My review was written in February 1984 after watching the film at a Midtown Manhattan screening room.
"Kippebang" is a flat, understated attempt at romantic comedy, made for British television in 1982 as part of the "First Love" series, but virtually evaporating on the big screen. U. S. Theatrical release via UA Classics comes several months after the picture in video cassette form has been available in domestic video stores.
Writer Jack Rosenthal's consistently precious script matches the romantic problems of young adolescents (hero is 14) with those of their elders, as the English teacher (Alison Steadman) must deal with an unplanned pregnancy,l the father being the school groundskeeper (Garry Cooper).
Very thin material emphasizes running gags, most noxious of which is the kids reciting the nonsense phrase "P'tang, Yang, Kipperbang" (pic's original title in Britain, pointlessly followed by a grunt, shortened for U. S. release), as an example of the youngsters' codes and rituals.. Young cast members throw away their dialog in mumbled, naturalistic readings, reducing potential chuckles to groaners.
Plot gimmicks, generally overemphasized, include the hero Alan (John Albasiny) dreaming of his first kiss with plain classmate Ann (Abigail Gruttenden), with attempted suspense generated as he is cast in a dull school play in which he is supposed to kiss co-star Ann in the final scene.
Device of a voiceover narrator turning most events into cricket match play-by-play (representing Alan's wish-fulfillment point-of-view) is overworked, as are the frequent references back to World War II (groundskeeper is fake war hero, leading to the predictable disillusionment of the hero).
Director Michael Apted appears uncertain how to approach this material, combining the general understatement with a coy approach to vulgar issues of adolescent sexs (Alan and his two pals form the inevitable central trio of sex-obsessed young teens) and hyped-up crosscutting between the school play's climax and police arresting the groundskeeper.
Adult actors, especially Steadman, turn in good performances, but the kids are a drag. In his big finale scene, pouring his heart out to Ann, John Albasiny delivers his lines into the ground, inadvertently giving a worse performance than his intentionally incompetent non-acting during the school play. Tech credits are okay.
