' wife divorced him because of his criminal involvement that led him straight to the slammer. Wanna hear something original? "Just one more job!" He imploringly says.
I can live with a couple clichés in a generic heist/action flick. So I kept watching. Dean and his token black friend for hire train and plan to knock off a company that is quickly going under. So off Dean goes for the score of his life, covertly dressed as a cop to get him in the building.
Then something unfortunate happens: it turns into a burning building escape movie "Inferno"-style. This threw my attention (and approval)off like a train being derailed. If there's one sure way to make a bad movie, it's to ineptly try to bind many genres together. The director whose name sounds a lot like Harry Dunn from "Dumb and Dumber" seemingly has a fitting name. His movie is a complete mess that starts off mildly entertaining, then goes up in flames with an unwatchable second half.
- Nick_Dets
- Jul 26, 2005