Tender Flesh

When it comes to sexploitation films, nobody serves 'em up like Jess Franco; and this one is no exception. It has an outstanding exotic dancing scene (forget Showgirls), lots of sex of every make and manner, gratuitous nudity, it even has Lina Romay and she still looks pretty hot, some big time S&M, and, for the sportsmen out there, the is even some hunting; albeit it people getting hunted. If you are looking for good acting and great plot, look elsewhere. If you want bare boobs, lotsa girls kissing girls, and maybe a bit of action, then check out this.

When I started watching this, I instantly noticed that I couldn't understand what anyone was saying. I turned up the volume. With background noises now booming out, I could hear the voices. Just what are the actors saying? Is the movie not dubbed? Are they speaking Spanish? After some confusion, I realize that it was English. At least, I think so... The Amazing Jess Franco has placed the microphones too far away from the actors. As a result, we cannot completely hear what they are saying. He's done this before. But maybe this is Mr. Franco's intention? By not knowing what people are saying, we are thrown into some mystery about what is going on, and are left with more visual clues... Maybe it's just me, but I would have liked to know what was going on! How about a few hints? The basic premise (I refuse to call it a "plot") concerns a young American exotic dancer named Paula (played by Amber Newman) who has a boyfriend who gets her invited to a small island owned by some sleazy rich people. It is somewhere off the coast of Spain. For this visit, a large cash payment is promised to Paula, which the boyfriend gets. He then escapes from the island, only to return later. Why? Pay close attention to the scene where the boyfriend opens Paula's US passport. Though his hand tried to cover it up, you can see the actress' REAL name, Amber Newman, printed below the photo on the bottom of the passport!! Anyway, back to the "story": There are some other sleazy, rich, beautiful characters visiting the island, all with ambiguous motives. We witness sadistic games (are they real or fake?) and unappealing dining scenes. But the food must be good, as a phony French chef prepared it! There is a young woman servant who runs around naked and never speaks. Is she really mute? And do we care? Of course all the women are mostly naked throughout this film... Oh well, we can at least be thankful that the (50+ and overweight) men remain clothed! In addition to the abysmal sound quality, what I have always marveled at about Jess Franco is his amazing ability to film beautiful naked women in such a way that leaves the viewer completely turned off. This film is no exception – I needed fresh air after watching it!

In conclusion: I am happy to report that regardless of what Mr. Franco can dream up, I am still attracted to women.

I consider myself a fan of Jess Franco and his trash movies, but nearly every time I see one of them, I just see missed opportunities and plots that don't play out well. This film is, unfortunately, no different. The film certainly had a lot of potential, as Franco has fused the intriguing theme of the classic film 'The Most Dangerous Game' with his usual brand of trashy sleaze, but the plot here gets lost too often, and it takes an eternity for Franco to get round to the main point of the movie. With this being a later Franco film, you might be forgiven for thinking that the director would have got better, but actually I've found that the opposite is true; as this and the terrible 'Killer Barbys' are two of his very worst films. The plot focuses on a stripper and her sleazy boyfriend. The pair is invited to a private island by a rich woman and her lover. However, they soon find that they haven't been invited there for social reasons as they are 'released' on the island so that the wealthy woman and her friends can hunt them down for sport!

What attracted me to this film was the front cover and the fact that it was directed by the king of sleaze flicks. You'd think, then, that I'd be pleased that the movie features a plethora of sex scenes and general sleaze; but I'm not. The reason for this is mostly that the sex and sleaze in the film is really boring and most of the time served only in giving me the condition known as 'itchy fast forward finger'. However, my inclination to see everything through to the end ensured that I had to lump it. There was a time when I didn't think girl-on-girl could possibly be boring, but I have since been proved wrong. The only positive I can pluck out the movie really is that the soundtrack is quite catchy, and despite it being silly foreign pop music; actually blends quite well with the sex scenes. I did enjoy the last ten minutes; as that's when the plot finally got going, but it was a case of too little too late and unfortunately, this is a severely lacklustre film. On the whole, I only recommend this film to those who feel they must see all 180+ Franco movies...everyone else should watch Vampyros Lesbos, Faceless or She Killed in Ecstasy instead.

I'm more than slightly embarrassed to admit that I'm a fan of some of Jess Franco's earlier output, but "Tender Flesh" is simply indefensible. No one watches a Franco film for great storytelling, true, but his better movies are likeable despite their flaws, and draw in aficionados of the bizarre with their surreal atmosphere, off-the-wall sets and fashions, and groovy music. "Tender Flesh" has none of these strengths; it's just a tired walk over old ground. Franco's done a version of "The Most Dangerous Game" before ("The Perverse Countess"), also with a naked Lina Romay (who looked great in the buff twenty years ago in "Female Vampire"; not here, though), but this "remake of a remake" has none of the off-kilter, loopy feel of that film. I didn't find it bizarre, shocking, or even entertaining, merely dull. Pick this up if and only if you have an unquenchable desire for Franco, no matter how loudly he scrapes the bottom of the barrel.

I know...Jess Franco has directed a so many trash movies, even he can't remember them all! But this one is one of his best. It's action packed, erotic and fun to watch. The acting and the script are a lot better than the average Franco film. It's Hard Target with a twist. Not just for fans: Tender Flesh is a festival of sex and action that'll blow up your mind and will make you want to see it over and over again!