Future Kick

Cyborgs, space ships, VR and strippers oh my! Not only does it have actions but it has BOOBS! I mean a LOT of boob action. I would rename this film to "Future Boobs". This is a entertaining 90's B action film that should not be taken serious but rather with glass of wine or many shots. I would say this film would be a great drinking night movie because it has so many scenes where they completely rip off scenes from Total Recall and Terminator.

I give this 7 future kicks to the face out of 10.

Don "The Dragon" Wilson stars as Walker a nominal cyborg (A cyborg that can get drunk.) who helps Meg Foster find out who killed her husband while battling Chris Penn in the process and dodging bad guys in the hell that is earth in the 21st century. Future Kick is easily the weakest of my robot movie binge and the reason is because it's been so badly put together that any idea of science fiction is lost in the kickboxing chaos. If said action sequences were good, things would be interesting but alas, Damian Klaus fuses these sequences with the excitement of golf and hence the film just slogs through its predictable plot points with uninspired dreariness. The film also seems to be patched with stock footage, and the film's special effects are lame. Aside from a few scenes of heart rippings and decapitations the film just has nothing in its favor. The movie also features a stupid ending, a really confusing explanation as to who Don Wilson's character is and worst of all is the sheer uninspired way it all plays out. Science Fiction can often be exciting and enjoyable when low budget filmmakers really try hard to take advantage of ideas but when they rip off better movies and lack the decency to flow without energy you get movies like Future Kick. A movie devoid of brains, excitement and watch-ability. Future Kick is really quite an awful movie.

* out of 4-(Bad)

This is a awful movie. Very ugly to look at and made zero sense. Action was dull and everyone looked bored. Truly terrible. Pass on this one.

I can't imagine Don 'The Dragon' Wilson ever having played in one single decent film. Once again he's starring in a whole heap of inconsistent rubbish with so many ridiculous elements thrown into the plot, that the movie just becomes insane. Main man Don plays a Cyberon - part human, part machine - and he's the last of his kind. Apparently the government wants him eliminated, but that is of no importance to the plot. Because this movie is about Meg Foster - who's very much sleepwalking her way through this flick - who lives on the moon but comes to the earth because her husband scientists got killed there. But there's also an evil corporation which illegally traffics human body parts, so that's also what this movie is about. But actually, the main villain is a serial killer running around ripping people's hearts out, so this film is about him. Also, this film is simply about a series of titty bars, because futuristic cities are a cesspool of depravity, as to be expected. And then we have a (cyber-)game called 'Laserblade', which is also of importance to the plot. Are you still following? Doesn't matter, because it's all a giant bunch of nonsense without any logic to it. And what on earth was Chris Penn doing in this stinker? He's playing a cyborg who gets to kick-box against Don near the end. Some more redeeming qualities this movie has: a decapitation, two head explosions, a full body explosion, a cut-off finger and a lot of naked tits. Since this is a Roger Corman production, Corman took the liberty of splicing in footage from a lot of other movies produced by him; mainly special outer-space effects footage (from "Galaxy Of Terror" & "Forbidden World") and naked tits (from "Stripped To Kill II: Live Girls"). How cheap can you get, Roger? The conclusion of the film is downright stupid, but it does explain why nothing in it for 70 minutes long makes any sense at all. Seeing is believing. And I saw it. Otherwise I could not have imagined how an unbelievable heap of rubbish "Future Kick" is. Now you go watch it. You know you want to.

This is a remarkably bad movie, even by Don Wilson's meager standards. I'm sure there are folks in the world who enjoy low-budget, sci-fi B-movies and for whom FUTURE KICK fulfills some personal niche, but for me, this is just lousy, unimaginative filmmaking, the only good thing about which is that it sets a low standard to which all future Don Wilson sci-fi outings thankfully rise above.

The story: In a dystopian future where corporations control the world, a wealthy female moon-dweller (Meg Foster) arrives on earth to track down her husband's murderer - a task for which she enlists the aid of the last member of a race of lethal androids (Wilson).

Give cult producer Roger Corman credit for being game enough to give every weirdo script that fell into his lap a chance; a filmmaker would *have* to be pretty indiscriminant to try and make something of this. Mind you, this isn't to say that the script co-written by Catherine Cyran couldn't have been made into a decent film, but rather that the movie makers were foolish to attempt it on what must have been a small budget. With a plot that clearly outweighs this one's financial resources, the results include embarrassing computer effects, cheapo sets that hardly convey it's a futuristic setting, and a perpetually dark lighting scheme. This last aspect is the worst for me: absolutely every scene is filmed in shadow, making the movie an entirely depressing experience.

The film features five fight scenes; three of them are crud and the other two (including a showdown between Wilson and his late friend Chris Penn) are only marginally better - all thanks to that awful lighting scheme. Beyond that, there's only a car chase to see, and a bucketload of gore. This one's clearly the bloodiest flick Wilson ever starred in, but even that isn't worth seeing the film for by itself. Characters are lucky if they're two-dimensional, seeing as some (e.g. Don Wilson himself) are completely lacking in character at all. Bad guy Eb Lottimer goes through the whole movie stabbing people and ripping their hearts out, but at the end he's still the most boring serial killer you'll ever see.

What else can I say? I have nothing substantially good to write about this one. Admittedly, I've never been a fan of Don Wilson's movies, but this is the absolute low for him. I don't often blame a single movie for ensuring a director's success or lack of, but man, am I not surprised that Damian Klaus hasn't made another picture since this one.