Held for Ransom

I actually enjoyed this old-school suspense thriller. Better than most, not as good as some -- but all in all a good rental when HBO, "Skinemax" and Showtime are running re-runs! Dennis Hopper is his normal, crazy self and many 70's stars appear.

I picked this one up from Blockbuster last week. This was a straight to video release, which usually puts up some red flags. It was actually quite good for the budget. There were several past stars in this movie, Morgan Fairchild, Joan Van Ark, The oldest Son from Home Improvement and Dennis Hopper. I would recommend this for a rental but not necessarily one to buy.

I will never see that $4.25 again. Why did I rent this movie?

I sit here, in utter shock at just how terribly awful this movie was, on practically all accounts. Oh, how naive I used to be, to think that even the worst movie would have some redeeming qualities. This one had none whatsoever.

The wretchedness of the acting was obscured only by the abysmal script. The basic plot line (high school students from wealthy families, kidnapped and held captive in the Everglades), if it had been used to its full potential, could have become a C-minus teen thriller.

I would typically call a poorly developed character "two dimensional." Now, to call ANY of the characters in this waste of perfectly good celluloid as "one dimensional" would be an obsequious compliment. There WERE no characters in this movie. Just bad guys and worse guys.

My recurring thought throughout the movie was "Please, please, Mr. Alligator, just eat SOMEBODY, ANYBODY, EVERYBODY." In this small thing I was not disappointed.

Stay away from this movie! Stay away! Please, please, for the love of all that is good and decent, STAY AWAY!

I only rented this movie to see Morgan Fairchild and Joan Van Ark, who turn out to each have about three lines of dialogue in the movie as the kidnapped teens' moms. I don't understand why these well-known women were hired only to be given three lines... Anyway, this is one of the most boring, stupid movies I've seen in a long time. It was absolutely awful. It's confusing because Dennis Hopper and Debi Mazar, who are in lots of other things, are in this trash. Why would they bother with doing such a low-budget movie?

How many times can character "J. D." say Ef You in a movie? Were they going for a record here?

Aging dolls Joan Van Ark and Morgan Fairchild are brought in for name recognition. They get 3 lines each! And there is no epilogue after the mastermind behind the crime is revealed.

Interesting plot, good story line. But the movie just drags on with Hopper cursing and swearing. It could have been much, much better.

5 stars out of 10, only because the suspense is good.