Tromeo and Juliet

This trash version of `Romeo and Juliet' passes in Manhattan in the present days. Romeo (Will Keenan) is an a**hole and violent member of family Que, and Juliet (Jane Jensen) is a sexy (with beautiful legs and breasts) and bisexual girl of Capulet family. The scatological situations this romantic pair will face are very funny. Although being a cult movie (inclusive exhibited in Rio de Janeiro Festival), it is not recommended for all the audiences. If the viewer is fan of Peter Jackson's former movies (`Braindead', `Bad Taste'), `Toxic Avenger', `Body Melt' and other trash movie, he will certainly love this flick. Otherwise, he will hate it. Since I belong to the first group, my vote is eight.

Yes!! They finally got it down to perfection. What a great idea, a refreshing exploitation epic for Generation-X, whether they know it or not. After disasters like Sgt. Kabukiman NYPD, and getting screwed by Blockbuster, our hero, Lloyd Kaufman just decided to go for it, stop catering to distributors, and let Troma be all the Troma it can be. Lloyd would make this one the most unapologetic, outlandish and downright hilarious Troma movie yet. This time, Lloyd takes Shakespeare's love story, turns it inside out, Tromatizes it, and adds that long, lost, entertainment value it was always lacking. Entertainment value, such as Lemmy Kilmister (the narrator), Debbie Rochon (the cook), Joe Fleishaker (the fat guy), and of course, brutal mutilations and toilet humor. Tromeo And Juliet is the definitive edition of a rather lackluster story, and the crown jewel of the Troma universe.

Years ago, in Tromaville, N.J. business partners, Monty Que and Cap Capulet start a film company called Silky Films, which would produce supposedly tasteful, soft core films. Monty considers Cap his friend, but Cap is out to screw the poor sucker out of his share of the company. On paper, and in books, it appears that Monty gave away his life's work for free. Fast forward to mid-90's Manhattan, we have two families who are extremely displeased with one another, it's to the point that they're just looking for a reason to take a limb, or preferably, a life. Monty has a son, Tromeo, nephew, Benny, they, with their friend, Murray Martini, who's just a little too excited about all the carnage, wage war on the incestuous Capulets, except Monty, he's too drunk to care. Like in the original, there is a confusing situation, leading to Tromeo falling for Cap's daughter, who he has never met, or never even knew about. Unfortunately, Cap is a sadistic pervert, who, not unlike Tromeo's dad, has a thing for the bottle, and this would of course, lead to daddy's little chenshaw melon being physically, and emotionally abused, and molested, and kept in a Plexiglas cage, off and on, depending on how foul of a mood Cap is in. Cap is also forcing his vegetarian daughter to marry London Arbuckle, a billionaire butcher, who, would make just about anyone uneasy, with or without the raisin loaf. With all these inconveniences, the young lovers feel that eloping would be the best decision, but how will this effect the big feud? It might, or might not, go a little something like the original, but figuring out how this one ends up is just simply not going to happen, you'll never see it coming.

"The one with Leo" is downright sleep-inducing compared to Tromeo & Juliet, but if watered-down, over-directed, big-budget, Hollywood, Garbage is what you've been programmed to go for, then by all means, go for it, but if you're in the mood for something a little more colorful, something that really packs a punch, and doesn't follow the "normal" movie pattern, and if you happen to have a rather abnormal sense of humor, then you just might not hate this movie. Tromeo And Juliet gives the finger to all that is mainstream. Full-blast exploitation with as much mean-spirited humor as anything from a young John Waters. Along with some badass acting, Tromeo And Juliet flaunts a thunderous score which includes the legendary Motorhead, and not to mention, much input from James Gunn, that really brought this one together. For more awesomeness from James Gunn, check out Lollilove, and for more excellence from Lloyd Kaufman, check out his next vision, Terror Firmer. Tromeo And Juliet is jaw-droppingly priceless Exploitation for the 90's brought to us by the one, and only, king of the B-movies. Thank's, Lloyd. 10/10

I know very little of Shakespeare's personality, so I haven't a clue as to how he would've felt had he seen this masterfully perverse retelling of his work. I don't much care either. I firmly believe he would have liked this one better than the Leo and Claire version. I also firmly believe that Troma will never cease to amaze us all. Every time they make a film they work with a budget smaller than the life-savings of a third-world peasant, and the cast is dominated by more amateur actors than a school play, and yet, the film flows smoother than wine, and the performances are like platinum. Troma will likely never be surpassed in terms of cult following with a feel that is endearingly John Watersesque. If you like Troma, don't pass this up. If you've never seen Troma, let this be your first. If you hate Troma, then s***w ya.

Tromeo And Juliet is a funny movie. It's a good movie. It's a cool movie. And even a perverted and violent movie. But above all it is a weird movie. Bill Shakespere wouldn't just roll over in his grave if he saw this he'd probably spin like a top. There's a lot to be said for a movie that has a person in the credits under the title "stunt nipple". The found a peanut bouncing head is hilarious, but not as funny as the guy picking up his brain and futily trying to put it back in his head while crying. The religious hymn of "Job We Gather At The River" each time someone dies brings happy recollections of the opening moments in The Wild Bunch. This is definately a good movie. Watch it sober your first time around however.

TROMEO AND JULIET (3+ outta 5 stars)

Well, you gotta give this movie points for sheer nerve, if nothing else. Basing a low budget sex-and-violence schlock-fest on one of the greatest Shakespearean romances... it's probably not one of the best ideas ever. But, you know what? It works! Not for everyone, mind you... you need to have a high tolerance for sick humour, bloody special effects, gratuitous nudity and Shakespearean soliloquies. Actually they trimmed a lot of the William S. dialogue after test audiences didn't approve (go figure)... but the plot is still the same. Tromeo and Juliet, belonging to two different families with a lot of bad blood between them, meet and fall in love and decide to go against their families' wishes and be together. Tragedy and violence follow... as well as copious amounts of sleaze. I've seen a few movies from Troma Pictures and they are all basically the same... but I think this is probably their best effort.