Kidnapping

It seems the motivation for this film was, "Let's take every cliché in the book, put some boobs in it, and call it a movie." There's the police sargeant's "If you walk out that door, it'll cost you your badge!" and "If you keep going like this, he'll walk!", the hero of the movie and his chimpanzee - YES, A CHIMPANZEE (uhm, what was the point of that?), a woman kidnapped from a zoo with absolutely no bystanders anywhere, the sleazy pickup artist who was definitely supposed to be Italian, Lance LeGault as the bad guy... cliché, cliché, cliché!! And the worst thing of all is, I watched this pitiful excuse for cinematography to the end, happy to hear the English language after being an ex-pat here in Prague.

Czech TV bought this film because it was cheap - they didn't even bother to dub it. You shouldn't even bother to watch it.

Kidnapped comes off better than you think, from an array of B grade actors who give quite very believable performances. On a young pretty girl's (Evenson) 16th birthday, she is snatched while at the zoo, with her older sister (fine veteran b actress Crampton) after being harangued by a sleazy fast talking dude. Is it that guy out of Becker. She's become another pawn, another piece of meat in the underground porn industry. She seeks help from Naughton as a clichéd cop, where a relationship develops, Crampton staying with him, in no way cramping his style. He also has a primate friend, adding something extra to this slightly dull, though evoking drama about the realities of L.A. sleaze. Naughton and Crampton go undercover as porn film investors. When Naughton strips, one of the pornographers, floored, asks a question, in the most classic line of the movie. Napier as the lieutenant, is clichéd casting, as is General Hospital's Scotty as another cop. Again bad dude Robert Dryer plays another repugnant thug, one of the pornographers. With a tragic ending not like you think, Kidnapped is not half bad, with some nasty and unsettling moments, and Evenson does light up the screen, especially in close up shots.

My review was written in May 1987 after a Cannes Film Festival Market screening.

Boasting a solid cast, "Kidnapped" is a routine action thriller done well. It's not special enough to make any noise theatrically, but is good programming fodder for other media.

Barbara Crampton and Kim Evenson are blonde sisters on the town inL.a. Who get mixed up with a photographer (Chick Vennera) trying to pick them up on the street. He has Evenson kidnapped and delivered to gangster Lance LeGault wh drugs her. Not to spoil the melodrama that follows, it's a fairly conventional action drama, lacking in surprises, but still able to hold one's interest.

What's missing here is the drive-in movie fun (and some low-down content) that made Howard or Hikmet's earlier films something of a guilty pleasure, even though the subject matter is about the world of Adult Cinema. As his final picture, it adds little to his legacy.

The mid-80's turned out a series of mediocre movies about women disappearing for different reasons...white slavery, organ harvesting, serial killers. This one doesn't even have these plotlines going for it. Worth seeing only if you want to see David Naughton in a role besides "American Werewolf in London". Otherwise look for "Angel" or "Coma" and you'll get more drama.

Language, brief nudity, drug-use, violence

"Kidnapped" is a very annoying film. It all starts with Barbara Crampton's ridiculous character, which morphs from scared screaming and helpless, to super hero in the final frames. It takes way too long to reach the weak finale, and at 100 minutes the film seems interminable. If the padding involving a pet chimpanzee, and David Naughton's cutesy infatuation with Crampton, had been eliminated, the movie would have benefited. The best scenes involve some comedic moments in a porno shoot, and Jimmy Walker as an adult video shop owner. Otherwise, expect some of the worst stunt work, some of the corniest dialog, and acting no better than a porno flick. Naughton, Crampton, and especially Charles Napier, are totally wasted. - MERK