- Airport Information Clerk: I do this in the name of sports-watching, romantically-minded men; a maligned, misunderstood minority.
- Pedersen: You didn't come to see me to make a decision. You came to me because you didn't like the decision you'd already made.
- Laurence: Of course I wasn't alright. I'd just been knocked unconscious and now an American, who'd never driven a stick shift, was driving my car down the wrong side of the road.
- Martha: [to Frank] I'm a little bit older than six. The only people interested in you are six year old girls.
- Laurence: In finding the right person you need someone with all the right similarities, yet all the right differences. Someone to read your mind instinctively, yet cover your weaknesses.
- Frank: There's nothing more boring than looking at paintings. Only reason anyone ever comes to an art gallery is to get laid.
- Martha: [seeing the entrance to Laurence's flat] Wow, this is great. In my apartment, I'd have to walk up 16 stories. The elevator works okay, but it's strictly for drug deals and contract fellatio.