- [last lines]
- Papa Reilly: There's a bit of a traveler in everybody, Tito. But very few of us know where we're goin'.
- Ossie: What's his name?
- Grandfather: Um, he's called Tír na nÓg.
- Ossie: What does it mean?
- Grandfather: It's the land of eternal youth.
- Ossie: But why's he called that?
- Grandfather: He's from Tir na nÓg, the land under the sea.
- [first lines]
- Papa Reilly: [to his son] You're not gonna return there again. You have to pretend your name is Murphy. Do you understand that?
- Traveller: When you through a stone in a lake, it's not happy 'til it hits the bottom. Make sure he doesn't drag us all down with him.
- Grandfather: [about the horse] He's from Tír na nÓg, a land over the sea.
- [to the people gathered around the fire]
- Grandfather: Now then, Oisin was the most handsome traveller that ever lived and the princess told him that he was too handsome to ever grow old. She took him away over the sea to the Land of Eternal Youth. And there they stayed for a thousand years. But Oisin was a traveller. He missed his caravan. He missed all his old pals. The princess told him if he ever went back he would die, because he was a thousand years old. But the princess couldn't bear to see Oisin sad, so she gave him her great white horse and told him he must never get off its back. When Oisin returned to his caravan, the people swarmed around him, rejoicing at the legendary hero's return. But by God! A terrible thing happened. The saddle broke and Oisin fell down on the ground in front of their eyes. Here is what they saw: they saw the most handsome man on Earth get older and older, and greyer and greyer, and his hair grew down to his waist and his fingernails grew three inches long, and his bones began to crumble and snap! And then Oisin disintegrated before their eyes and turned into dust. A little heap of ashes on the ground was all that was left of him.
- Welfare Man: And how many children do you have?
- Mrs. Murphy: About fifteen, Sir.
- Mr. Murphy: [stuttering] Aye, about fifteen, Sir. Roughly.
- Welfare Man: You mean you don't know how many children you have?
- Mr. Murphy: Eh... eh... I'd have to count them, Sir.
- Mrs. Murphy: Children, children! Come here. To the nice man.
- [All the children from the neighbourhood are running towards her and the social welfare man]
- Welfare Man: [Counts the children] Fourteen. How many boys and how many girls?
- Mr. Murphy: I don't count them like that, Sir.
- Welfare Man: Hands up for the girls.
- Ossie: What did the princess look like?
- Grandfather: Close your eyes. Now do you see a beautiful woman?
- Ossie: Yea.
- Grandfather: Well, that's her. That's the beautiful princess.
- Ossie: [Ossie and Tito in their flat, sitting on the back of the horse and watching a Western on tv] Was the old Wild West in Ireland?
- Papa Reilly: There still is. On the other side of the mountains.
- Ossie: Were the travellers the Indians?
- Papa Reilly: No. We're the cowboys.
- Grandfather: [lifting Ossie down from the horse's back] Come on. Time for bed.
- Ossie: I don't want to get old.
- Grandfather: Ah, you won't get old Ossie. Not yet.