La Mission fantastique

It isn't the greatest film of all time, of course, but it is certainly one of the oddest. No matter how many times I see this film (and I've seen it quite a bit) I never get tired of the relentless, manic energy this film spews from the screen.

The plot is so inane that I'm tempted to ignore it. It may or may not take place during the Second World War- in any case, the Japanese invade Canada, and, in the process, capture Abraham Lincoln and a handful of other dignitaries. This situation is of course intolerable to our Chinese allies, who immediately hire a crack team of mercenaries to rescue the captives. Wackiness ensues.

At various points we encounter a village full of leopard skin-clad amazons led by some guy in a tuxedo, a haunted house full of hopping zombies, a ridiculous song & dance number in a restaurant, and an army of Japanese Road Warrior-style Nazis who surf on top of old American muscle cars. The movie is hilarious, and, as far as I'm concerned, a must watch.

My God. I don't really know what to say.. I expected your usual old-school Chan flick. Not even Close. It's a movie about a bunch of goofy characters on a mission to save some people.. I think. Either way, it is TOTAL fantasy with that strange slapsticky Asian comedy that us westerners just don't quite get. Totally off the hook, and here's the clincher. Jackie isn't even a main character! Just an old movie he did as a favor for Jimmy Wang Yu (I think) repackaged under Jackie's name for obvious reasons (moolah).

Definitely one of the strangest movies I have ever seen.

If you have any semblance of a sense of humour, you will asphyxiate with laughter at this movie. Jackie Chan only plays a bit part (while holding a chicken most of the time), but the Chinese elvis impersonator, the legendary escape artist "GREASE LIGHTNING", the football helmet wearing nazis, the bandit musical interlude, and the tribe of nubile Amazons will leave you wanting more. Nothing can ever hope to compare to this film. Stop trying to make movies people! - JUST WATCH THIS INSTEAD!

What the hell? This movie has everything! Hopping undead corpses. Crazed Amazons. Ghosts who cheat at cards. Japanese Nazis who attack riding atop 1970s clunker cars. Stupid musical numbers. Abraham Lincoln as a World War II general. Throw in loads of gratuitous violence, Chinese guys dressed in kilts and Elvis jumpsuits, and, er, Jacky Chan (and his chicken) and you have quite possibly the stupidest movie ever made. You won't know what to make of it either, but if you have the proper amount of beer on hand, and a few fellow appreciators of c**p, it won't matter in the slightest.

Except for about 1,000 boring spots, this film is one of the most bemusingly funny "bad movie night" attractions I've ever seen. An absolute trainwreck of a production, Fantasy Mission Force (as its title translates, or so I'm told) is so profoundly and utterly stupid that it deserves a place of honor in the pantheon of cinematic ineptitude.

Still, it's funny!

There's a musical number in the first act which, although it fails to tie in with the subsequent story in any fashion, has got to be seen to be believed. Taking place at a what appears to be a huge honorary banquet for white male law students...oh, never mind.

If you love bad film as much as I do - "Plan 9 From Outer Space," "Glen Or Glenda," "Song Of Norway," "On Deadly Ground," "Boxing Helena," "An Alan Smithee Film," "Battlefield Earth" and the like - you will want to fashion a religion around this masterpiece of the inane.

Nothing, and I mean nothing, in this film makes even the slightest bit of sense. It makes "Godzilla Vs. Megalon" seem like an algebraic equation by comparison.