- Santa Claus: Well, when Voldar "accidentally" left us in the airlock and then came up here and "accidentally" threw the door switch, we knew we had to get out of there in a hurry or that would be the end of us. Eh, uh, "accidentally," of course.
- TV News Announcer: [News report after Santas disappearance] And Mrs. Claus has positively identified the kidnappers as Martians.
- [after being asked if he is going to use a rocket sleigh]
- Santa Claus: No siree! We're going out the good ol' fashioned way. Prancer and Dancer and Donder and Blitzen, and Vixen and Nixon... oh, consarnit I get those names mixed up, but the KIDS know their names.
- Andy Henderson: What is this strange looking creature over here?
- Santa Claus: Oh, Winky made that. That's his idea of a Martian.
- Andy Henderson: A Martian? Wow-wee-wow! I'd hate to meet a creature like that on a dark night.
- [Voldar doesn't think it's worth the trouble to kidnap Santa Claus and fly him to Mars]
- Voldar: All this trouble over a fat little man in a red suit!
- TV News Announcer: Here's another UFO Bulletin: The Defense Department has just announced that the unidentified flying object suddenly disappeared from our radar screen. They believe the object has either dissintegrated in space, or it may be a space ship from another planet which has the ability to nullify all radar beams.
- Voldar: If we take them with us to Mars, Santa's disappearance will remain a mystery. No one on Earth will ever know that Santa Claus was kidnapped by Martians.