Caged Fury

...or cry 'till you laugh. One or the other. It's a terrible film, but you've got to be made of stone not to enjoy this. There is line drawn in the sand of the desert where all bad films dwell. It separates those films that are just bad from those that are so appallingly terrible they just have to be seen. The word tacky doesn't do this justice. you absolutely have to see this film. Get a couple of mates around and watch it with plenty of alcohol on standby. I promise you you'll enjoy it.

Plus, Dirk Ramsey? There's never been an action hero like him before. There never will be again. He should have his own theme tune.

This has got to be one of the funniest films of all time; featuring the most underrated action hero ever to grace the silver screen. For those of you who have yet to watch this masterpiece, Dirk Ramsey is the MAN! He is far superior to Spiderman; his intellect makes Batman look like a dunce, while his strength, even Superman would struggle against the might that is Ramsey. And did I mention that he oozes sex appeal? Throw in sleazy Eric Estrada as his side-kick Victor, and you have all the ingredients for one hell of a viewing. Also, all the 'ladies' on offer apart from Cat and Tracey Collins, are porn stars in real life, you've gotta love this film.

Pure 80s cheese for fans of women's prison flicks.

Kat (Roxanna Michaels), fresh off the farm, goes to L.A. to make it as an actress and gets thrown in a fake prison where the inmates are sold as sex slaves. Her sister Tracy (Elena Sahagun) comes to her rescue, along with Erik Estrada and Richard Barathy as a mullet-ed beefcake that karate chops his way though everyone. Of course, the two guys ride off into the sunset on their Harleys with the two women behind.

Typical lesbian, leather-clad warden (Mindi Miller), huge sadistic matrons, shower scenes, simulated sexual scenes, and lots of fighting. Lots of recognizable porn stars for the fans.

For serious fans of this genre only.

...if you went into this, expecting a MOVIE!

Let's just say as a movie, "Caged Fury" makes a great peep show!

Same old song: innocent farm girl goes to big city (LA, if I recall) looking for stardom, ends up in the kind of prison that is an actual front for a white slavery ring; her sister goes looking for her, ends up in the same prison.

NOW, here is where things get kind of confusing. You see, this movie doesn't know whether or not it wants to be a sleazy women's prison movie, a porn flick, a cop movie or a kung-fu flick!

I mentioned porn flick because this one has a big number of porn stars here, many under assumed names. If you're a fan, you'll recognize Kashcha, Ron Jeremy, Tyffany Million, Janine Lindemuller and Julia Parton.

It also has Erik Estrada (!!!) as a cop/detective looking for the girls and the huge, bulky Richard Barathy as his partner, who happens to know some beefy kung-fu moves that put all the baddies in their place. And not only are these two here, but there are also appearances by Michael Parks, Jack Carter, Paul Smith (yes, Beast Rabban from the 1984 "Dune" movie) and James Hong.

Anyway, there's loads of female nudity (it IS a women's prison flick, after all), kung-fu fighting, simulated sex, plenty of stupidity, truck-loads of prison stereotypes, entire continents of beautiful chicks and an ending where everything turns out okay. Oh, and did I mention Erik Estrada?

You can't expect much from movies like this, but at least "Caged Fury" throws in a lot more than other films do. Name another women's prison flick with Erik Estrada... that's what I thought.

Two stars for "Caged Fury", plus one more for Erik Estrada - he needs more work like this.

There are some films in this world that are just so bad that they're hilarious, and Caged Fury is one of these. The hero of the story is Dirk Ramsey, a be-mulleted kung-fu superman who attempts to rescue the inmates of a women's prison. He kicks through brick walls and tackles entire gangs with only his wits and his ridiculous wig to protect him. Dirk's one liners are cornier than extremely corny corn, and the actor playing Dirk is obviously overweight and out of shape. However, this means that the fights within the film are some of the funniest martial arts scenes ever committed to film as poor old Dirk struggles to lift his leg above his waist. Most of the actresses in the film are porn stars, and spend the movie swoonig over Dirk and his burly chum Victor. I thoroughly recommend this film for anyone who enjoys a good laugh. Make a night of it; invite some friends over, stick on some Europe or Iron Maiden and watch this movie in the context that it belongs in, a celebration of pure 1980's cheese.