3 de Coeur

Those three words are the only way I can describe this movie. This movie was supposed to be about lesbians? where was the kissing etc? Kelly Lynch is fabulous in the Showtime series "The L Word" as Ivan so I expected to see her playing a believable lesbian. This was not the case with this character. The Baldwin brother had a look on his face the whole movie like he was half asleep. The script was predictable and anticlimactic. Soundtrack was okay (thanks Joe Jackson). If you have insomnia, watch this, you'll fall asleep. I tried to give this movie a chance, almost turned it off after 50 min, but I stuck it out hoping it would get better. It didn't. Don't waste your time on this flop.

I didn't expect much of Three of Hearts; indications were that it was something of a dog, and both Billy Baldwin and Sherilyn Fenn aren't exactly reknowned for their choice of projects. So I was quite pleasantly surprised that the film turned out to be a savvy, passably witty little comedy. The locations are well used and both Baldwin and Fenn turn in entertaining performances. Towering above them, though, is Kelly Lynch. Funny, sassy and utterly adorable, she fits the part like a glove, and turns the potentially least interesting role of the threesome into a character to treasure. Inevitably, the film suffers a little when she is offscreen.

6.5/10

Honestly you can watch this thing in fast forward and still understand the gist of the movie, because that's exactly what I did. I think all the actors did a decent job (I've seen Kelly Lynch in other things and she's great), but the plot was wretched and the characters were flimsy. Who acts like these people?

Here's a run down of the main characters: Connie: too over-the-top pathetic Ellen: Hot, but not interesting Joe: WTF!! The moral transformation- "bad boy turned good" was phony.

Actually the only great character was played by Joe Pantoliano. Maybe the movie should have been about him and not these confused and hard-up people.

In New York City, Ellen Armstrong (Sherilyn Fenn) needs some space from her girlfriend Connie Czapski (Kelly Lynch). A heart-broken Connie needs a date for a wedding. She hasn't come out to her old traditional Polish neighborhood or family. She decides to hire male escort Joe Casella (William Baldwin). He works for Mickey (Joe Pantoliano) who also runs a sex phone line. Connie comes up with a devious plan. Joe would break Ellen's heart so that she would come running back to Connie.

Joey Pants, Harvey, and the phone sex line are all trying to inject humor into the movie with limited success. If anything, I would cut out those parts. They don't have the same tone as the story with the main trio. They do generate the reason for Joe to move in with Connie which may not be a good thing since it muddied the waters of their budding friendship. The reason is still pretty thin and it doesn't make sense that Connie is so trusting of Joe so quickly.

Within it all, building their friendship is the heart of this movie. Instead, the filmmaker seems to be stuck with the male fantasy of turning lesbians. Well, Ellen seems to be bi at least. The movie is stuck with some of this more awkward aspects instead of nurturing its more heart-warming aspects. It takes a long arduous road but eventually it gets to the right place. This is a flawed indie and it's not that well made either.

This movie had three of the most important things to look for in a film. It was full of cute guys and gals. I mean, no one on Earth is better looking than Billy Baldwin. Plus the two leading ladies are absolutely gorgeous. It had fun little jokes that were repeated throughout the movie. Plus the plot was totally twisted. A girl who is bi-sexual, Ellen, breaks up with her girlfriend, Connie, who then hires a male escort, Joe, to go to her sister's wedding. They finish the "date" and go back to his place to find it vandalized by a ex-con. Connie takes Joe back to her place and tells him he can stay there. While he's there he can help Connie get Ellen back. From there on out it gets really twisted. Every one needs to see this movie.